Thread fail: You left out “Wheelchair bound body builder, health nut, and obnoxious ADA advocate”
Holy shit :eek:
Probably the frail guy. I don’t care if I look like a douche, I just want it over with. I’ve never been in a fight and hopefully I could come out of that one uninjured.
I want to point out that I HAVE had my ass kicked by 2 different girls half my size that had martial arts training. I was in a martial arts class at the time(s)…
I would not want to fight any of them, but all things being equal, I’d use enough force to make sure I won, and to end it as quickly as possible. Of course, if they were the aggressors and were threatening me with great bodily harm, all bets are off; in that case a fair fight means I go home as healthy as possible.
Hey, it’s you or the kid.
You’re not a child-hater, are you?
I picked the midget.
1.) I’m not a fan of beating up on (let alone killing) women or children and would probably get really disturbing flashbacks for the rest of my life if I picked them.
2.) Though it’s tempting to kill the elderly dude (long life, quality of remaining years etc), I don’t want to be on the receiving end of his 'Nam flashback. He doesn’t have to know what decade it is to cause some damage.
3.) Of the two remaining, I don’t have any moral preference and I’ve got an insane reach advantage over the midget. Why risk taking a hit?
If you made the frail dude elderly (which some people seem to think the OP did), then I’d go with him.
Out of curiosity, do you mean literally half your size? I know martial arts training can be a great equalizer, but the only adult female I know who is half my weight just doesn’t have the strength and mass to accomplish much.
Question: are all the options in the same room? What I mean is : Can I club the old man over the head with the midget?
Give me the frail asthmatic. I can hold him off long enough for him to tire himself flailing at me and leave him wheezing on the ground without throwing a punch.
I know, right? If there’s some super powered, mind-controlling uberdouche dead set on making sure you get publicly humiliated, you might as well go whole hog. Get that supernatural douche’s rocks off but good and then maybe it’ll leave you alone afterward.
Enjoy,
Steven
I shouldn’t even have to explain this, but you have been warned for trolling against a specific poster who isn’t even participating in this thread.
Convince me otherwise and I’ll rescind it.
In case I wasn’t clear, none of these opponents will tire themselves out. You will have to beat their ass for them to stop.
Also, you don’t need to beat them to death. Just bad enough that they can’t continue. (Still pretty bad though).
No, just the one option will appear. And no weapons (so you can’t bring your own midget).
Figuratively. I’m 5’10" 190 lbs so she wouldn’t be 2’11" or 95 lbs. Visibly smaller and petite, but strong enough to hurt you if she connected.
Maybe make him a cop like Joe Swanson from Family Guy? Nice!
There’s a real guy like that?
Dear Og, no! :eek: I love children!
(But not fricasséed; gives me gas.)
Can I select the option from the poll, instead of the OP? Because while the OP read “An aggressive but frail, uncoordinated, athema afflicted, bespectled man”, the Poll option read “Aggressive but frail, uncoordinated, asthma afflicted, bespeckled man”.
That’s description matches Mr. Burns to a tee - agressive, but frail, uncoordinated, and asthma afflicted. Sure, he doesn’t wear glasses, but he is bespeckled.
And I doubt the denizens of Sprigfield would begrudge me opening up a can’o’Duff-flavored-whoopass on a him - they couldn’t be bothered to get angry at Maggie when she shot him.
I go for the aggressive nerd. Makes me look least douchy, and is the least likely to get me killed. Win-win.
Yeah, kinda confused me, too.
As for the fight…I’d take the martial arts chick. Seems more fair. And, she’d be smart enough to realize what a choke hold was and tap out before any real damage was done.