*coldfire: I would have screwed ya for 9 bucks too, if you were yelling at me like that. *
Oops. Somehow that bold code got in my post. From now on <small>I’ll whisper. Is this better?<small> 
Restaurant (not bar) with too much background noise: my Rusty Nail came back as a Fuzzy Navel. I am always careful to over EE NUN CI ATE when I order, now.
Tom~
A nun she ate ?
Hot damn ! And where was this, exactly ?
Coldfire
“You know how complex women are”
- Neil Peart, Rush (1993)
Coldfire: A nun she ate ?
Hot damn ! And where was this, exactly ?
<small>Boy, you’re a real smartalec today! Something in the water? :)</small>
AWB, a Rush-lover too.
<hr width=“100%” height=“2”>
I looked in the mirror today/My eyes just didn’t seem so bright
I’ve lost a few more hairs/I think I’m going bald - Rush
Not really a waiter story (like many before, so I figured all food service is fair game). A few years back Pizza Hut advertised Steak Lovers’ Pizza, with what appeared to be slices of steak. Being victims of advertising, the wife and I order one. Delivery guy drops off, we pay, he leaves. We open box to discover one pizza with italian sausage, nothing else. We call, they say “Sorry, we were out of steak”!! Free pizza.
AWB:
Nobody can make you tip. A restuarant policy that breaks the law is not enforable.
While I usually am sympathetic to the cause of the server, when you get a bad one, you under no obligation to tip, and next time, feel free to tell the manager that you will pay the bill only, and that (s)he can feel free to call the police if (s)he is so-inclined.
Yer pal,
Satan
A group of coworkers and I went out to lunch at a fairly nice restuarant in the area - reputed to be a great steak place. There was probably 20 of us - and we had about an hour to kill.
It took well over 2 hours. The wait for the food was 45 minutes. The drinks were mixed up. Some of the orders weren’t right. Some of the food was cold. When the bill came, it totalled near $500, and a “mandatory gratuity for groups of 6 or more” of like 17% or something had been automatically added.
Well, the guy who treated - one of the managers (dont’ get excited - he expenses it as a staff meeting and gets paid back) - called the restaurant manager and said that there was NO WAY he was paying that tip. Although he had a bit of a confrontation with the restaurant manager and the waiter, they couldn’t force him to either.
Sometimes you just gotta get in someone’s face…
“If there’s anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now.”
True story.
A friend of the family was driving down to the family home in Italy. He stops by a roadside cafe with his wife and kids for a late lunch (after 2:00 PM). In Europe restaurants are usually only open during meal times, so the waiter tells him “sorry, we’re out of food.” Our friend says “can’t you at least make us a plate of spaghetti?” The waiter comes back and says “The chef says we still have some spaghetti left.” The friend then decides to visit the restroom. The pathway to the restroom goes next to a kitchen door, and through a window in the door he says the waiter carefully picking out cooked spaghetti from the top of the trash can.
Needless to say, they skipped lunch that day.
La franchise ne consiste pas à dire tout ce que l’on pense, mais à penser tout ce que l’on dit.
H. de Livry
Went to a local place called Otto & Thibodeaux’s on the recommendation of a friend, who was in the mood for fried clams. At the time I was watching what I ate, so I ordered grilled chicken. What arrived, after a long wait, was fried chicken. I was starving and pressed for time, so I decided to eat it anyway and not make a lengthy fuss. A few bites in, I realize that the centers of BOTH pieces of chicken are still quite raw.
We called the waiter and pointed out the problem. He apologized and hustled the plate back to the chicken, taking also the second plate with my baked potato on it and thus depriving me of my only chance of getting anything to eat.
Minutes thereafter, we had to leave. They didn’t charge me for my ‘meal’, but then again, I didn’t get much of a chance to eat anything. The server promised me a free meal on my next visit. I haven’t gone back; why the hell would I?
