Does it have to be film?
Because Joan Halloway makes me suck my breath in. I think the classic Achewood phrase (from Philippe) applies - “She’s so pretty, a dog barks!”
Christina Hendricks, not in her non-60s-Mad Men costume is a stunningly attractive woman. But that Mad Men character and dress just put her over the top for me. Ideal woman, IMO.
If TV’s a go, I really liked the ex-girlfriend of Colin Hanks’s character on “The Good Guys” (short-lived show – probably the last time I tuned into a TV except for an occasional SNL was to catch that one). I mean, I don’t ever meet women that pretty IRL. Not ever, not in cities, not in the hottest latest greatest nightclubs, not walking down the street. Maybe she’s not so cool IRL, but if it means I’m a shallow bastard so be it – she was extremely beautiful. Not just “good enough for movies” but seriously out of control beautiful.
I feel crummy about razzing on Bob Mitchum above – there was one good Family Guy thing about “in shape, outta shape guy,” though. I love his acting, especially in stuff like Angel Face and Out Of The Past, but he always seemed a bit chubby for me to understand that he probably was hot stuff for those into the dick. Maybe that’s an object lesson for those of us with an extra 20 lbs kicking around – be as cool as Bob Mitchum, and don’t not be cool.
All right, I saw some YouTube of Jenny Wade – she’s gorgeous, at the very height of beauty, but maybe I overstated the case a bit above. I would eat the pelt of a muskrat if she’d let me do things on her, though. Not meaning vomit up the pelt of a muskrat in her mouth, in a misinformed attempt to assert myself as the provider and feeder of the helpless, but meaning some other things on her. Maybe to her? With her? Yeah, that last one.
MINE MINE MINE. I just couldn’t get my head wrapped around her in that one scene. Good God.
And from a completely different (and, umm, healthier) area of my psyche:
Clementine (Kate Winslett) in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Could have hung out with her forever (or should I say Into Eternity???)
Oh, come on, Monica Belucci is stupendously gorgeous regardless of what she is doing. Those portrayals are attractive because Belucci is a priori one of the most beautiful women in the world. She isn’t doing anything different or special to make those particular roles stand out.
It’s awfully hard to top ScarJo in Lost in Translation. A true revelation.
And I have to say that godDAMN is Ryan Gosling a beautiful man. Watch “Crazy Stupid Love” if you want proof.
Jessica Lange in any role
Summer Glau in Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles.
Gotta love robo-babes.
Even if I was blind I’d say Howard Keel, as he was back in those glorious musicals of the 50’s.
He had killer looks and that voice, oh that voice! Even when, as an older man, he courted Miss Ellie on Dallas he was still good.
Jane Seymour’s Margarite Blakeney in The Scarlet Pimernel. A gorgeous woman at the absolute pinnacle of her beauty.
I have to agree with Legolas. Now that Bloom has had other roles, it’s obvious that there was something special about that man in elf gear. He was ethereal.
Paz Vega in Spanglish
Oh, but in Matrix 2 wit that coolness, she positively owns me. Yes, Belucci is tremendously beautiful, but as Persephone I find her most attractive.
Whoa.
Michelle Pfeiffer as Catwoman in Batman Returns. Meee-yow.
I’ll see that and raise it Michelle Pfeiffer in Fabulous Baker Boys.
My wife would agree with you there Orlando Bloom - Meh, Legolas - humanah humanah
Personally,
I loved Liv Tyler in LOTR (to keep on the theme),
A strange one, I really liked Renee Zellweger in Jerry McGuire, but not especially in anything else she’s done.
Elizabeth Shue in Adventures of Babysitting
Just as I was thinking all of the stunning characters I can think of are women, you give me this. A+
My response, aside from Brando being just perfect, is Anouk Amiée as Maddalena in “La Dolce Vita.” I know if I’m going to list someone from this film, the obvious choice is whatsherface played by Anita Ekberg, but every time Maddalena wasn’t on screen, I wanted her to be.
