Holy shit, I work at a gas station with a big, vibrant, easily read sign, and bitches keep coming in, saying, “Why for da pump say $2.25? Da sine say $2.19!”
Well, assnugget, the sign also says “CASH $2.19, CREDIT $2.25,” in big-ass blue letters. Really, it’s not that hard. You don’t even have to expend the energy to move your neck muscles to see it…
Joe
But what if I cleaned them right off the stove some day? What then? Ever think of that, smart guy?
Yeah, I know, me cleaning the stove is not that likely.
It’s a regular sausagefest in there!
I found this: Crime and Public Transport on JSTOR
It admits that there is not a lot, but maybe the actual article has some cites you can chase.
There is also this one:
http://www3.interscience.wiley.com/journal/119833118/abstract?CRETRY=1&SRETRY=0
I am fat. Quite fat.
I can still take a walk without weezing but really Im over 40 on a BMI so I’m FAT.
Normally I quite enjoy beeing fat. I dont have to wonder if that girl smiling at me might be intrested because… you know Im fat, and shes not.
Anyway.
Burger King, why the hell did you decide on furniture that only medium persons can use? You know you cater to a king size crowd. So theres me eating my whopper with my stomach stuck between my spine and the (fastened to a floor) table.
Bastards. Now Ill have to use the drive thru and eat in my car.
You know, there are, in my estimation, two types of people in this world - those that prefer making forward progress, and dumbasses. I was surrounded by drivers of the second type today.
Rule #1: When the light turns green, it means go.
Rule #2: Preferably within the time it takes to cycle back to red.
Rule #3: If you reading your Chicago Tribune is impeding your progress with rules 1 and 2, put the damn paper down and DRIVE YOU JERK!
Rule #4: If rules 1 - 3 are giving you trouble, stay off of whatever street I am on because I’m starting to get really really annoyed. This commute is going to kill either me, or bystanders someday.
Ran into the opposite problem last week. In the left-turn lane on a busy two-way street. Lady in front of us pulls out some…and then some more…and stops…and the light turns red…and she sits there. We nearly had to pull around her to make our own turn. Fortunately, she was oblivious but not deaf. HONK
This morning I awoke to the news that it had snowed in the night. Joy! There was still snow on the grass, and apparently some ice on the bridges across Lake Washington, but the roadways here in town were bare and wet. Trying to be prudent, I checked Metro’s website this morning and it didn’t indicate any problems with my bus, but I figured I’d leave a little early anyway, so I left around 8:25. My first and only class today starts at 9:30, and the ride is normally 20-30 minutes.
I stood outside for a fucking hour while buses failed to go by.
I saw two Miatas pass by. If Miatas can be driven (on the bare, wet roadway, mind) I would think that someone could manage to get a bus going.
At 9:30 I gave up, because I didn’t feel like being 30 minutes late to an hour class and then having to try to get back home to get ready for work. I should have just stayed in bed; I could have used the extra sleep, as I work until 11pm tonight. Now my toes are numb, my legs are cold, and you could store cuts of meat on my ass.
Did I mention I have a test in this class tomorrow?
So it is resolved: When it snows more than a micrometer, Metro cannot find their own ass with two hands, a flashlight, and a detailed USFS topographical map. (Protip: look for the deep depression between two higher elevations.)
[Disclaimer: The probable reason no buses came is because earlier none were able to get to the end of the line, so there were none to come back toward the center. Our professor drops our lowest test score so I’m not too worried about this test. I’m chilly and annoyed because I almost stayed in bed but decided to be responsible. At least the dog is happy.]
You and me both, baby.
I was driving behind someone who will probably be killed in her car some day - we went through a series of green lights, and at each one, she turned on her left turn indicator (after the light turned green, of course - don’t want to tip anyone off about what you’re doing so they can adjust their own driving), waited through the heavy traffic until the light turned yellow, then decided not to turn left and went through the intersection, while the rest of the traffic she had backed up sat and waited through the red. She did this for about three lights in a row (I’m guessing she was looking for an intersection or she’s a sociopath - hard to say which one). I’m not sure a jury would have convicted someone who killed her on the spot after doing this for a couple of lights.
This is my mini-rant for the day - check out the weather for my city today (paying special attention to the “feels like” section). WAAAAAAAH! 
My rant du jour is about the banks. Now, granted, they are in the business of separating my money from me and I’ve come to expect them to jerk me around at every opportunity. So it wasn’t too big a surprise when I got a letter a couple days ago from CIBC informing me that they were jacking up all their services charges as well as inventing some new ones. Like hitting me with a fee if I let an account go inactive?!? You’re charging me for NOT making you process anything? You fuckers. Well that bit of news pretty much decided for me that I’ll be closing my checking account with them, after 25+ years of maintaing that account with them.
So then, this morning, I open another letter from CIBC, this one being my line of credit statement. And included in the envelope is a notice telling me that they will be increasing my interest rate by 1% starting in April. My current rate is prime plus 2. So essentially, they’re increasing the fixed portion of my interest rate by 50%!!! Holy shit! I realize CIBC was the stupidest of the Canadian banks in terms of jumping hip-deep in the US sub-prime mortgage debacle, but am I now being expected to help you bastards recover from your own fucking mistakes?!? Not cool.
And finally, as I’m driving in to work this morning, after seeing that letter, I hear on the radio that CIBC is reporting higher-than-expected profits for the latest quarter. So apparently they’ve already squared their shit away but are still feeling compelled to jam their customers, you know, just to be sure.