To Cat Rimbaud: OK, I was not quite accurate. The place was a small Mexican restaurant in north Redondo Beach, CA–now defunct. My mother and stepfather, and older brother, ordered coffee; I’ve been the nonconformist in the family and I was the only one to order hot tea. That’s the way I am.
On the subject of tipping: This bit from Hollywood Squares, about 1973
Q. What is a good way to show that the service was lousy?
PAUL LYNDE: Whistling during the eulogy.
(actual answer: not leaving a tip.)
Arnold said:
In Europe restaurants are usually only open during meal times
In Italy and France, yes. And then mainly the smaller ones. Nothing different from the US, I think. Sometimes there are also separate lunch and dinner menus, so you can get into debates for trying to order a sandwich after 14:00, say, at 14:02
“Falling Down” comes to mind…
I wouldn’t say preparing lunch out of a garbage bin is a Euro thing though 
Coldfire
“You know how complex women are”
- Neil Peart, Rush (1993)
Actually, if you stop in most any small village in Switzerland and go to the local “bistro” or “cafe”, you won’t be able to get food unless it’s breakfast, lunch time or dinnertime. And when they do have food, they typically will have two or three dishes to choose from.
La franchise ne consiste pas à dire tout ce que l’on pense, mais à penser tout ce que l’on dit.
H. de Livry
Switzerland isn’t the typical example of a European country if you ask me… no offence
These people can be very weird… slightly xenophobic (they’ve got a right extremist government now), and generally quite dull. Just observing… dunno about the food though. Oh, and the language (Retoromanic, i.e.) is just incomprehendible !! Mind you, I DO speak 2 of the 3 languages that are integrated into it, and it STILL doesn’t make sense
Coldfire
“You know how complex women are”
- Neil Peart, Rush (1993)
Sweet, sweet mundanity.
The burger joint near my office is an order-at-the counter kind of place, so the “service” isn’t a waiter problem.
I still go there for takeout as a lark because they staple your order in a paper bag before they hand it to you. I have NEVER gotten the correct bag, not in three years.
They also never have forks. There’s a two-section utensil bin with spoons and knives, but no forks.
“It ain’t no sin to be glad you’re alive”
Bruce Springsteen
I was at a nice restaurant but whoever designed it must have been on something. The aisles were so narrow that even a very thin person had a hard time walking through them.
Anyway, there was a waiter that was carrying a tray with 4 really big glasses of water. Someone bumped him and the WHOLE TRAY fell right into my lap! He turned red, said, “ohmigod!” and kept apologizing. That water was sooo cold but I felt sorry for him so I didn’t yell (not that I was thrilled about it). I know it wasn’t his fault. And I didn’t push for a free meal because I got the best service I ever had after that on account of everyone there was kissing my butt. My family said I was nuts for not yelling at him.
MaryAnn
The more you complain, the longer God lets you live.
MaryAnn…your sig…you’re a typing contradiction.
I once worked as a waitress in a Friendly’s restaurant in a major college town. During homecoming it was absolutely nuts. One time one of the waiters was accosted by a big-football-playing-type guy from one of his tables, who was demanding to know where his food was. Greg replied to this by telling him, “Look, buddy, you’re eating at Friendly’s, and I’m working here. The future doesn’t look too bright for either of us, so, sit down and I’ll bring your food when its ready.” The kicker is that the guy laughed! And sat down! Greg was one of those disgustingly charming people that can say anything and get away with it. :o
This isn’t much of a tale, but what the heck.
I was walking home from seeing a movie, and I was hungry for chicken. I passed a fast food joint that had written all over the windows, walls and door ‘chicken, hot chicken, chicken n chips’ etc. Everywhere.
I go in, and order me some chicken.
And I get the reply: “No, no. We no sell chicken here. No chicken.”
I stand there stunned and confused.
“You maybe want somethin’ else?”
Well, I left. Never to return. Totally bizarre…
-PIGEONMAN-
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