Middle-aged fat broad gleefully shaves head. Feels like the proverbial million bucks.

I’ve had long hair for the vast majority of my life, very long (See Stoid On TV a long time ago with her hair looking very pretty in hopes it would distract from the startling size of her ass) But when the thought first came to me last night “I should just shave it off” every cell in my body vibrated with YES!! Yes! Yes!

I did not have the slightest hesitation, quite the opposite; I couldn’t get it done fast enough. I cannot remember anything being so clearly, irrefutably correct for me to do, so in another first, I did it without breathing a word to a single soul. Which is almost beyond belief, seeing as how I have to hash out every possible angle of what to have for breakfast.

I had planned to do it myself, but ended up at a barbershop 4 blocks away - I am a familiar figure to the barbers because I bike past them sitting outside all the time with my dog, and we nod, but this was the first time we’d really spoken.

It was without question the most thrilling and satisfying tonsorial experience of my entire life. I doubt I will ever let it grow out again.

It had and has nothing much to do with my appearance being attractive or not attractive and changing my hair to change my degree of attractiveness. In fact I approached it pretty convinced that it would not be particularly flattering at all on my old fat face. I sent my sister just a photo of my cut hair itself without telling her what I had done, and she asked me who did I kill? I knew immediately: the person whose skin I stopped fitting into quite a long time ago. I had been like a snake whose skin has separated, but who never sheds it, instead trying to fit in what it will never fit into again.

The story my appearance is telling now is the true one - I am myself again, and that is what matters to me. I am liberated. It is excellent.

(Not to mention the fact that it is crazy cool and comfortable, and I’ve just been given back tons of time and money to spend on far more interesting things than my stupid hair…although I think I might start to play a little, now that anything I do can be gone in a month. Maybe I’ll dye it purple or shave a peace sign into it…)

Now here’s the kicker: everyone seems to love it. In fact, one of the barbers, 20 years my junior, asked for my number, something that has not happened in more than 5 years. I consider that the little bow the universe tied on it telling me that of course I did exactly the right thing.

Clearly, the only response possible is:

Lookout, it’s a skinhead. :slight_smile:

I’m with Beowolf. Pics please!

A friend of mine who used to have long hair, has been wearing it less than an inch long for several years now. She lost it all during chemo treatments and swore she’d never wear it long again. It suits her down to the ground.

You go, girl!

I have a 5-10 year cycle of short/long hair. It was almost to my waist when I had my hysterectomy last year, then I took clippers to it, taking it to less than an inch. I felt like I was celebrating my androgyny! It was very liberating to be free of norms and not care about what someone else would think. I think it makes me more accepting of myself.

Peace

Yay, mid-life crisis!

I’ve currently got hair down to my butt and it’s time for me to cut it again - I keep threatening to either go crewcut or shave it all off but I’m pretty sure I don’t really mean it myself. But who knows?

Congrats! I’ve gone from long to short and back again a couple times! It’s such a great feeling to scrub your head in the shower, not have to use conditioner, and towel dry your hair. For the first few days, I found myself flinging imaginary hair back with my hands, or reaching up to put it behind my ear and nothing was there. Silly. It’s getting long again now. I love it but it’s such a pain.

I love this, seriously.

I’m also a middle-aged broad and have been toying with cutting all my hair off (not shaved, but short-short.) I’ve had crew-cut short hair a couple of times in the past and it’s marvellously freeing not to even think about hair, or ever have a “bad hair day.”

You were lovely in that game show. How much did you win?

I cut mine from bra-band to super-short pixie about a year and a half ago, now letting it grow again a little (just because of contrariness, I’ll admit*). My sister in law took one look at me. Stared. Left the room looking like she was going to get Grandpa’s claymore from the mantel. Came back with my first ID pic, age 4, and said “you look the same! You look the fucking same!”

  • I don’t think my mother will ever understand that the more she asks “when are you going to the hairdresser?” and the more instructions she gives me on exactly which one I must go to and what must I specifically ask for, the more likely I am to not set foot into one. And no, it’s not reverse psychology, when I wanted to let my hair grow for First Communion she refused to let me do it until Dad stepped in.

I’m glad you’re happy.
Being an elderly male, I too am going to be bald soon!

Shaved heads look awesome on women, I think :slight_smile: Glad you are happy with your decision.

Short hair is much more time consuming IME. When my hair was long, if I was not having a good hair day, I would just pull it back in a ponytail. Now that it’s short, I have to do something with it every day. It gets weird from sleeping and you can’t just comb it out or pull it back. When long, I washed my hair about twice a week because it would take hours to dry. Now it’s daily. Such a pita and harder on your hair.

I’ve never had super-long hair; currently mine is fairly short - collar length or so. But when it was very short, I did little to it. Just towel-dried it after my morning shower and pushed it into place with my fingers. If it went a funny shape, just a little water and there you go. I didn’t even bother with conditioner. My hair is thick but very fine so the only reason I use conditioner is to keep it from frizzing out but that’s not a factor when it’s really short.

This thread is inspiring me to go the crew-cut route again!

I’m glad you’re happy. Wanna go bowling? :slight_smile:

Dye rainbow stripes! Then take a picture. :slight_smile:

I got a super butch haircut a couple years back. I liked it a lot short, but now it’s long again and I like that a lot too (what can I say, I’m in love with myself). I never went so far as a close shave, but it’s always awesome to try something new. And even if you don’t like it–it’s hair, it keeps growing back!

I lopped everything off when I was 19. I kept the decision secret and just went out and did it one Saturday afternoon.

I was driven by two things. First, Georgia summers are no joke and my big, woolly hair was a giant heat sponge. I was just getting into the outdoorsy thing, and having a sweaty neck all the time was slowing me down. Second, I had bad trichotillomania. I had a big bald spot at the crown of my head that I could barely cover up, every book I owned was chockful of hair, and I really felt like the habit was driving me crazy. I needed to do something drastic.

At first I got it cut into a curly fro. But I realized it wasn’t quite short enough to keep me from picking at it, so I went for the buzz cut.

It was scary and wonderful. Those first few days, I vacillated between regret and exhilaration.

I also felt like a rebel for the first time. I’d spent my whole life hearing people talk about my hair as if it was a person living on the top of my head. It was a way for people to pigeon-hole me and imagine me in their preferred image, in doing so obscuring my actual identity. So chopping it all off was me telling everyone to look at the real me, dammit. And it worked. For the first time, people stopped confusing me for my twin sister. People began to notice that our faces actually are quite different, and then it dawned on them that we are different people, with different preferences and aims in life. Moreover, I became the racial, sexual, and gender cipher I’ve always felt I am.

Seventeen years later, my hair is still short. I did let it grow out a little, but the hair-pulling re-emerged so I had to nip that in the bud.

Inna Minit, it has to be really short for some people to not have to fuss with it. I’m one of them. I wear it short, but it’s been years since I’ve worn it no-fuss short. Now that I finally can predict how my hair will behave, I get away with minimum fuss most days.

Never let it be said that I am not accommodating. Let the judgment commence!

I thought you said you cut it short.

It’s much longer than mine…

:stuck_out_tongue: