“Mr. and Mr. DMark are proud to announce their marriage. They flew into sunny Southern California and then, in a private ceremony in Beverly Hills, the two exchanged vows. Following the nuptials, they headed off to celebrate with cake, with thousands in attendance, and then had an intimate dinner at a world famous LA restaurant. They are currently on an extended honeymoon in Las Vegas.”
Huffnpuffington Post - September 13, 2012
How’s that for a report! And every word is true!
However….(put on your Paul Harvey voice and say) “Here is the REST of the story…”
There is a certain irony in the fact that we live in Las Vegas, arguably the marriage capital of the world, but had to fly over to LA to get legally married – but that is what we did.
As I have just recently become unemployed, you might think spending the money to fly over to LA to get married might not have been the wisest decision – but for a whole bunch of legal and financial reasons, this really is in our very best interests – and lordknows I have the time now. Just the savings on taxes this year will probably pay for the trip and fees, plus some!
We have been together for just shy of 33 years, so a grand wedding is not something we particularly needed nor wanted – we were looking for cheap, quick and easy – adjectives often used in describing the two of us.
Searched the Internet and Orbitz got us the best flight/hotel/car rental deal – the price of gas to drive over there would have cost about 75% of the cost of the flight for both of us to fly (Virgin America – how appropriate for a wedding trip!), and eliminating the stress of the 4+ hour drive each way. We got a decent hotel in our old West Hollywood neighborhood – The Ramada Inn – so we knew our way around. The car rental was not bad - $32/day for a very cool Hyundai Sonata Hybrid – probably only used 9 ounces of gas the whole time we were there and to top off the tank when we returned it, I splurged and put in two gallons. It was far more than was needed. Forgot about LA and parking and – well, we really did spend more money on parking the damned car than renting and driving it!
The idea was to get the marriage licenses at the closest Court House on Wednesday – which in our case was Beverly Hills, about two miles from our hotel – and then have the civil ceremony on Thursday. Well, it didn’t quite turn out that way.
We zoomed in and got the license in less than 10 minutes (really!) but were then informed that the civil ceremony would be a problem – they were booked through October!
Seeing our dismay, and hearing we had flown in from Nevada just for this purpose, the nice clerk in the license office said, “Hold on a minute.” She made a call and said, “I can get you in – NOW – but you have to go immediately – there is only 15 minutes between ceremonies she can fit you in.”
Off we dash to the next floor – a very sweet judge ushered us into a nice little chapel-type area with seating for 45, and it was just her and the two of us.
Very solemn and nice ceremony.
She did offer to take a picture of us on our cell phones – however, although we had brought nice clothes for the ceremony, we thought we were only going to pick up the marriage licenses and were dressed like we were off to go to Walmart – not knowing this was going to take place that very day! We declined the photo – it would have been more embarrassing to show that to anyone than not to have a photo. Luckily, I am pretty handy with Photoshop, so I think there will be a more suitable photo sometime soon.
Well – now we were suddenly married – in and out in less than 30 minutes!
All that was missing from this wedding was a shotgun.
And for the only time during our stay in LA, we didn’t even have to pay extra for parking, as the first two hours are free!
Now what?
Well – we didn’t have any real plans so we drove to Farmers’ Market and roamed around to find our favorite bakery and had cake – and there were thousands of people milling around the market – so there you have it – a huge reception with cake! Granted – we didn’t know anyone there, but we wouldn’t be the first people to not know everyone who showed up at their reception!
As we drove out of the Farmers’ Market, we noticed a new (for us) little restaurant called the Currywurst. This is a famous snack food in Berlin – which is where we met – so we figured it would be appropriate to go there for dinner! Nice clean little place – with some articles from German newspapers hanging on the wall, describing the place – see, it really is internationally renowned! Two currywursts, one order of fries with mayo, a Coke and a Diet Coke and voila – dinner for two at a famous LA restaurant!
The next day we sort of had nothing to do…we thought it was going to be the actual wedding day – so we just drove around and saw some of the old neighborhood, stopped by one of our old haunts for a beer and then drove off to the airport for the trip home – to Las Vegas – for our extended honeymoon – which is what we have been having for close to 33 years anyway!
If you wish to send a belated wedding gift, we are registered at Home Depot, Walmart, Green Valley Ranch Casino and Pizza Hut.
My Gusband* and I are very happily married now!
Let the rice throwing begin! (Preferably, not cooked Minute Rice in the bag…)
*Gusband: My new phase meaning the Gay equivalent of Husband.
