I wonder at what age a human would taste best. Child? Teenager? Young adult? You probably wouldn’t want an old person whose muscles had wasted away or who was ravaged by disease.
I’m 51. I wonder if I’m “past my prime” as meat.
Or Maria Marinara.
Cannibal societies in the Pacific and South Asia tended to be pig eating societies, and they would cook human meet the same way. Of course, that usually just means throwing it on some coals and cooking until “done”. But I would say treat it like pork. Unless you’re Jewish or Muslim.
Vindaloo seems the obvious choice.
If I absolutely had to eat someone, I’d like to be be able to tell them - honestly - “This is going to hurt me a lot more than it’s going to hurt you.”
Plus, vindaloo! The best of all possible cannibal curries.
HA!
I would go for the same part that Hannibal Lector did. On a chicken, they are called the oysters. (Little nubbins of perfectly tender dark mean, near where the wings meets the back). On a human, I think these muscles would be in the upper back.
I would cook them in the same style that I cook pot roast (like a slow braise).
IIRC, human meat is referred to as “long pig”.
So I am thinking, BBQ. After all, the secret is in the sauce…
The buttocks could be served as a crudo…
The intestines? Chitlins, or used as a casing for the mystery meat / Soylent Green sausages sure to follow…
Anonymously.
Bold and underline is mine.
And you are a fool. You are discarding some of the best meats available.
And just like the tenderloin, I’m guessing far tougher on a human than on the beasts we regularly eat. I really can’t figure out what parts on a healthy human would be tender - we just use most of 'em too much because we’re upright and it takes a lot of work to stay that way. Maybe the abs?
From Idi Amin: (Describing the taste, allegedly) Salty. Even more salty than leopard meat.
So if you know how to prepare leopard meat you’re all set.
Do not call me a fool, please. This isn’t The Pit and you needn’t get carried away with trying to play up to your nickname.
I do not enjoy the flavor of many organ meats and in wild game the organs can be infected with some unpleasant parasites. In a human, they will likely have the same unpleasant flavor and, in the case of the liver, have a high concentration of wastes and toxins that I do not wish to consume.
You may feast on all the meat by-products it pleasures you to consume.
Good day.
So, would vegetarians taste better? Vegans?
We haven’t, of course, addressed, the soon-to-be eaten’s profession, and I think it bears mention.
I’m sure no one would to eat a clown.
Re-read post #8 - I specifically referenced a particular ingredient’s profession.
Best to reference Sweeny Todd’s A Little Priest song…
That’s not funny.
Would an athlete taste a little gamey?
Would a hooker taste tart?
Would a sailor taste salty?
This is at least third-hand hearsay, but I once read an account by a missionary who said that a cannibal once told him that the flesh of a young girl’s buttock was the best.
Red meat, red wine.
Real baby back ribs a la Jonathon Swift.
I wouldn’t. I’d just bite into someone like an apple.
Cooking? No no no. For an unforgettable culinary experience, make it sashimi.
When you consider the most tender, flavorful cuts of meat are very young – lamb, veal, suckling pig – then it’s obvious that babies and toddlers are likely to be very tasty. It’s probably even better to raise them from scratch, so you can control their diet and avoid the toxins that are rumored to make human meat less palatable.
One of these days, I’d like to experiment with babies raised Kobe-style – feed 'em beer every day for the first two years of life, should produce very nice marbling of the meat.