Meringue

All through my childhood my mother has attempted to make lemon meringue pies, and she was always disappointed with them. She always complained that they “wept.” I never liked them, because of that gooey gross wet mess on top. I figured that meringue was something I simply didn’t like.

Last year I was making baked alaska with some friends, and we piled meringue on top of the ice cream. Instead of baking it, I just hit it with the blow torch a little. OMFG, it was the bestest dessert EVAR, I love meringue, I love Alaska, and maybe Sarah Palin isn’t such a douchenozzle after all.

A couple of months later, a friend ordered a meringue dessert at a restaurant. I had a taste, and once again I was blown away. Not long after that, said friend bought some baked meringues from the supermarket, and I scarfed down more than my share.

So what is the texture of this stuff supposed to be like? Slimy and gross, or chalky, crunchy, and delicious? What causes it to weep? Does it need to be baked or can a blow torch do the job? Is there such thing as a bakeless lemon meringue pie?

When come back, bring Alaska.

Well, if it’s not baked you’re basically eating whipped raw egg whites. I’m not sure what makes it weep.

If you over whip egg whites, the protein molecules tighten up and squeeze out the water.

And that’s what causes it? I know you have to beat them until they form very stiff peaks – about 10 minutes.

A little cream of tartar helps, and add the sugar very slowly.

The blowtorch idea sounds pretty nifty!

Meringue can be either soft (like on a pie), or chalky/crunchy like the baked ones your friend bought. I’ve only made that variety myself so I don’t have any tips for the pie-topping sort. The crunchy sort are fairly easy - the egg white fluff gets dolloped onto a cookie sheet and baked low/long (as in, 250 for a couple of hours, or something like that).

For a fun alternative, try meringue mushrooms. The time I made these (many years ago), I wound up making a small hole in the underside of the cap, coating the underside with melted chocolage, then sticking the pointed part of the stem into the hole. The chocolate glued it together nicely. The mushrooms were a huge hit (Typo Knig took some to a grad school party and one fellow nearly convinced another to dip one in the ranch dressing :D).

The mushrooms sound great! I should try that.

Last year I was at my friend’s daughter’s birthday party. She picked a particular restaurant just because they have baked alaska, her favorite dessert. When we got to ordering dessert, the waiter said that they no longer served that. The daughter threw a freakin’ fit. I mean it was a real tantrum. It was embarassing.

We had to promise her that we’d throw her a baked alaska party soon.

We didn’t get around to it until New Years Eve, six months later. When I finally tried it, I had to tell the daughter that now I understood why she got so upset. It was the best thing I ever ate in my life.

I also found out today that cornstarch for acidic pudding or pie filling breaks down. Use arrow root if you want the filling to hold up.

Starch Thickeners