Multitasking at the wheel

I was stopped at a traffic light at a busy intersection this morning when I noticed a woman at the wheel of a minivan in an adjacent lane.

One hand held a cigarette, the other a curling iron as she styled her hair. I was hoping she’d grab her cellphone for the trifecta, as that would increase the entertaining possibility of her setting her hair on fire - but alas, her light changed and she drove off, still multitasking.

It was then that I noticed the duct tape holding the left rear of her vehicle together. I have a theory on how that came to be…

I saw a guy doing reps with a dumbell on the highway one morning. Damndest thing.

The scariest thing I’ve ever seen another driver doing was reading a paperback book which was propped upon the steering wheel.

We were just blowing down the freeway at 70 mph and there she was, reading a book. There wasn’t much traffic, and she was keeping to her lane, but geez!

welby got his brand new car scratched up by a woman who was eating a hamburger with one hand while talking with her cellphone with the other. She was steering with her wrist, and had a tiny dog on her lap. When he asked her why she didn’t at least put the dog on the passenger seat, she said that was where her laptop was. :smack:

Apparently she kept saying, “I don’t know why you’re so upset.”

[Jeff Foxworthy]If you can drive a stick, smoke a cigarette and nurse a baby at the same time, you might be a redneck[/Jeff Foxworthy]

My best friend is this person. I am pretty close to terrified any time we go somewhere. She’s digging in her briefcase that’s in the back seat, smoking a cigarette, balancing a bottle of something or other on her lap and trying to navigate the dips and curves of the country roads around here. It’s white knuckles, baby.

Omigod, same here! Except mine was on a three-land surface street and when I came upon here we were approaching a giant ‘S’ curve in the road. She was in the middle lane and I was in the right hand lane, when she came floating into my lane right in front of me :eek: ! So I braked and calmed down and decided to play it safe and pass her on the left, but then we reached the next section of the ‘S’ curve, and she came drifting into the left-hand lane right in front of me :eek: ! It was only after the road straightened and I was able to pass her that I saw she was reading a paperback propped on the steering wheel. The worst part was that the horn on my car didn’t work, so I was never able to alert her how close she came to a horrible accident.

Shit, you think THAT’S scary? I was once (one time only!) in the passenger seat of a car, riding with a driver who was doing just this, at just that speed, on two-lane country roads.

Reading me Dead Rock Hudson Jokes.


I can eat a burger, drink the soda, and text message someone while driving a stick shift. However, I don’t LIKE to do those things, so I generally don’t because it does stretch my multitasking abilities. :slight_smile:

Some people can, some people can’t. I even wait until I get to a stop sign to dig my cigarettes out, cuz I figure I’m trying to set a good example for all of the morons over here that can’t keep track of a conversation and drive at the same time. eyes California Take them back!

(Note: not slandering Californians in any way, but I’ve noticed an upsurge of traffic accidents involving cell phones and California license plates here lately)


Confession time:

While driving home from high school, I was challenged to solve my Rubik’s Cube before getting home (5-7 minute drive). I took the challenge and solved the thing with about two minutes to spare, no problem. This was especially weird because I can’t even eat a plain hamburger while driving.