Mmmm… no. I’ve seen a LOT of old people who had children who didn’t agree with the medical assessment of thier parents/grandparents/whatever take the person into their homes rather than let them go to an evil evil nursing home.
Consequently the old person ends up in hospital with some massivly debilitating or life ending illness or condition that would have been easily prevented with the full time care provided in a high level care nursing home.
Since the nursing home that they liked has an opening early next month, the problem seems to be extending the assisted care arrangement for only a matter of a few days. That doesn’t sound unreasonable. But the social worker won’t come out of hiding to answer the question.
It would take at least that long for the assisted care facility to get a court order to have the elderly lady tossed out onto the sidewalk by the sheriff with kalhoun’s TV station’s cameras rolling. It’s not going to happen.
zenith, tell the assisted care facility what date you will be able to move her into the nursing facility. Leave a message for the social worker telling her the date also. Ask her to call you immediately if this is not satisfactory. Keep a record of the date and time that you called her.
I am not an attorney and I don’t know what the law is on this. I’m just speculating about what would satisfy most people in the situation.
Meanwhile, visit your mother-in-law daily if at all possible to be sure that she has everything that she needs. Assisted care faciities really aren’t responsible for some things that may be essential at this point.
Bless you. I know this is hard. It is one of the passages that people our age go through.
I can’t believe you are stupid enough to think that and yet coordinated enough to type it. You fucking dickwad. I hope you have kids that take you to an ER and leave you with no forwarding address.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
kaylasdad, that was by far one of the funniest things I have ever read on this board. Thanks for the laugh.
Just a thought, but if the social worker is hiding behind voicemail, perhaps a call to someone higher up the tree might help? Like the Director? (I don’t know what the U.S. equivalent is.)
“I am calling with regard to Ms X, whose case is being dealt with by Y. I’ve left n messages for Y and have yet to receive a response. The matter has become urgent because … Can you help?”
It was the *tone *he said it in, too. You could just imagine the straight face. I second this, kaylasdad!
Hmmmm, right, I guess that’s what I was saying. If she absolutely cannot live with the OP, then, “assisted living,” care, which is just what it says, is not an acceptable level of care either and a nursing home seems appropriate.
In most cases, assisted living is cheaper than nursing home care–until a person’s
physical or mental state starts deteriorating. As this occurs, and the person needs more asssistance than “tier one” calls for, the home provides greater assistance at greater cost.
At some point, the highest tier of assisted living approaches the cost of nursing care and, if the patient is on “private pay”, nothing need be done until the assisted living cost actually exceeds nursing care cost; but for those on public assistance, the policy is to move the client at some arbitrary point before the highest-tier assisted living cost equals nursing care cost. Where that point occurs is open to interpretation-- no two social workers can come up with a definition such as “when assisted living cost is equal to or greater than 90% nursing care”. Basically, it occurs whenever the bean counters feel it should and nobody but they are on a need-to-know basis.
My wife’s and my understanding was that no final determination would be made until after the Holidays and Erma’s birthday, that the announcement would be handled gently and tactfully, and that we’d get ample time to make other arrangements. We weren’t prepared for a Dec.19 determination that we had 10 calendar days, during Christmas Week–not 10 business days , but 10 calendar days, which were stretched to month’s end and no further when we protested. The social worker certainly did not indicate tat the news would be broken to Erma in the cold and cursory manner in which it was.
When the citizen promises to do something for the government by a given date, that promise must be kept, or there are legal consequences–up to and including incarceration-- if those promises are not kept. This is definitely not a 2-way street; the government thinks nothing of lying to the citizenry and the lying some more when it says, “Nobody else ever complains about this so it must be your problem, not ours.”
They expect respect despite their utter disrepute.