Go for it.
black mildew spots on my pants I was soaking after I spilled coffee on them
too much paper everywhere
a zit on my lip that now looks like herpes
I actually got irritated by someone and something that really has no significance in my life
Me, too.
So I climbed out of the Pit, and went to bed.
Ha! I was actually talking about work, but good call! 
I got little spatters of either tar or blacktop material on my pants cuffs and canvas walking shoes yesterday during my work commute. :mad: Anyone know how to get it out?
Very mini, but I am full of rage.
LABEL your chocolates, Palmer. I snagged two foil-covered Palmer Chocolate half-eggs on my way past the front desk this morning, noting that they were not labelled, but betting that they were peanut-butter filled. They were not. I hate stupid puffed rice chocolate (“Crackle”) and now I have no candy.
The job we’ve been waiting to come up, for my husband - which is essentially the job he’s been doing, but in Sydney rather than London - finally appeared after three years of semi-seriously discussing emigration. However, first mini-rant, my mum died only three months ago and I’m just not up to thinking about such a big move right now, regardless of how much we’ve been planning this.
So, hey universe thanks for the crappy timing. What are you doing- trying to see how much pressure I can take without snappng?
Then, I’ve just about got used to the idea and even to start to get a bit excited, when the stupid short sighted company we both work for pulls one of their usual stunts. We had a bad first quarter and they’ve responded by freezing all head count globally - even in subsidiaries where the results weren’t bad. So now we don’t know if the job’s even open at all.
So second mini-rant - what the ever loving fuck you stupid bosses? In the 10 years I’ve worked for you you’ve done this stupid global freeze thing over and over. Has it ever worked? As far as I can see it just pisses everyone off, particularly those of us who have to do two or three jobs to cover the gaps you won’t fill. I get that in some territories it might be a necessary temporary measure, but to impose it as a global blanket ban is just lazy and stupid. This time it looks like I’m going to be affected in multiple ways and that narks me.
Finally, I get a call today from my panicked GP. Last week I asked him for a referral to a kidney specialist, to check on a conditition which I’ve had since I was a child, but which I’ve basically neglected for 20 years or more. Essentially my kidneys leak protein and have done for 32 years if not more, although I have no other symptoms. I know this, he knows this. I only asked for the referral because I thought I really ought to just get it checked. Anyway the baseline bloods he wanted to do came back and, shock! my kidneys are leaking protein. I knew it, if he’d had read my notes recently he would have known it. Ok, it needs checking. Things may have moved on since the doctors last told me I’m an anomaly and not to worry about it. I get that. I just wanted a check on it. So why did I spend all morning googling kidney failure and the effects of dialysis?
Third mini- rant - self, chill the fuck out. Stop catastrophising - you’re probably not going to drop down dead tomorrow, any more than you were ever going to. Nothing’s changed. It will be fine.
Coo, this actually does make me feel better.
Computer assholes are here upgrading our computers, it’s well past my time to go home but I can’t cause, they’re still upgrading our stuff. Not their fault I realize but damnit I hate staying later for no reason of my own …
Also my first mini-rant …
I finally got a call back about one of the positions I interviewed for. Didn’t get it.
Happy Birthday To Me!
Hang in there, really…it’s all temporary. (I hope I don’t get pitted for that). Go protest naked—“you don’t know what you’re missing! What? Oh yah. It’s my birthday suit!”
I brushed my hair right before breakfast and then got a hair in my mouth while I was eating my bagel. Best weightloss plan ever.
Hey! We were promised decanters, dammit :mad:
Look you stupid bitch. I just got this car, I’m on my way home from the dealership, I haven’t even had a chance to call and switch the insurance yet. Stop tailgating me, back the fuck off, pay attention when lights change (hell yes, I’m stopping) and generally GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME YOU STUPID COW.
The worst part of it? The place where she very nearly rear ended me because I dared to stop for a red light is right in front of the Civic Center / POLICE HEADQUARTERS.
I’d…kinda like to use a different C word in describing her…
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I have a gawdamned cold and am miserable. If I take Mucinex (what a horrible name and the commercials suck, too), I end up coughing until I get dizzy. If I take Tylenol Severe Cough and Cold, I get loopy. I was up at 315 this morning, unable to breathe thanks to being a huge ball of gunk. My neti pot didn’t even provide relief, now I have salty snot. Urp.
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No one will trade phone coverage tomorrow with me. I sound like I gargled pebbles, can barely get a sentence out without coughing myself silly, but no. Great teamwork y’all. Bastiges.
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Okay, father of neighbor bitch, you’re a freaking role model for parents. Your daughter shits rainbows. Now teach her how to turn off her freaking back door light so it quits shining its’ super white light into our bedrooms. Teach her how to plow snow after 5am (and while you’re at it, how NOT to throw chunks of ice against my house). Teach her how to mow her freaking yard. Where I was standing while you were gabbing? Her yard. Not mine. Yet here I was, mowing it as she doesn’t think it’s hers. How about teaching her how to keep her garbage bin more than 5’ away from my bedroom window on those warm, moist summer mornings?
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Self, get off your ass and get back into doing shit. Your yard looks like crap. Dandelions, creeping charley, other assorted unknown weeds need to be addressed before your only option is Round Up-ping the whole damn thing and starting over. Plants still need to be uncovered, for fucks sake. You have no money to hire anyone and your kid can’t thanks to allergies. So just quit your self whining and do it, dammit. [Although I did get most of the yard mowed at least - until i ran out of gas]
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Mother nature? I want a storm tonight. A great gullywasher, thunder banging, lightning clapping storm. I am tired of watching the clouds roll in… but everything breaking apart as it gets to the cities.
The first one’s free. 
Aw. Sorry about the job, happy about the birthday.
I got a green light out driving last night, and as I’m about to go, an idiot jaywalked in front of my car. I honked at him, and he gave me the finger. Dude, I can honk at you or smash you between two cars - your choice. (Congratulations on your new car, Chimera. )
They DO label their chocolates (such as they are). There’s the word “Palmer” on them, with the “P” stylized to look like a rabbit’s head.
That label lets the reader know that whatever is in the package isn’t really edible.
I support this statement 100%. If you see the “Palmer” label on something, treat it like a lite skull and crossbones…whatever is inside really isn’t worth eating. It probably won’t kill you, but you’ll regret eating it.
Dear apartment neighbors. I know ducks are cute, but they don’t belong in the pool. Setting out a floating lounge chair in the water with cracker and bread crumbs for them is a bad, bad idea. You’re going to ruin our cement pond, you dang hillbillies.
I am trying so hard not to laugh. And I know that it’s gross and unhealthy and unkind to the ducks. But you nailed it with Ellie Mae!
PS: when I first started reading this I thought you meant yellow rubber ducks.
I had a slight ear ache last week, went to the doctor, and tested positive for strep throat. Went back yesterday for a follow up and the rapid strep test came back positive again, which meant another shot and a prescription for a different antibiotic. Not so bad, considering my throat has only been slightly sore off and on since my first doctor’s visit and my ear feels better, right? Yet I woke up in the middle of the night last night and couldn’t get back to sleep because my brain wouldn’t stop thinking about how the strep test was positive again. I think I’m going to replace the head to my electric toothbrush instead of just using the cleaning function on the stand but I sure hope this second course of antibiotics works.