Movie WTF moments

This is not the kind of WTF moment that everyone is talking about, but it’s what leapt immediately to mind: my sister and her boyfriend happened across Grizzly Man on television a month ago, and watched the whole thing with the assumption that it was a fake documentary along the lines of Best in Show. She got into a conversation with a co-worker about it the next day that went something like this:

Sister: I thought it was really funny.
Co-worker: Funny? The guy was eaten by a bear!
Sister [put out]: It’s not like it was real or anything.
Co-worker: It was real!
Sister: It couldn’t be real! There’s no Gulliver’s Travels theme restaurant!

She didn’t believe her co-worker until she read a few articles about the movie on-line. Seriously. I should mention that my sister and her boyfriend are both adults, well educated, and not particularly known for spending their evenings hitting the cough syrup. Since I saw the film already knowing the story, I can’t really speak to how clueless the two of them were being. I would have thought the Discovery Channel doesn’t show fake documentaries, but Treadwell was pretty over-the-top, I guess. Anyway, she certainly had a WTF moment.

Actually, thinking this through:

There WOULD still be times where we had night, jupiter would be far enough around the solar system that it would appear in the sky during sunlit-daylight hours, right?

I’m not an astrophysicist, so I could easily be wrong.

Having seen Grizzly Man, the Discovery Channel cut, which is probably what your sister and her man saw, I can say I have no idea how they could think that. None of it is played for laughs. Some of it is funny but the same way some things are always funny in documentaries regardless of the subject. Weird human interactions and the dude was just so crazy as to be funny sometimes… But to think it’s Chris Guest style mockumentary… Wow you have to be pretty out of touch.

With respect to 2010: Odyssey Two (I did see the movie but am more familiar with the book):

[spoiler]I think the aliens were just trying to preserve the unique brand of life that had evolved on Europa, not necessarily individual species that happened to be there at that particular time. The book made it quite clear that without their intervention there would be no life on Europa within (I think) a matter of millennia. The books and movies also had already made it quite clear the aliens think and plan on much longer time scales than that. Similarly the aliens wouldn’t care if SOME Earth species died out, as long as most or even some Earth species, and especially humans, could continue.

Anyway isn’t the inscrutable alien intelligence a hallmark of Arthur C. Clarke’s fiction?

[/spoiler]

Pirates aren’t very smart.

Let’s go back to the Fifth Element. I find it particularly amazing that the Supreme Being was aimed directly at the evil fireball at exactly the right moment. We have to just be glad that the Egyptians built the pyramids in the right place…

Not really a movie, but I could only make it through the first episode of The Walking Dead. I thought that someone waking up in a hospital after 6 weeks and being in a spotlessly white hospital gown was totally impossible.

I thought, “I really hate zombies!”

There are plenty of WTF moments in films. Some result from the director liking a shot because it looks gorgeous, or it has some sort of mythic resonance, even if it makes no logical sense.*

One of my peeves is the film Alien, which annoys me for several reasons and on several levels, and all the fanwanking in the universe won’t save it for me. I’m particularly annoyed when Ripley goes into the “pod” to talk with the ship computer “Mother”, and suddenly there’s Ash behind her. They fight, and Ash tries to gag her with a rolled-up magazine (a spoon not being handy, I guess). In the tussle, his head comes off.

Where to begin?
1.) How the hell does Ash get into the Mother pod in the first place? We’;re sorta given the impression it’s a one-person-at-a-time deal.

2.) How does he get in without Ripley noticing? It’s not like it’s a big place, and she wasn’t that intent on Mother.

3.) Why the hell does Ash try to kill her at that point?

4.) Why try to do it with a rolled-up-magazine? Is there some symbolism I’m missing there? And, you gotta wonder, a magazine? It’s hard enough to get them nowadays, and they’re on a ship long outta port. You’d think they’d be read to rags if they were print versions. But you’d really think they’d be reading on tablets or something, a la Star Trek over a decade earlier.

5.) Ash’s head coming off and revealing white pus-like stuff is the biggest WTF moment of the movie. In context, you expect this to be some Alien thing, like the Alien has taken him over, or something. The fact that they have robots in the future hasn’t e4ven been established. This is a clear anti-Chekov’s Gun situation. If you want us to buy the idea of future humaniform robots that are indistinguishable from people, you oughtta at least mention it at some point. It’s not hard to slip it into the dialogue somewhere. Scott obviously wanted his Moment of Surprise, and shortchanged his audience.

6.) part of me, raised on the EDmond Hamilton classification of artificial people forms, is still kinda miffed that Ash is called a Robot instead of an Android. This was the beginning of the blurring of the lines of the EH distinctions.

*(As in Forbidden Planet, when Altaira’s tiger attacks her after her romantic interlude with Commander J. J. Adams. Makes not a lick of sense in the context of the story, but it’s a great “loss-of-innocence” image, and I guess they couldn’t resist. Oddly, the scene does make sense in the context of the situation as set up in the rarely-read novelization. But the novel ain’t canon)

I felt that way about Kenny Rogers in the We Are the World recording – “who did he blow to get in the room?”

The whole Ash scene was a very blatant sexual metaphor dude. VERY blatant.