With apologies to the people of Ohio WITH brains, and Cajun musicians everywhere:
Oh me oh my, Oh me oh my, oh my Ohio
Fuck your ass and stuff it with gress from the Florida Bayou
You suck my dick, you stroke my prick, oh you Ohio
Son of a bitch, you sleep with the fish, you’re dead Ohio
Why pick on Ohio? The vast majority of the States preferred Bush. You’ve got a lot more writin’ to do to diss 'em all. Your apology should go to Hank Williams, Sr, whose music you parody. Judging from the results in Louisiana, Cajun musicians probably won’t be playing your tune anyway. 
Gotta blame somebody. Bush picked Iraq. I picked Ohio.
The tune suggested itself from the name. I would do a rant against Florida based on Glen Gampbell’s Galveston.
There’s a Neil Young song about Albama that could probably work unchanged. Not to mention Southern Man.
Yeah, but Lynyrd Skynyrd ran Neil Young out of these parts…
Yeah, but somebody drove Lynyrd Skynyrd right into the ground. So there.
I seem to recall him being in a band with a song about…Ohio!
*Provisional ballots, grumblin,
we finally got to vote,
this November I hear the yawning,
long lines in Ohio.
Gotta get down to it,
Lawyers are clogging our streets,
Shoulda been home long ago.*
Here’s a poem I wrote this morning:
America, Oh Shining Beacon of the World
A suburbian paradise, the land of the free,
A nice pretty pretty house to appeal to the senses,
Bodies of niggers hanging from trees,
And their severed heads stuck on the white picket fences.
Let’s execute children who dare to wear black,
They probably worship the Lord of the Flies,
Now come over here and I’ll show you the back,
The place where the faggots are all crucified.
Round up the towelheads before it’s too late,
They’re terrorists who hate us because we are free,
Now let’s join together and all celebrate,
The nightmare that is The American Dream.
It wasn’t so much driving into the ground as it was crashing into the ground.
Lovely! Bush-supporting state dirges are good.
So if we’d been a little quicker about voting, someone else would catch your ire instead? I blame those lazy kids at Oberlin who couldn’t get up early to vote, but had to straggle into line late, clutching their double espresso latte mochas and IM’ing each other.
What are you? Some kinds fact-findie Democrat? Drove… crashed… like it matters.
Maybe they shoulda had the National Guard out prodding them with bayonets.
Hey, leave my alma mater out of this! They all voted absentee, I’m sure.
I am sure that your one man circle jerk was all that and more but your fantasies have no place in the current state of affairs.
I disagree. Depression is a perfectly appropriate response. Wasn’t that a depressing poem?
Okay, I’m going to bed now. Alone again. And when I get up, I want all of you to have put your toys away and get this mess cleared away. And we will be nice to Ohio all day tomorrow, or else.
Uh, no. It was just :rolleyes: :rolleyes: -inducing. Like a mix up of shitty Goth poetry and the maniacal ravings of a street preacher. Zack De La Rocha wrote better, for crying out loud.
I think it was a brilliant satire of goth poetry, and if you don’t agree with me you’re a close-minded Showgirls hater.
Wow, aren’t you clever! You have almost a third grade wit!
I never claimed it was good. I’ve written better than that. I just honestly think that “The American Dream” is what fucks us all up. All of our social injustice has been carried out in its name.
Besides, Zac de la Rocha never intentionally mangled words just for fun, so there.