My Busy Day

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
21

First, I’d like to say I have never set myself on fire, by grill or any other method of combustion.

Now, back to puke stories. We have two dogs. I have Lucy, a Jack Russell Terrorist, and the Little Woman has Nicki, a Sheltie. Nicki has a big run-up before the Main Event. Plenty of warning. Only she tends to stay two rooms away from the boys and I can’t be more than one room away or that would be Bad Parenting. I’m not allowed to drink on the job either, which I think is unfair. Since Nicki is generally off somewhere when she heaves, even after the extended prolog, it’s still a surprise when you find it. She once heaved on my brand new sneakers that I hadn’t even worn yet. Oddly, she’s still around.

Lucy, on the other hand, gives little or no warning. Saturday was a “no warning” day. Just herk and I had some cleaning to do. A couple of weeks ago, she jumped out of bed licking and slapping her gums. When she licks for No Good Reason, that’s a Bad Thing. That was my Alert. So when she gave her one preliminary heave, I scooped her up and… now what was I gonna do? The door is downstairs and my little puke time-bomb wouldn’t wait! I had an idea, the bathroom, I was standing right by the bathroom door, so in there! There’s tile, easily cleaned tile. And there’s the toilet, the easily cleaned (with one flush) toilet. Only I didn’t make it to the toilet. I held her over the sink. That was easy to clean too.

And when you find a “cold case”, you know who was the perpetrator. If it’s half-hidden behind furniture, it was Nicki. If it’s in the middle of the room, Lucy.

You have pets for any length of time and you pick up on their subtleties.

Trivia: When you buy a circular saw, you have to buy a saw blade too. How stupid is that? When you buy a blender, it comes with the pitcher part. You don’t have to buy the sucker tube when you get a ShopVac. But buy a saw and you still need a blade. Gah.

If you paid any attention to the OP, you’d know TornaDope is next month Shibb. May 15th. OK, to be honest it’s not in the OP. It’s the sig under the OP. But it’s right there right before Lissla’s post.

And we’re all very snooty around here Tupug. We use salad forks. Usually not for the actual salad, but still we use 'em.
-Rue. (salad forked)

22

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Oh, wait. You’re just talking about some plant thing. Never mind.

23

I went to a friends’ house for barbecue this weekend, and there was a slight amount of FWOOSH-ing going on. The cheese on the cheeseburgers melted and landed in the fire and up came the flames - so burgers & buns were slightly charred. Didn’t stop me from eating though - and lots of food was to be had.

I also went to my first hula dancing class this weekend. Lots to learn - but looks like total fun. They taught me the steps without the hand movements first, and then wanted to see if I could do it with the hands at the same time. After the first try, they suggested I do it without the hands first. :smiley:

Susan

24

I noticed when I was grilling steaks this weekend that my grill is in need of a Grill Gut Transplant, too but I’ve decided to wait until the Man of the House (aka He Who Owns the Tools) has an, ummm, Happy Day before I mention it. This will be the second Transplant and much cussing accompanied the first one.

I was in a Deep Laze this week, a condition so immobile that a mirror was held in front of my nose to see if it fogged up. Fortunately it did, or the envelope marked “to be opened in the event of my death” might have spilled a few beans prematurely. Yard work awaits. Maybe this week. Maybe not.

I hate cleaning cat puke.

By the way FairyChatMom told me to drop by here. She was right, it is fun!

25

So I wasn’t the only one cleaning up dog mess this weekend…

Spooner had some roast beef that we later realized wasn’t really fit for human (or dog) consumption & has had lower-intestinal problems since Sat night. :eek:

At least she goes in the same general spot - behind the pool table in the front room. Woolite Carpet cleaner is hardly making a dent - I may have to try Rue’s secret weapon. The carpet’s already suffered from other accidents & will never be quite the same. She’s banished/barricaded in the kitchen this afternoon, just in case.

Compared to this time last year - when she was recuperating from the first of two knee blowouts (which we have one more payment on) - I shouldn’t complain.

26

Our kitten has started peeing on our bed. Just the quilt. The quilt has been soaking all morning and is in the laundry with lots of soap and baking powder.

She used to do it when she was nervous or upset just after we got her.

She’s not frickin’ nervous now. I have no idea how to stop her- we can’t stay home and watch her all the time, and we don’t have a door that we can close between her and the rest or the apartment- unless we lock her permanently in the bathroom.

Any advice?

Oh, yeah. I’m snooty and highbrow.

Quit snickering!

27

Mr. ShibbOleth, Sir, yes, dog types and not a lame space fantasy reference (although the dogs do look a lot like Frank). I don’t know about Rue’s cut but he did mention an address where I could send a half dozen salad forks.

