Moving on after losing your great dog

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

A couple of months ago, we had to put down my beloved Bitz the Wondermutt (profile duck | My beloved Wondermutt Bitz, with her all time… | Flickr) at age 10 and a bit due to liver failure.

Bitz was more than my pet. She was my partner. She was our duck fetching fool and great protector of our home. She was a one dog security system that knew when something needed to be investigated and when something was just another dog walking past the house. When something needed to be checked out, I got one, “Woof!” that translated to, “Threat detected. I am going to investigate. Please wake your lazy biped self up and come give me tactical support.”

She knew my every mood and movement and would always take the appropriate action. If I needed to play, she’d bring me a toy to throw. If I were depressed, she would slip her muzzle under my hand, toss her incredibly strong neck and flip my hand into the air so it landed on the back of her neck. I think she figured, “If you pet me, you’ll feel better.” She was always right.

When we brought home her little sister Sydney the bulldog three and a half years ago, there was no jealousy. Even though she’d never had pups of her own, she immediately took this confused little lump of wrinkled confusion under her paw and did more than my wife or I ever did to raise her up right.

I know no dog will ever replace Bitz in my heart, but there’s a lot of room in there to love a new dog, and I’ve started looking around. Thing is, I don’t want another pet. Between Syd and Zaney the cat I’ve got two great pets. What I want and need is a dog I can teach the details of home security and good companionship to.

I found a dog at an excellent little private shelter a few weeks ago, but unfortunately she’s just not going to be big enough when she reaches full size. She’ll max out at around 50 pounds and 20 inches at the withers, and I just don’t think I could trust a dog that size to seriously protect home and hearth. She had the right disposition and personality; so it made saying no all that much harder.

Luckily Phoenix has a large number of shelters and rescues; so I’m confident I’ll find one eventually. Unfortunately, I’ve gotten to the point in the grief process that I’m missing the companionship of a larger dog in general almost as much as I’m missing the companionship of Bitz in particular. It’s making being patient and finding the right girl difficult, as opposed to just running out to the mastiff rescue and taking whatever they’ve got.

Bitz was too good a dog to let any old pooch take her place just because it had the right physical features, though. I’ll wait, but it sucks.

2

When I’ve lost a dog, the next dog I got in know way resembled the previous dog. It’s just not fair to the new dog to try to live up to the legacy left by the one you loved. I will say, though, that I’ve had at least one doberman for the last 25 years (I have 2 right now, and 4 other rescued dogs). In fact, three years ago, 1 week before my dobie Simon died in his sleep, dobie Grace was dumped near my farm. For loyalty, sensibility and devotion, I think they’re unparalleled.

You never replace a dog you loved, your heart just grows to accomodate the new member of the family.

StG

3

Indeed. A beloved dog does not have replacements, but rather successors.

The late great Miss Emily Kimberly was our Best Beloved, but that doesn’t make her successors Phyllis and Dottie any less beloved. The only difference is that they’re just the ones that we can pet now. Their only resemblance to Miss Emily, besides the obvious one of being the same breed, is that they have their own goofy and lovable quirks, same as Miss Emily did.

Yes, Miss Emily, we still love you, though you’ve been gone nine years and change. But we love these two jokers too!

4

I went through what you have just gone through-abouta year ago. A beloved dog is a friend that nothing can replace-but, time heals.
Im sure you will find a wonderful, new canine friend.

5

Well, to tell you the truth, both of our dogs died after a lengthy period decrepitude, and it was a relief. They weren’t the dogs they used to be, and the poor things probably couldn’t grok why. I’m very sorry for your loss. You have a lot of happy memories and Bitz loved you, I’m sure.

6

Bitz loved me even more than I loved her. She had intermittent health issues the last couple years, and that included increasingly frequent liver attacks. The last round, she didn’t rally from in a couple days like she always had, and just continued to slide.

I called the house call vet, and Bitz left this world with myself, my wife, my brother and two sisters in the room with her. The last words she heard was me saying, “I love you, girl. You’re a good dog. Thank you.” The last thing she saw was my face.

We were so connected that I felt when she passed, and I felt her pain and discomfort end too. While I wept like a child, I was also relieved that my dearest companion was no longer suffering.

It was the last good thing I could for her and, despite the pain of loss, I’ve never regretted doing it.

