Note: The following is (mostly) not lighthearted.
I’m a pretty good guy. People call me sweet and whatnot. But I’ve got problems. I dont know why, where they came from, or why they persist, but they’re there.
In and of themselves, these are not big problems. They’re little, nagging inconsistancies that I have, little deals, nothing to worry about. They sometimes annoy the people around me, but everyone has little annoyances about them.
However, they become a much bigger deal when they affect my relationship. The SO (who I’m referring to as Ramoth from now on, understandable to anyone who’s read the Pern books) is quite disturbed when they crop up, and for very good reason. For, as small as the problems themselves may be, they can combine and create quite monsterous disturbances.
So here I am. As I’ve noted before, it often helps me to talk about the things that trouble me. It helps me straighten them out in my head, something I sometimes have trouble with. The advantage of doing it here is that I can also receive some of the most positive, intelligent feedback in the world. You guys are great, so I hope to draw on the vast pool of knowledge and experience here.
My problems, the ones I’m referring to here, are mainly threefold.
My head is incredibly disorganised. I cannot remember details, I can’t put the pieces of the puzzle together, I often don’t realize things even when they’re biting me in the ass.
I live my life day to day, moment to moment even. I don’t plan things. All in all not so bad, but with an SO who likes to know where she’s going when, my reluctance to plan anything becomes a problem. This also means that most of the time I sit around until I think of something to do, which means that Ramoth is the one initiating outings about 98% of the time. This gets to her, and I can see why.
(and this is the major one): I’m very bad at giving straight answers. When I mean ‘yes’, I’ll say ‘Maybe later’. Or something similar. It works fine in my head, but to the people listening it’s very cryptic and they don’t get my implied ‘yes’. This, obviously, can be quite the problem. Most people simply call me on it, and they can get a straight answer sooner or later. It’s different in a relationship. She dosn’t quite understand the difficulty I have here, and it ends up causing many, MANY misunderstandings and hurt feelings.
In short, I have my dumbass moments.
These are my troubles. The first is somewhat minor, the second cause’s problems from time to time. The third is the biggie.
I already feel like I understand this thing better having typed it out.
Now, with a better understanding, I need to SOLVE said problems. The second and third are what I really need to work on. I’ll be keeping my mind on it, trying to catch myself when I do things like this, and I’m going to get my friends in on it too, to give me a blast when I do it. I’ll be checking back here, too, seeing what you all have to say, and that’ll help me remind myself of it too.
Hopefully I can improve because of this, and render the problems moot. Not only improving my relationship with Ramoth, but really, making myself a lot less annoying sometimes. That’s the goal, baby.
So hey, encourage me! Tell me stories. Give me tips. Slap me on the ass, throw me a beer, just get me moving in any way you can think of (I’m feeling a little more lighthearted now). I appreciate you all listening (reading) me, it helps, and whatever you’ve got to say; Thanks in advance.
[sub]Just, no cyberhugs if you please. Though, feel free to throw me a virtual beer.[/sub]