Well, fuck you, soon-to-be-former bank. Little did you know that the company I’m working for is still doing pretty well and the dividend cheque I got last week is more than enough to pay off the line of credit in it’s entirety. And then I’ll simply be using the services of one of the other banks I’m currently doing business with – someone who is slightly less interested in ass-raping me every time I turn around. Time to sit down with an agent at ATB and see what else they’re prepared to do for me…
Meeting at work. No raises this year. Bother.
It could be worse, though. I could have been laid off in November…
Um… that’s not headed in my direction, is it? I walked outside today to a wonderful spacious mild day with pale sunshine and the snow melting and the water running and a “this could be the beginning of spring!” feeling in the air.
And I’m trying to get through the remains of the winter without replacing my parka. Because it’s falling apart and all the stores have already moved on to spring.
I understand, retailers. I know you want to get people thinking about the next new thing. But look outside. It’s still cold out. Did it ever occur to you that people might actually need to buy winter coats at the end of winter as well?
First of all, as someone who spent 8 years in southern Ontario, I can assure you that it is not cold out there. Minus five is not cold (actually, looks like you’re up over 0 today!). 
Secondly, a quick peek at your forecast suggests that the worst of our current cold front will miss you, so its all good. 
Ooh, that reminds me of another mini-rant - ice-melting salt in the less than 50 pound bag size has disappeared from the stores here - BEFORE the thawing/re-freezing season. Goddammit, if I’d known they were going to take away something I needed three months before I would stop needing it, I would have stocked up!
But I did get a lovely new bathing suit a couple of weeks ago.
Yay! I’ve been putting a really thick and friendly sweater on under a lighter coat. I’l like to continue doing this until it gets warm.
I’ve often thought that having to plow, shovel, salt, etc, our roads and sidewalks was an indication that society is incompletely adapted to winter.
:: barely restrains impulse to ask for pics 
::
I have a few from the past few weeks.
Ok, I know we all get settled into the flight and it’s a hassle to undo that seatbelt and all, but when the flight attendant comes by and points out that there are entire empty rows at the front of the plane, why the hell don’t you move? You had one magazine and a small purse and were sitting on the aisle. I had two backpacks with 5 laptops in them and was by the window. Which of us should have moved? This happened on two separate flights on my last trip. What the hell people? I have enough trouble flying on a plane that is not big enough for me to stand up in, do you really have to make it more difficult by sticking to that seat no matter what? I assure you that if my presence next to you is somehow reassuring because you’re nervous about flying, this behavior will only result in me being sure to be unhelpful to you in case of any sort of emergency. Idiots.
As anyone with small kids probably knows, the toy turn-over rate is huge with little ones. They’ll probably stop playing with something after a few months. Leaving us with lots of toys that were hardly played with and new stuff coming in all the time. So we donate. Partially because we can use the tax write off, but more because I’ve been in tight financial situations where shopping at the thrift store was the only way to get anything. So by donating toys, everyone benefits…I get rid of stuff I don’t need and teach my kids about helping others, the charity organization will receive some money when they sell these items, and a family that is less fortunate has the opportunity to get some nice toys at a good price. Except of course now none of the charities near us will accept toys as donations. Seems that with all the lead safety issues now they can’t afford the equipment to test all these toys, so they won’t take them. I actually don’t want you to spend a ton of money that can be better used helping someone on a piece of gear that costs a great deal of money and probably takes special training. But there has to be a better solution than just saying “nope, not going to take any of that anymore”. You can’t post a disclaimer? Make each customer sign something? Really the only good option you have is to tell me to throw this all away? Please, make it more difficult for people to do the right thing…especially in this economy. I will find someone somewhere that will accept these donations, but I love how you make it hard for me to be a good person. Thanks a lot.
Atrael, IANAParent, but I took a class once…try dividing the kid’s toys into thirds, and putting 1/3 in a box, and 1/3 in another box. When the kids get bored with what they’ve got, get one of the boxes out and trade stuff. Obviously some toys have to stay permanently out, but the young ones will forget in the 2-6 months it takes the toys to cycle, and Hey! New Stuff!
On to my rant… Dude! Anything written onto a public message board is just that: Public. Don’t be a whiny little bitch when you get taken to task in real life for what you posted! If you need to vent that bad, use this board or someplace that at least has a pretense of anonymity! Damn!
Girls between the ages of 18 and 22: Your eyeliner needs to be taken away and destroyed. You all look like racoons. You look like someone has punched you in both of your eyes every single day. Stop it immediately.
Co-worker: Can you stop your fanboy squeeing and do some frickin’ work?
I could complain how I’m so sick of moving snow around, but I’m afraid I’ll be punched by someone sick of people complaining about being sick of snow, so I’ll rant about this minor thing instead:
Why is it that when I use the cable remote to change the channel, I need to push the up button to get to the next higher channel, but when I look at the digital listings I need to push the down button to get the listing for the next higher channel? Is it so fucking difficult to stick to one direction when designing these stupid remote controls?
Toy Libraries are also quite benificently inclined towards you
Chuckholes, pot holes and craters made wider and deeper and more dangerous by the rain that is washing away buttloads of snow and exposing deficits in the pavement that threaten to swallow my Beetle whole. And the additional danger and hi drama of having speeding cars and trucks careening all over the road to avoid the crater like obstacles in their lane. Gotta hole the size of the marinara (sic) trench in your lane? I feel your pain, but slow the frick down and stay outta my lane cuz I will chicken you out into the ditch!