I’m outside enjoying the nice day and watching the little house finches build their yearly nest in the eve of our house when the phone rings. Without looking at the CID I answered the cordless. I’m greeted by a happy fellow with a thick eastern accent by the name of Jack Turner. He wants to sell me nice a vacation package. Well, not really a vacation package. More of a vacation co-op/membership/club/bad idea.
I have this new hobby where I act like a mentally challenged person and record the whole affair and place it on my webpage, but I wasn’t expecting this call and I was outside, so I just went with it.
So Jack tells me I’ve “won” a trip to San Francisco (airfare and accommodations) as well as a digital camera PLUS another bonus package of 4 nights accommodations in Vancouver BC -but I have to listen to their 90 minute presentation. Ok, I said, sure thing. Sign me up.
I’ve gotten a ton of these offers before. You go to their sales pitch, someone then sits down at a table with you and gives you the hard sell. They keep knocking the price down, and down, and down. You continue to say no to them so they fetch someone to “sign off” on your paperwork. Really that person is just the other half of the tag-team sales super-duo. Sales person number two knocks the price down a few more times. Finally they realize you aren’t going to buy anything so they reluctantly give you the prizes.
You see, I ALWAYS attend these things because they pay for my short vacations. So far they’ve paid for a trip to San Francisco, Orlando, two places in Oregon and it seems like a few other things as well. When you think about it, why would I pay for their vacation package when they’re always willing to give me vacations for free?
Outside of airfare and motel coupons, I’ve gotten crappy TV’s, cheap digital cameras, and all kinds of other junk not worth keeping. It’s kind of fun. It’s another little hobby of mine.
I’ve also learned a way to avoid their hard sell – I just say I have two large dogs that go everywhere with me. I tell them it’s very hard to find someone to take care of these dogs because one is quite old and has special needs and can not be kept in a shelter. Not one of these vacation membership places allow dogs unless you’re blind (which I’m not). They can never think of a good argument so I get my free vacation, TV, camera or whatever with very little hassle.
So there you go, a little tip from me to you.
Anyway…
I still couldn’t get over my new buddy Jack and his thick accent. So I said “Man, I couldn’t believe how bad traffic was today. Do you have bad traffic in your country?”
Of course these guys are trained to tell you they are in LA or Chicago or some town in the states.
“Well sir, to tell you something” he says “I’m in New York”
“New York? Really? Oh man. Your commute home will be a nightmare… what with all that,. Umm… SNOW you got today.”
(Of course, weather.com says it didn’t snow in New York today.)
He let’s out a nervous chuckle.
“Um, yeah. Heh heh. It was snowing very much sir.”
“So Jack, tell me, how many inches did you get today. I heard it was like 6 or 7.”
“Well sir, how can I tell you how much? It is very much I can say for sure.”
“Now Jack, you wouldn’t be lying to me would you? Are you REALLY in New York?”
Enter another nervous chuckle from Jack.
I didn’t really feel like pushing Jack on the issue as I wanted my cheap digital camera and free airfare to San Francisco to hook up with a friend down there. But something tells me he wasn’t really in New York.
I am Jack’s annoying cold call.
