Mouse problem, so landlord is handing out knives

There is a small out-building at my office used to hold garbage between pickups. It has a rodent problem.

This morning I pointed out to the landlord that there are a lot of mice in the building. To deal with the problem, this afternoon the landlord gave each tenant a key to the out-building, a sharp knife, and a letter of instruction.

You can guess what I thought when I was given a key and a knife.

After I stopped laughing, I read the letter, which set out that he is laying out poison to deal with the mice, and handing out knives to encourage tenants to dismantle their boxes for recycling pickup.

I’m going to ask the office manager if there will be a training seminar on knife fighing with mice.

You might want to check to make sure you’re not trapped inside the training level of a role-playing game.

That, or in a ballet.

Were these carving knives? And are the mice blind? And how many of them are there?

Don’t worry, the knife is +2 because of the poison.

You’re supposed to cut off their tails. Duh!

Yes but is the +2 global or only for Rodents of Unusual Size?

Your landlord is a moron. Everyone knows you should use a cudgel on rodents. A mace will do, too, but they’re a bit messy. Your landlord needs to find a better smithy.

How many mice do you have to kill before he gives you a short sword?

Maybe you’re supposed to give the knives to your cats so that they can kill more mice at one time?

All you need is to strap the knives to a cat. One cat. This cat.

Rodents of Unusual Size? I dont think they exist.

[Shao Kahn] ROUND ONE…FIGHT!![/Shao Kahn]

Somebody left the rat faucet on!

If they are Silver, you got Were-Rats.

[Marty Feldman]“Where rat…? There, rat…!”[/Marty Feldman]

Actually, I’ve been fond of a story I remember reading somewhere about an enterprising engineering tinkering type who decided to try to electrify the kitchen floor in his/her apartment. And, umm, put a little too much voltage into the system. (If anyone else remembers this, I’d love a link.)

Just be thankful you’re not in Sumatra (or Borneo).

At least they didn’t give you a fork with the knife…

Strawb’ry tart!