Men in Black assessment test #74-b: find the celebrity aliens among us!

Remember at the end of Men in Black when Will Smith’s character, Jay, tells his rookie partner Elle that Dennis Rodman is an alien–and she, after about half a second’s musing, responds that he doesn’t have much of a disguise? Or another scene, earlier in the movie, when Jay sees the worms monitoring aliens via repeater scope and learns that Michael Jackson, Sylvester Stallone, and Susan Powter are all extraterrestrials?

Good. Because I want to play a game on that theme. It’s simple enough: You’re an MIB support staffer aiming to get promoted to the field, and among the requirements is passing the aforementioned Assessment Test 74-B: identify & classify aliens living on Earth on disguise who have become famous. Bonus points if you can name an already-devised fictional race of ETs to which your celebrity belongs, and of course you’ll want to explain why. No points, though, for naming characters famous for portraying an alien and asserting that they’re actually a member of that race–no saying that Leonard Nimoy actually is a Vulcan, in other words.

Any takers?

Leonard Nimoy is clearly a deep cover Romulan operative, spreading disinformation about the edentulous and weak-willed Vulcan Empire as being more important than it is, and sowing the seeds of underestimation by presenting the Romulan Star Empire as something tractable and internally dissident. IT ALL! FITS!!! I TELLS YA!

Cher, who has been aging in reverse for years now, is Orkan.

Having succeded in his quest to insult all life in the universe, Wowbagger the Infinitely Prolonged settles on an utterly insignificant little blue-green planet far out in the uncharted backwater of the unfashionable end of the western spiral arm of the galaxy and assumes the identity of

Dick Clark

Nic-hole Ritchie. I’m convinced she’s a freakin alien!

Well, obviously, Michael Jackson.

And he’s one of the Skelleton/Corpse Alines from They Live!