28

I set myself on fire once. It had nothing to do with a grill, though.
I had crashed on the floor of a friend’s house after a party. Several other people were also crashed on the floor, and various blankets, sleeping bags, etc. were overlapping and what-not. I had stirred somewhat from my peaceful slumber, enough to roll over and maybe yawn, before going under again. But something was not quite right…something annoying that was keeping me from drifting into peaceful slumber-land. What was it? After a while, I realized that there was a loud crackling noise…what the…? I rubbed my eyes and sat up to discover that the down comforter I was using was now on fire. Wait. My feet are on fire. That’s weird…wait…MY FEET ARE ON FIRE!!! AAAARAARRAGAHAGAAHH!!! I begin to frantically beat at the comforter around my feet, wailing away until the flames are finally out. And as I sat there, absorbing what happened and finally actually waking up, I saw that the down comforter had burned itself a few good holes that had, with the help of my beating at it, scattered feathers throughout the entire room like a beautiful snow-scene. They were floating through the air, stuck on the walls, in my hair, and all over the other people, still sleeping peacefully on the floor. One of the most surreal moments of my life. It was a candle, by the way, that someone had left on the floor, had been knocked over by me when I rolled over, and had taken a minute or so to burn a hole through the side of the candle and set me on fire.

P.S. My dog also puked a little this weekend, from eating bones. She was outside already though.

29

I went to a BBQ this weekend, too. I was kinda freaked out, and this is why: every time my friend would go to load a cooked burger patty onto a bun, he would set the bottom of the bun on top of the second plate of raw burger patties. He set the bun directly on top of the raw meat! Or if there were no burger patties, he’d just plop the bun onto the raw burger juice. It was hard for me to justify eating the cheeseburger he gave me, but somehow I did.

Then we watched a couple of my friends’ kids playing. They were running 'round and 'round a column in the middle of the house, but unfortunately, they were running in opposite directions and couldn’t see each other 'til it was too late. Twice they ran around the column, directly at each other and the sound their heads made when they connected reminded me of the sound of coconuts being smacked together. Speaking of which, I need 2 green coconuts and 2 ripe coconuts for my wedding ceremony this weekend.

Oh, and 25 fruits of any kind. I was going to pick up 5 bunches of bananas, but haven’t yet been able to figure out if one banana = one fruit, or if each bunch is considered a fruit. If one bunch of bananas= one fruit, maybe I can just get a big bunch of grapes in the hopes that each grape would be one fruit, too, but that would probably be pushing it.

And now it’s Monday, and I’ve been cleaning for hours and hours - okay, so maybe just one and a half hours, but it feels like hours and hours. Since we’re getting married Saturday and lots of my fiance’s relatives are descending upon us from overseas and all want to see where we live, I damn well better have a clean house. The fiance will be helping me tonight when he gets home from work, but he doesn’t know it yet. :smiley:

Maybe I’ll invite Rue to trim my cats’ toenails, too. Both came declawed, and my black cat has one nail growing in on his front paw sideways. Poor kitty. Fortunately, it didn’t have to go through skin or anything, so it’s not infected - it just grows out of his claw bed sideways. It looks weird 'cause it curlicues up toward his paw, but never touches it. I clip it occaisionally to make sure it doesn’t hurt him or the other cat, but I haven’t had it taken out 'cause I don’t want him put under anesthetic if he doesn’t have to be. My other cat could use anesthetic, though. She’s part siamese and part something else that gave her a tail that looks like a raccoon that looks weird with her white spotted body and siamese head. I think someone mean was playing pin the tail on the cat before I picked her up at the pound.

30

overlyverbose congrats on the upcoming nuptializations! Get 25 tomatoes. What? They are so to fruits! Afterwards you could stuff em with some tuna or chicken salad and have a nice brunch. See, practical and tasty!

Ghanima you set yourself on fire and nobody noticed? Next time try for a big FWOOSH sound. That’ll get their attention!

Welcome Tupug Anachi and Cub Mistress! Don’t worry this is a clique for anybody. See my sig line for proof. Oh and Tupag don’t worry about the salad fork. True Rue does use one but he uses it as a back scratcher. Cub Mistress did FCM drop by Tennessee personally to invite you? That’d be mighty neighborly of her.

31

Hmph. I woulda been the first person to post to Rue’s thread, except you all are lazybirds. I made my first post at 6:44 this morning and even checked for the MMP. Nothin’. Oh, well.

My weekend was uneventful. I cut out sewing patterns and tried to pin them to the fabric, then realized my kitchen table is way too small to fit all the fabric on. Then I got distracted and learned a new recipe for salmon for dinner. Mmm salmon.

See, I still really want a kitten or a cat on my own, but these type of threads keep discouraging me. I’d really love a good cat, but I’m not so sure what I’d do if I ever got stuck with a bad kitty who hurled and peed and such. I mean the bad ones who do it out of spite, you know which ones they are.

Best wishes for your wedding, overlyverbose! ANd welcome to Tupug Anachi. Don’t worry, I’m not snooty, even if Rue is. :smiley:

32

Thanks Swanpy and MD! Oh, and I’m not the least bit worried about somebody being snooty if he doesn’t know that a serrated bread knife is a much better back scratcher than a salad fork. He does write one heck of a funny MMP each week, though!

