One of my favorite love songs from my teen years was turned into a commercial jingle for some crap I refuse to even mention because it’s horrid crap and if I give you the name of the song, you’ll likely search for it, thus giving the horrid crap more hits and that’ll still be around.
They sure have. Hell, I remember being warned you can get a ticket if you’re eating while driving.
They don’t read anything but the Bible and Christian books. Me, I like my reading entertaining. I’ve actually figured out the next three titles of these rants(June, july, august )
Hear. 
I shoulda been a proofreader.
Glad to hear you didn’t mind us critiquing your “church”.
And hey, even if you “shoulda” been a proofreader, be glad you didn’t. You’d be out of work (because no one seems to employ proofreaders anymore… not a single website or magazine, even the Times, or the Post, or the Atlantic).
Can you beat the titles I had for a couple of the June mini-rants in the past? I’m very fond of June, I’m worried about the Peeve.
Argh! I wish that had been intentional. It’s a great example of Guadere’s Law. Oh, and “shoulda”? Surely, you did that on purpose, didn’t you?
Yes, shoulda sounded more cool than should have. I was thinking Ju-no better!
(Don’t want to dig up the workplace rants, sorry…)
Due to the pandemic, a full 25% of my job is now on hold. I can’t file motions. I still have random clean up stuff / entering orders from processes that were underway before March, but otherwise no proactive work on these cases. I had a reduced caseload in response because of handling all those motions.
“Luckily” they’ve slightly beefed up my caseload, so now I have about an 85% caseload.
With working entirely from home, there’s no bullshit in office chatter, I can actually hear on the phone, and I’m getting stuff accomplished.
Now I literally have nothing to do. I’ve been at work for three hours and all my daily work is done.
I volunteered to assist a coworker who was seriously in the weeds. Usually, I have no problems doing this kind of clean up, done it in the past for other workers. Unfortunately, this worker, who has been here SIX YEARS, clearly has no fucking clue what they are doing. Every single case I’ve touched is messed up. Some small issues, some massive issues. Missing court orders. Un-entered court orders. Court orders entered completely wrong. Plans (which drive a lot of our daily work) have no basis in reality or have simply been replicated without work actually being done in a year. I’ve tried walking them through what to do and receive “yeah, yeah, I know, I know”. Clearly, you don’t. Brought it up to our supervisor who said she’s aware of problems and they are “working on it”. How. Seriously, how are you working on it? Looked at a case this morning - generic useless plan that has been replicated since last September, last updated Thursday. Too bad the clients have had major changes since September, charging needed to be adjusted, worker says “call client” - too bad client is incarcerated now. It’s horrible and I don’t want to deal with it.
I have a work related rant also, though mine is mostly about me and not about work.
I am at work. I am caffeinated. I am organized. I have tasks to do. So why can’t I make myself do the tasks. Just do the tasks. They are not hard. You have all the information. Do it. Just do the task. I feel like I can’t do anything right now.
Ok, I’m gonna turn off this distraction and attempt again to do the task.
So stop volunteering to do other people’s jobs for them?
Your boss may be unmotivated to fix the problem because everything eventually gets fixed (as if by magic, meaning you).
You do realize that most of the work world works on the rule that getting all your tasks done quickly and efficiently means you get to take it easy the rest of the day. Try it, don’t volunteer, and see if the boss realizes that something needs to be done (other than tell you to over-perform so that others can under-perform).
~ ~ ~
And, slalexan, I hear you. How did I used to do a hundred things every day? I miss those days where a task (say, a conversation with my sister) would just be sandwiched in while I was doing three other things. Now I’m stressed that I have to FaceTime her tomorrow (because she’s too much of a Frustrated Extroverted to just hear people’s voices these days).
I mean, I have another half-hour-long task tomorrow, I don’t have time for two of those!
Somewhere, Gaudere is smiling.
Got un-friended on FB for pointing out that, technically, you can’t shave a vagina. Or at least, you probably shouldn’t try. Not only that, the person screen shotted the post, drew an arrow to my comment, and posted it as an example of things he unfriends people for. A half-educational and half-humorous post isn’t allow, apparently.
Oh well.
Would have if I could have. In my quarterly, I stupidly mentioned I was caught up and looking for stuff to do. She already knew, as she’s a micromanager, checks everyone’s worklists daily. She suggested I help my coworker and I agreed.
And as far as “taking it easy”, other than browsing here and a few other places sporadically during the day, that’s not my thing.
“Actually here that”? 
Seriously, if you want to blame spell-check, fine with me. I’m pretty sure something I saw on Facebook is true: “Spell-check is that little elf who lives in your phone and is sincerelly trying with all his tiny heart to help you, but he’s very very drunk.”
Sorry about the typo above. I really do know how to spell “sincerely”. I was having a weird vision issue at the time.
Oooh, slalexan! You should read this article! It’s very entertaining and also might be of some help: Pandemic! Productivity! Life! Hacks! (from a deeply unproductive & freaked out person) – CaptainAwkward.com
I also like to read stuff over at this site: https://yesandyes.org/
I’m a Viking at finding motivational stuff on the internet that inspires me to…find more ways to fuck off on the internet.
Elon Musk has had a kid and he’s named it X Æ A-12. What an absolute bell end.
The first time a pastor says that to me is the last time I attend that church.
That little slip has already been discussed. See the short exchange upthread between SuntanLotion and me.
Attention hotels:
Enough with the fucking futuristic plumbing fixtures! We’ve had running water for some time now, and we’ve pretty well worked it out that a dial fixture is the most intuitive, easy to use fixture in a shower. We don’t need the new, “improved” controls that are completely fucking inscrutable!
Nice hotel, upscale even. I step into the capsule of a shower and find two shower heads, controlled by multiple stalk controls of some kind. No indication of their operation, just trial and error. I have two university degrees, three successful careers and currently fly goddam jets for a living and I can’t figure out your fucking shower! I either get cold water out of one shower head, or nothing out of the other. How about going back to a normal freakin’ shower and leave out the trendy bullshit.
And while we’re at it… how about a full door for the shower? Lately I’m seeing these half or even quarter doors, and the water inevitably gets all over the bathroom floor. Who the hell thought of this? Solutions for problems that don’t exist! We know how showers should work - get back to basics!
Attention hotels:
Enough with the fucking futuristic plumbing fixtures! We’ve had running water for some time now, and we’ve pretty well worked it out that a dial fixture is the most intuitive, easy to use fixture in a shower. We don’t need the new, “improved” controls that are completely fucking inscrutable!
Nice hotel, upscale even. I step into the capsule of a shower and find two shower heads, controlled by multiple stalk controls of some kind. No indication of their operation, just trial and error. I have two university degrees, three successful careers and currently fly goddam jets for a living and I can’t figure out your fucking shower! I either get cold water out of one shower head, or nothing out of the other. How about going back to a normal freakin’ shower and leave out the trendy bullshit.
And while we’re at it… how about a full door for the shower? Lately I’m seeing these half or even quarter doors, and the water inevitably gets all over the bathroom floor. Who the hell thought of this? Solutions for problems that don’t exist! We know how showers should work - get back to basics!