7

Of course. You did the right thing.

People like yourself understand when it is time to move on. So does the dog.

Carry her in your heart (you always will), and some day, find a new friend that you can make a perfect home for.

8

We put Daisy down last Feb. Got Clover in March, then Buster T in November.
Each of them are/wer the “best dog in the world” - as was Bowser before Daisy.

Getting puppies was weird, as they are so different from your old dog who already knows EVERYTHING. For us I think it made the transition easier, as caring for a pup is so different from living with a dog.

If you like the shelter pup, get her. She and Sydney will be ale to keep hearth and home secure from most anything short of an all out armed assault. In terms of protection, the bark is more important than the bite. Heck, most mastiffs I’ve known would do little to stop an intruder other than possibly trip them! :wink:

50 pounds is big enough to be a serious dog. You’ll be able to rough-house with it and work it all day But if you know you love/need a huge dog, I imagine you may not be satisfied.

Good luck. But realize, you will eventually find another “best dog in the world!”

9

I had to do this with a 3 year-old mini-daschund last month. She was just too young for that. I’m a tough, cynical old bastard - but damn that was hard to do.

In my mind, I’ll always see her running across the pasture, ears flying behind her. Running just for pure joy of it.

My condolences to you.

10

Awww, crap, Tully. I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize. I love the picture of the Flying Dachsunds in your flickr album.

11

It’s been 7 years since I put Khasi, my companion of 23 years down and I still think of him and his protection (no one came NEAR me while I slept, he saw to that). He was a rescue/shelter dog who chose me instead of me choosing him. He was succeeded by another rescue/shelter dog who also chose me. I’ve come to understand that is how it must be.

I’ve also come to learn that time and love and experience will teach your new friend everything he (or she) needs to know. I’m sorry for your loss but not for your experience, loss is a part of the richness of life, just like the joy of chasing that duck.

<peace>

12

Your dog lived to be 23? Wow, that’s amazing. Still all too short, but… geez, that was one hell of a dog you had there. I’ve never known a dog to make it to 23. Cats sometimes do. If you have any dog health tips, share them, because you were doing something right there.

My Deej lived to be 16 and I thought THAT was impressive, though, of course, it was decades too short and no dog could ever conceivably replace her.

13

Seems to me the longer you’re with an animal companion, the more it hurts to lose them–of course, losing them waaaaay to young has its own special pain. I had my boy-cat Trouble for 15 years.

14

One of my favorite dog quotes:

“The misery of keeping a dog is his dying so soon. But, to be sure, if he lived for fifty years and then died, what would become of me?”
—Sir Walter Scott

15

I have an appointment this weekend to go meet a 2 year old brindled English/Neapolitan mastiff mix.

We’ll see if she chooses me. If it’s not a fit, it’s not a fit, but I’m liking the initial signs.

16

I put down my beloved English Springer Spaniel Paget two years ago. I have since adopted two demon Cavalier King Charles Spaniels. They will never be Paget. Ever. Sorry to be depressing, but I’m not over it. I love my new dogs, but it’s not the same. They make me laugh and I love them, but I don’t believe I will ever sleep on the floor in their bed just to spoon them like I did Paget… :frowning:

17

I’m so sorry to hear about Bitz, FallenAngel. My very first post here on the dope was about the loss of my beloved Mao, and I’m thankful for all the support I got from other Dopers. Pets are wonderful, and they all burrow their way in and make homes in our hearts. It’s never fun to have that home become empty. I think Scarlett67 has it correct, tho.

I’ll be changing that to “pet” since I’m a cat person, but the sentiment is right on.

18

I feel you, man. I had to put Haplo down a few weeks ago, and we got Captain on Saturday. I feel like a traitor because Captain is such a good dog. I on purpose got a completely different animal in every way from Hap, but I just feel like kind of a sleaze for being glad that I don’t have to worry about Captain with the cats (they’re mean to him and it hurts his feelings - he weighs, I don’t know, a hundred pounds what Haplo did and I’d trust Captain with these unfamiliar cats all day long and wouldn’t let Hap with them for a minute) or for enjoying all the tricks Captain can do or for being happy that I don’t have to watch my dinner with Captain around, even though he can reach the kitchen counters.