33

So sorry, Swampy. How mortifying. :o

34

Ha! That’s what you think! I said I had strings of bananas and I really meant that kind of banana. So c’mere Rue, no, I don’t have pruning shears in my other hand, c’mere!

Okay, so are you nightmared up for a while guys?

Also, I’m terribly fancy and have the snootiness to back it up. I have actual forks for getting little shrimps out of their shells ‘n’ stuff. A whole set of 'em. Nothing else but the basic silverware, but if you ever have recalcitrant shrimp, I’m your gal.

Rue, I’ve always liked Jack Russell Terriers. They make me feel very lazy though, all that energy, yikes. Fun to play with and then I give them back to their owners. I have the same policy for children. Also, Lucy is a cool name, always wanted to name a dog Lucy, and Anne, Anne is good as well. My pets are all named after herbs though. Which was fun when I named my canary Basil, but now I’m naming fish stuff like Cohosh and I’m starting to see a downside to cutesy-poo naming themes, beyond that they’re cutesy-poo.

Overlyverbose, please tell me you’re kidding about the raw juice BBQ! Didn’t that guy get the memo that was sent out to every person in the whole world, and several adjacent planets, that cooked plus raw is bad? You’re more brave than I, and polite too. I’d have slapped those burgers ‘n’ stuff out of his hand. Which may explain my popularity or lack thereof. Nevermind.

35

Ah. How I love stepping in dog puke at 6 in the morning. Not. One of our dogs loves to eat poop. And grass. And sticks. And gutter gunk. She has not yet figured out that her body cannot digest gutter gunk, so she hurls a lot. Thankfuly we have wood floors, so we can just use a good old papertowel and mop. It still becomes a pain that our dog Peanut would rather pee on the floor then in the nice big backyard. At least she is a doxie. We have a big dog Donner (he was born on Christmas!) and he never had to be housebroken. Which is a plus since he is a husky-shepard mix, and his poops are HUGE. He is a very good pup. I wish he could be a role model for Peanut though…

calm kiwi, you have a cat named Meowth!?!? That ROCKS! I swear, if I ever get a lizard, I am naming it Charazard. Or Chester. Either way, its cool.

36

Somebody has to ask why, might as well be me. Why do you need 2 green coconuts, 2 ripe cocoanuts, and 25 fruits of any kind?*

*Biting tongue hard to keep from making un-PC joke involving… nevermind

37

Okay, maybe I’m just not up on current marriage customs (never having had one myself. Yet.) overlyverbose, darlin’, why do you need ripe and unripe coconuts and 25 other fruits for your wedding? Is it just me, or are others picturing a big food fight?
Welcome to all these new people. We’re not snooty, although we do have one princess who regularly posts and several of us are certain that the universe revolves around us (which would given it several different center points, perhaps why the universe seems to be in such a mess), but other than that, we’re just good folks.
Except Ex. Who I am still not talking to.

38

No, FCM didn’t come here in person. It was in my introduction thread and there was the little matter of a shipment of chocolate. At least she told me it was customary to send her a shipment of chocolate. How much did ya’ll send, by the way???

overlyverbose I’m wondering about all those fruits, too. Enlighten us.

39

Well, hello to all and welcome to the newbies!

I had a very busy Saturday too. Up with the sun, did a little putzing around the house, took a shower and fixed my hair, made sure all the rest of the Taters family took their showers and purtified themselves, and dropped daughter off at school at 11:30. Raced to downtown to find a parking space for the parade (and it didn’t RAIN), and stood there for hours watching the parade and waiting for daughter’s band to appear so we could wave at her, yell her name, and take lotso pictures.

On the way back from the parade, we stopped at the George Store (that liquor store for you non-Washingtonians) for some banana rum and some vodka.

Got back home around four p.m; played horse with the neighbors, ran to the grocery store to get mixers for the booze and a couple of party trays.

At 6:00 p.m, went to next door neighbors home where we finger food and drank, and played a card came called 99. I lost forty dang dollars! Where’s my luck when I need it?! Got home around 1:00 a.m. and fell into bed.

So, just lotsa playing on Saturday and no real work accomplished. Do you think I made up for lost time on Sunday? Well, do you?
The answer is a big, fat NO. I wasn’t hung over, but I just felt very tired and lethargic. I played on the Straight Dope, did three loads of laundry, washed some dishes, and watched a lot of mind numbing T.V.

Oh, I also have to clean cat and dog puke. The cat ALWAYS pukes on the carpet. The dog, at least TRIES to make to to the back door, where there is vinyl flooring. Sometimes, though, he URRPS on the stairs, which means I have to break out the mini steam cleaner, decide that did a sucky job, break out the stain removers, spray the spot, blot the spot, decide that did a sucky job, break out the little steam cleaner again, still decide it looks sucky, and finally break down and drag out the big, herkin’ steam cleaner. Sigh…

40

,

Ummm, that’s ATE finger food. We did not finger our food. That’s just…wrong. :o

Preview wasn’t my friend today.