Minor Rant, but i'm still pissed.

It’s not very hard to get a ladder and cut off the branches of the tree. Clean those up then go back up the ladder and chop up off the top section of the tree. Then you cut that up. Finally then you cut the rest of the tree down.

Nice easy small sections none of which can hit someone’s house.

If you’re not sure how to cut a tree so it falls the right way… go to a chainsaw repair place and flit with the guy who runs it.

Odds are for a home cooked and some eyelash batting you’ll get what you want :wink:


Please don’t go telling people who are unfamiliar with chainsaws and don’t have the proper safety equipment to start using them.

My father (here we go again) worked as a woodsman for years and still managed to cut himself badly with a chainsaw on the thigh (through chainsaw pants) - though not as badly as my best friend’s father who cut his chest and shoulder deeply when his saw kicked back. Both people working with the things for decades, and noone I would trust more with them.

Unless you’re suggesting she do all this with a hand saw? :slight_smile:

I aggree with venoma. and Libertarian ? How would being in the marines help me learn how to cut down a tree ? Now if you could reccomend a female friendly lumberjack school…

My insurance doesn’t cover me if I cut down my palm trees and something goes wrong.

If I pay a shitload of money to a tree surgeon, his insurance covers any damage. It’s one of the most idiotic things I’ve heard in a while to suggest that someone inexperienced with tree felling just gets out there and gets on with it. Gender doesn’t matter either.

How big is this tree? And how close to a house or something that would be hurt by a falling tree?

A general method of cutting a tree (as suggested by CRoex) is to climb the tree and remove branches on the way down. Tie a rope toward the top of the tree, attach said rope to a come-along at another tree (away from the house), pull and cut.

It’s hazardous for a modest tree. Flat dangerous for a large tree. A fair sized tree weighs a few tons. Very spectacular when they fall; sort of like dropping a bus from 50 feet.

I cut down the tree in my front yard (read: overgrown hedge bush). It was only 30 feet tall, but took three adults to bring it down safely, as it was just 5 feet from my home. I don’t recommend taking on an acutal TREE if you don’t know what you are doing.
However, in my area, there are ambitious young men who will cut down stuff in exchange for the wood. If you have a wooded lot, they will cut down the trees, uproot the stumps, and regrade the lot in exchange for the privilege of hauling the wood off. Quite a lucrative business.

apricot had a good idea about people cutting it down for the wood, I’veheard that as wel. Unfortunately , it’s a pine tree and with all the sap, i’m not sure what good it would do for someone. ( not as firewood anyway)

Dang! And here I thought I had my own Pit thread.

Vincent D’Onofrio, maybe?

Sorry to burst your bubble, Minor irritant. If you are really that desperate , I’ll pit you for getting your hopes up too easily.

Ya know, it was only recently that I made the connection that he was “Private Pyle” In Full Metal Jacket. I always just thought of him as “Edgar” from MIB, and now that Criminal Intent guy.

This made me laugh.

How about you sell your computer to help earn the money? I mean, if the tree’s going to fall on your, or your neighbor’s, house and all… perhaps it’s worth it.

I dont think it’s gotten that bad. If she really gets horrible , i can loan something off my parents ( last resort only). I think i would sell my kidney before my computer though.

Flowerchild, if you live in Phoenix, e-mail me and I will come and cut down the tree for you. And yes, I am an experienced tree cutter. I did it for a living when I was younger.

Thanx for the kind offer Datoad, but I’m pretty far from pheonix ( like a thousand miles)

Just make sure whoever does it for you is insured! There are even many tree doctors who arent insured. According to Clark Howard that is.