I don’t want to get involved with the rape v beating arguement, but isn’t this exactly what rape is? At least at the fundamental level?
shrug Not that I, of course, would know a damn thing about it[sup]*[/sup], but I’ve read plenty in the papers about rape cases that have been successfully prosecuted and amount to exactly a disagreement about consent, and not one whit about a man beating the crap out of a woman’s genitals using his own as a bludgeon.
Whether it’s emotionally correct to describe a beating as worse than rape, I certainly observe that many rapes are successfully accomplished with merely the hint of a beating as a threat, suggesting that in the mind of the victim at the time there is no doubt as to what she dreads more.
*Except in the case of an ex-girfriend who was date-raped by a guy she knew a year or two before me. She said that in her case, on a purely physical level it hurt very little.
So she dreads violence followed by rape more than just rape? What does that prove?
Very fair question. I certainly see the point you’re making - that someone might rationally decide that a rape without a beating is at least less traumatic than a rape with one, and that if rape is inevitable, you might at least adopt something of the Confucian philosophy and, though enjoyment’s out of the question, settle for the experience being as little horrible as possible. However, is that the victim’s thought process? Does she think “I’m going to be raped no matter what, so…” ? Or does she just not think it through past “I don’t want to be beaten”?
Agreed, if someone raped my daughter I would be waiting for them when they got out. Whatever the consequences to me I would have payback. Of course it wouldn’t negate the fact that it happened but it might prevent it happening again.
I think the fact that he mocked the mother means he was asking for it.
All of your posts in this thread have made me chuckle sir. Well done! (Really well done) 
And you seem to have missed the part where I said “usually.”
I found a link from Rotten Tomatoes where someone had researched this and found that the mother’s name was Mari Carmen and that she was jailed for a year and then released with some psychiatric supervision.
Spanish article link here
Yes.
I would point out the word “disagreement”. I don’t think it applies. It’s to mild to convey that one’s consent was throttled, battered, shit on and left for dead, as opposed to … “I do apologize for not seeing things your way, however I will need to insert my penis into your colon now. Do be good about this.”
Rape is an assault, but it is frequently not the same as a beating. Having been on the receiving end of both types of assault, I can say that for me, forced rape is not nearly as bad as being beaten. I attended a group comprised of rape victims and also know many other women who have managed to move on and lead mentally healthy, productive lives after being raped. Progress has been made with regard to aftercare, how evidence is collected, and how victims of rape are treated within the process. Is it anecdotal? Certainly. That doesn’t make it bad information.
There are plenty of sites and publications on the subject. The sexual component used to be the primary focus, and due to antiquated notions about purity or the victim “asking for it”, guilt and shame, etc., rape was much harder to overcome in the past. Society, for the most part, no longer sees it that way. Victims are less frequently labeled as the bad guy and it is looked at as an assault, minus the attacks on the victim’s morals. Because we look at it differently than we did years ago, a rape that does not have a beating or other non-sexual violence attached to it is not as difficult to overcome. Both types of assaults require emotional recovery. A beating requires physical recovery, as well. Of course some rapes cause physical damage in and of themselves. Of course a very small child would be more likely to suffer physical damage from a rape. That doesn’t mean most rapes do.
According to FBI statistics, there have been nearly 2 million reported forcible rapes in this country since '86. Not all these people are non-functioning, emotionally crippled zombies. Is it a horrible crime? Yes. I never said it wasn’t. But it is survivable, and frequently with less physical (and emotional) damage than a non-rape assault that ends in broken bones, internal bleeding, and all the mental anguish that goes with it.
Thank you for providing the link, Aspidistra. I read the whole damn thread waiting to find out what happened to the lady. Apparently, her attorneys argued that she did not pose a threat to anyone else in the community, which is true enough.
However, according to the article, other people in the bar were injured when she lit her Rapist-Flambeau. That’s not cool, even if you are temporarily insane.
I think we should poll posters, Kalhoun, and see if most people would rather be beaten than raped. I’m guessing that as long as you aren’t permanently disfigured or disabled, 95% of people would prefer to be beaten.
Murder is not the appropriate response to rape, even though I understand why one might feel that it is.
Yes, and you might want to ask those who’ve been the recipients of both before they answer.
How on Earth do you reach this conclusion? Please share with me your logic. By those lights, the evil and violent will inevitably become masters of the earth (well, more so than they are already).
I’ve never been murdered, still don’t think I would like it.
I was not in the holocaust, but I still think it was a bad thing.
Implying that you must experience a bad thing to make an opinion on it is a poor argument.
Thanks.
Not necessarily. It could be easily be the case that the threat of violence, if the victim is convinced the assailant is willing to follow through with it, convinces her that her resistance is futile. Some rapists–maybe many of them–give their victims the choice of a simple rape versus a beating followed by a rape.
Restricting myself, for a moment, to cases of men raping women: the average adult male is larger than the average adult female. In some cases, it’s MUCH larger. I’m sitting in view of a female friend of mine. I’m a good foot taller than she is, and much heavier and stronger, and she is not trained in any sort of self-defense. If we were in private, and she had no weapon at hand, and I decided to force myself upon her, there is virtually no likelihood she would be able to overcome me. She might reasonably decide that, though she hated the idea of being raped by me more than she hated the idea of taking a beating from me, she hated the idea of suffering the beating AND the rape even more.
But we’re not talking about a single incident here, are we? We’re comparing two things here. Follow along with your finger, if necessary.
So the only people who can say that rape is bad is those who have actually been raped? So much for learning from history…
Your argument is flawed. I’m sure you’ll catch up if you think about it, or maybe you need a big person to help you along?