I learned how to set up, fuel, target, and launch a SCUD missile, and got to practice all of the steps in the role of crew chief on a real functional missile, in its original transporter-erector-launcher. We did everything except fuel it (very nasty stuff) and launch it (no fuel).
This very afternoon, we found a wrist bone of a Giant Ground Sloth at a fossil excavation here in Panama. (That’s a photo of the species we found, which was about the size of a modern elephant.) I went out with several paleontologists to visit a site where a student found some remains of ground sloths and mastondonts several years ago to see if it was worth additional investigation. While we were walking around the yam field where they had been excavated, one of them turned up the bone lying on the surface. There are probably lots more remains at the site.
When I was 16 one of our English class projects was to give a full presentation on what we wanted to pursue as a career. Part of that was to contact and interview someone currently working in that field. After contacting a local paleontologist, I was invited to “help” excavate a mammoth in the Black Rock Desert in Northern Nevada later that year. Fortunately the bones were in remarkable condition, with only the tusks being worn down from exposure. I was in awe of the size of this creature. Amazing.
I’ve also conversed with a member of the mafia. A hitman who ended up testifying against his former associates in return for immunity. He went into the Witness Protection Program and had his story recently published by an author that I know personally. He was the center of a lot of media attention last summer during the Family Secrets Trial going on in Chicago. Interestingly enough, he’s a very charming and modest man.
I was an offical go-fer for a racing team for 4 days in 1998 or so. Got to spend several panicky hours running around Every car store in Colorado Springs trying to find long enough machine-thread capscrews so they could put the suspension back together in their racecar. Without my efforts, they wouldn’t have raced that day.
It was the team owner that taught me to ‘look pissed and like you belong here, you’ll be able to go ANYWHERE’.
It’s advice that’s served me well. Case in point:
A friend and I were playing hookey from work to meet up at an air museum. When we pulled up, there were a TON of brand new Chevy SUV’s. GM had rented the adjacednt lot and lobby of the museum to show off the cars to the local dealerships. My friend and I social-engineered our way into the meeting, saying we were salesmen from a Western Slope dealership I knew about. We spent all morning driving the vehicles on track and on the street and comparing them to the competition. We left before lunch feeling like super-spys.
We had to sign names and SSN’s to register, I made mine up. My compatriot used Richard Nixon’s SSN.
I’m cheating, but I’ll be flying on an Antonov-124 next week. And, I can bring as much luggage as I want, without any excess baggage charges to worry about.
I’ve laid eyes on the world’s largest ball bearing, which is in the equatorial mount of the 140-ft radio telescope at the National Radio Astronomy Observatory in Green Bank, WV. The bearing is a 17.5-ft diameter hunk of steel, and has more engineering and history behind it than you might guess.
I got to play the six string nation guitar last year. Yeah, I know, so have thousands of other people, but it’s still a very cool instrument. I played “Squattin’ at the Grotto”, a George Van Eps composition…
I performed a necropsy (autopsy) on a stunt cow. It was in one of those “eat mor chickin” Chick-Fil-A calendars or something like that. It was the cleanest cow I’ve ever seen.
I bummed Alice Cooper a cigarette. He was really cool.
I had a couple of shots of whiskey with Dickey Betts. Also cool but very drunk.
Made margaritas for Jimmy Buffett and a bunch of his band and crew.
All of the above were when I was tending bar at a golf club near a big music venue. A lot more pro musicians golf than you’d think.
What else? Hmm…
I’ve jammed with a bunch of cool musicians:
Jazz: Stanley Turrentine, Ron Holloway, Javon Jackson, Gerry Mulligan, Robin Nolan
Bluegrass: Pete Wernick, Tony Trischka, Al Munde
Rock: Deanna Bogart, Pat McDonald (Timbuk3), The Big Wu, Mike Kang from String Cheese Incident.
And Sims from Harmonious Wail (a pretty famous Gypsy Swing group) is in my wedding party this september.
I watched a co-worker undergo sexual reassignment surgery. She didn’t have any family members in her life, and, despite being apprehensive, I was just too curious to pass up the trip.
