Mormons

[dreeder]

In a polygamous sect, like the Mormons of old, what the hell happened to the excess men given that populations are normally pretty much 50:50 male:female?

Was there a whole sub-culture of gay Mormon men we’re just not told about?

[Lynn_Bodoni]

There are some polygynous communities today, and the excess males are known as Lost Boys. These boys are expelled during their teenage years. Since they’ve generally been raised in an insular community, and they are taken to a big city and dropped off with basically the clothes on their backs, they have to adjust to a new lifestyle without much in the way of resources.

http://thehopeorg.org/boys.html

[dangermom]

In the old days of Mormon polygamy, the practice just wasn’t all that widespread. Few men had a whole lot of wives, some had two or three, but the majority of marriages were the usual kind. There don’t seem to have been a lot of single men around though (is my impression, though really I know more about the women and am not a historian). You could always marry a non-Mormon woman–or the other way 'round, that wasn’t uncommon–but anyway the LDS religion has always seemed to attract a few more women than men.

Things were pretty fluid back then. People joined up, or left, or came back, or married outside the faith, or got divorced. Polygamous sects that make the news nowadays are much more controlling and isolated than the originals were. There are also modern polygamous people who don’t make the news because they don’t act like that. I don’t know much of anything about modern polygamy though.

[Bartman]

I think dangermom has it right.

It wasn’t that common even among the Mormons. Polygamy was mostly practiced among the leadership. The rank and file were most likely to only have a single spouse. And while Brigham Young may have had dozens of wives, the more common arrangement even for the polygamists was more like Apostle Francis Lyman who had 2 wives or Presiding Bishop Charles Nibley who had 3.

Then there were always more women converting than men. So there was a surplus of available of brides. And the habit of sending men in their late teens early twenties off to other countries for several years on missions, tended to work this gap a bit further. Among the 19th century Mormons, men tended to marry much later than women. So basically a women who lived to 80 would likely be married for 60 or more years of that. A man might only be married for 50 years. That difference could be picked up by the polygamists. It was not unusual for a polygamist to pick up older widows as well as younger brides. About a quarter of Brigham Young’s wives were 50 years old or older, and plenty more were in their 40s.

[medstar]

@Bartman

I think dangermom has it right.

It wasn’t that common even among the Mormons. Polygamy was mostly practiced among the leadership. The rank and file were most likely to only have a single spouse. And while Brigham Young may have had dozens of wives, the more common arrangement even for the polygamists was more like Apostle Francis Lyman who had 2 wives or Presiding Bishop Charles Nibley who had 3.

Then there were always more women converting than men. So there was a surplus of available of brides. And the habit of sending men in their late teens early twenties off to other countries for several years on missions, tended to work this gap a bit further. Among the 19th century Mormons, men tended to marry much later than women. So basically a women who lived to 80 would likely be married for 60 or more years of that. A man might only be married for 50 years. That difference could be picked up by the polygamists. It was not unusual for a polygamist to pick up older widows as well as younger brides. About a quarter of Brigham Young’s wives were 50 years old or older, and plenty more were in their 40s.

This is the main problem I have with Warren Jeffs style of polygamy. If he wanted multiple wives, he should mandate that women weren’t to wed until at least 18 years old and older single women should be married and give their consent for their men’s younder wives. As it stands now, the older men have a stranglehold on the available females. The cult should also be responsible for setting up unneeded males with generous support until they’re able to provide for themselves.

[Stinky_Pete]

In the Mormon religion version that allows polygamy, before you could have a second wife you have to have reached a level of affluence to be able to support more wives and children. Also this version of Mormonism the, (how should I say it?), elite council of leaders will tell you if you are allowed to marry, and if you stay single too long they’ll arrange a marriage for you with the mate of their choice. Suprisingly this elite council of leaders always seems to be allowed multiple wifes, and the most beautiful and affluent girls are always assigned to be the wives of the elite councel members.

[TokyoBayer]

@dangermom

In the old days of Mormon polygamy, the practice just wasn’t all that widespread. Few men had a whole lot of wives, some had two or three, but the majority of marriages were the usual kind. There don’t seem to have been a lot of single men around though (is my impression, though really I know more about the women and am not a historian). You could always marry a non-Mormon woman–or the other way 'round, that wasn’t uncommon–but anyway the LDS religion has always seemed to attract a few more women than men.

As typical, this is incorrect. From this source.

Were there more women than men?
[. . . .]
This is simply not true. Population statistics for Utah from 1850 to 1950 (Caucasian only)

And goes on to give the actual statistics.

The article also provides other quotes backing this up, such as

In his 1943 book, Evidences and Reconciliations, Apostle John A. Widtsoe explained:

"Plural marriage has been a subject of wide and frequent comment. Members of the Church unfamiliar with its history, and many non-members, have set up fallacious reasons for the origin of this system of marriage among the Latter-day Saints.

The most common of these conjectures is that the Church, through plural marriage, sought to provide husbands for its large surplus of female members. The implied assumption in this theory, that there have been more female than male members in the Church, is not supported by existing evidence. On the contrary, there seem always to have been more males than females in the Church...

As for the myth that the practice was quite limited, From the pro-Mormon Encyclopedia of Mormonism references here

The precise number who participated in plural marriage is not known, but studies indicate a maximum of 20-25% of LDS adults were members of polygamist households. One third of the women of marriageable age and nearly all of the church leadership were involved in the practice.

PBS gives the percentage as between 20% to 30%. However, even with the slightly lower percentage in the EoM, the admission that one third of women were involved in polygamy means that there were a lot of men who would not be able to find wives.