McGonagall the Bridge Builder -- Source of this joke?

Cafe Society
1

“See that bridge? Built it with me own two hands. Carried the stone from the quarry on me own back, placed each one on top of th’other with great skill. Ya could drive a bloody herd of cattle over it without the least fear of damage, so strong is it. But do they call me ‘McGonagall The Bridge Builder’? No! They do na!”

(repeat same basic story with the mill)

“But do they call me ‘McGonagall The Millwright’? No! They do na!”

(repeat same basic story with the kirk)

"So do they call me ‘McGonagall The Kirk Builder’? No! They do na!

But shag one sheep…"
A friend of mine used to rattle this whole routine off in a wonderfully believable Scottish accent. I’ve never been able to track it down, and had to resort here to my own reconstruction of the story, not being able to recall the script any more precisely. In retrospect, it sounds like something Billy Connelly would have written, but that’s purely guesswork on my part.

Anybody recognize it?

2

That joke is ancient, and the central character has been, in versions I’ve heard: Persian, Scottish, Irish, Australian, and maybe Texan.

3

Yeah, ancient it is, and actually I’m not sure that I’ve ever heard a Scottish version.

4

And in the latest version, SDMB poster. :smiley:

5

I’ve heard it as Jewish, too. It’s at least 1930s jewish, if my memory is correct. Isaac Asimov collected it in one of his books on jewish humor.

6

Last night I watched an old Parks & Recreation clip in which Ron Swanson told that joke.

But here is Paul McCartney himself proving why music & not comedy was a better career choice for him…

7

On first seeing the thread title, I’ll admit that my mind went straight to Dundee in 1879; though that scene of course involves the guy not building a bridge, but lamenting the tragic collapse of one…

8

I’ve written my poems in blank and in rhyme
and published so many to be read for all time
they may call me the worst, and that fame I would keep
if whilst a young man I hadn’t shaggéd that sheep

William McGonagall (or not)