Something strange happened to me and I’m wondering if anyone has had an experience like this.
I subscribed to match.com on a whim, set up a profile and contacted a few of the computer generated matches that I came across.
The only one I heard back from was the one who had a 100% match and it was pretty abrupt saying (exact words), “hi, sorry, i really don’t think this is going to work out. bye”
Um, what? No, I wasn’t expecting anything because I figure this internet shit is a shot in the dark for everyone and the email I wrote was fairly innocuous but what struck me was the wording of the reply and the fact that there was a reply at all.
Anyone want to chime in?
I’d chime in, but I don’t think it would work out for me. :rolleyes:
I guess your contact figured dusting you off quickly was more polite than ignoring you completely. Oh, for the days when etiquette was a bit more well defined.
Bye
don’t you know it’s just a big advertising scam?
they say they’ll match with someone but never send anything through.
they just want your e-mail adress. have fun with the spam! 
This “internet shit” is great. How else can you have a potential mate fill out a long questionnaire before you even acknowledge their existence? Anyway.
You merely ran into one of the people who wasn’t interested, who had the good manners to say so instead of leaving you in the dark. Keep at it if you’re truly interested in meeting someone this way. It takes a long time – I didn’t meet the love of my life until eight months after I started on udate.com.
That’s me, chiming in.
I second AlbertRose’s chime.
I met my wife via match.com, though my ad had run for close to a year before she responded to it, and I only ever had one other response.
As for the “spam bait” claim… I can’t vouch for their business model. I just think personal ads make a lot of sense, and they’re about as good a forum as any.
It sucks that the person didn’t even bother to send you any naked pictures.
Well, I met my wife back in High School before this “internet” thing got as big as it is today, and call me old-fashioned, but I just don’t see it as much of a viable medium for trying to find a mate-for-life.
Not to say it’s not got good points.
At least you can be a perfectly comfortable drunked, nasty heap of trash blubbering in front of your terminal and still sound like Shakespeare to the ladies.
F’nord.
I’ve been on match for a month now. Hey, at least you got a response…I haven’t received a reply from any of my e-mails, not even a “sorry, not interested.”
I should back up a bit. I went on it because a few of my friends said they’d been on it, and had met a couple of dates. I figured that, since my divorce was recently finalised, it couldn’t hurt as a way to get back on the scene. Now, however, I think I should have waited a bit longer, and tried other avenues, before going to Internet dating. Firstly, while the idea of meeting an attractive lady while sitting in one’s underwear and drinking beer and sitting in front of your computer has some merit :p, it’s a poor substitute for human contact and conversation. Secondly, if your self-esteem is shaky ([sub]raising hand meekly[/sub]), it’s not going to be helped when you log on to match to see things like “Times your profile has been viewed this year: 5.” (Or, even worse, on date-com–yes I’m trying that one too–“There are 0 people interested in you.”) But, as I say, I haven’t been trying long…although the initial signs aren’t too promising.
As for it being a scam to get e-mail addresses…I did receive a porn spam a week or two after starting my account. Since I set up the e-mail address specifically for my match account, and hadn’t given anyone else the addy, I’m not sure how else the spammers could have gotten it. Not a good way to do business, match.
Thanks, don’t mind if I do. 
For what it’s worth, my wife and I met via Match.com. This was several years ago, before they became the nationally-advertised Internet powerhouse they are now. :rolleyes: The point is, they might have changed in the last few years, but you can point to me, and Umbriel, above, also, as success stories.
I’ve been watching match.com You do have to pay to reply, $24.95 I think, but the same listings pretty much appear at Yahoo Personals & its cheaper. I just like to look at them cause Im in a small city & I know some of the women on it.
Like the others said, rasinbread, you should count yourself lucky that this person sent you a note at all. Most don’t bother. Which raises a big question: Why would someone bother to put together a profile, but not bother to respond to an introductory e-mail responding to it? Those profiles take a long time to fill out.
I was on Match.com for 6 months. Met two quality people out of it, still dating one. But undrestand that I gave it a lot of effort - I think from a guy’s perspective you’d have to (men outnumber women there 3:1).
Match.com beats Yahoo’s service simply because they allow you to ask some important questions precisely, dealing with things like location, age, and religion.
But the most unnerving thing is to respond to a profile that is EXACTLY what you are looking for, and vice-versa, and getting NO RESPONSE. :mad: (pause while I simmer down… this is not the rant room…)
sigh I have been on Match.com for 6 months. Have not heard a peep from anyone. I do feel I have an interesting profile and was not a boring cookie cutter AD.
Oh well Might make a rather horrible profile, living at home, no job, loves pet rats and spiders, multiple tatoos… See how many sterotypes of losers I can be.
either that or change my title to : “Man with waterbed seeks woman with digital camera.”
Osip
You should thank your lucky stars the person didn’t write anything else, because they sound like a major head case.
I’ve had women respond to my profile and to the email that I sent to them. A went on dates or met with about 4 or 5 women before meeting the woman that I’m dating right now. She’s a wonderful person, and responded to my profile. I think it’s great for increasing your chances of connecting with people, but it does take work i.e. tweaking your profile text and what you’re looking for.
Personal ads are not going to be a good way to meet people until the sites stop charging $25 a month just to respond.
Back when Yahoo personals was free I had a personal ad that received five to ten replies per week. Some of it was porn spam and some of it was from morons who hadn’t bothered to read my ad, but I still got at least two serious replies per week. I met several interesting people as a result.
Right now I have an ad posted on Match.com and another on Yahoo and I haven’t received a single response in months, save for the occasional porn spam. It’s depressing.
I think you have to do three things when doing the online dating thing:
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Cast a wide net. Don’t wait for people to view your ad. The guy has to go through the trouble of looking at all the women’s profiles and emailing all the ones he finds interesting.
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Lower your standards. If you’re real picky, you’re not going to find many women who fit your mold.
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Have a thick skin. Don’t expect responses from everyone.
Also, for those women who ask for a picture, I’d include one in my response, even if I’m telling her to check my personal out (where there’s already a picture). I think a lot of these women wind up with truckloads of responses, and just open the ones with attachments.
If you write interesting stuff, you’ll get email from women on the Straight Dope board. That works very well. I won’t say how I know this though