My Cat Shat Out a Three Foot Piece of Yarn

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Well, he didn’t just shit it out.
Nosirree bob. Ziggy needed a little, shall we say, assistance.

You see, at first, he was hopping around kind of funny. He would start, stutter, stop, lick his ass, repeat. I had the lights down low and I thought he was playing as he often does - he’s a very playful two year old Siamese - who is sometimes better described as crazy and/or retarded. I was kind of starting to enjoy watching his little antics, wondering, “What the hell is that crazy kitty doing now?”

Then I saw it.

Eight inches of evil rudely protruding from my dear kitty’s little virgin rectum.

“OH GOD! HIS INTESTINES!!!”

For a second there Ziggy had a good chance of losing his prized status as the sole presence in the living room with something coming out of his ass.

I jumped off the couch with the zeal of a special olympian and jammed the 300 watt halogen lamp up to full blast which of course further terrorized the poor cat and sent him scrambling for cover.

Trying to reclaim my cool, I called for Ziggy with a soft voice and followed him into the hallway where he said, “Help me daddy” and then he just flopped over onto his back (awwww).

“Ah, thank God, it’s just yarn. Gross.”

Well, no way in hell am I gonna grab brown yarn that used to white that has a four ounce turd stuck to the end of it with my bare hands, so I retrieved some seventy or eighty paper towels from the kitchen and began the delicate procedure. He hadn’t moved from hallway where he was now biting at the yarn and licking his probably tender butthole.

I held him down with my left hand, took the yarn in my handful of paper towels with my right, and gave a gentle tug.

“OWWWWWW!!!”

There was now twelve inches of stink string extending from Ziggy’s asshole, and at this point, Ziggy Is Pissed.

I followed him to the guest room and despite his protests and subsequent hissing I managed to extract the remaining length of yarn.

I showed it to Ziggy and he thanked me. He was chasing and terrorizing Miranda, our other 14 year old cat within minutes and obviously back to his old self.

The yarn topped out at approximately 30 inches and though I was tempted to save it for posterity and to show it to my future wife who slept through the whole ordeal, I instead sealed it in a plastic grocery bag and took it outside to the garbage.

All in all, it was a memorable experience, though one I do not wish to repeat soon. I once witnessed my mother extract a cotton ball from my childhood Lhasa Apso’s butt in almost the same fashion. I can only hope that one my children will carry on the proud tradition.

(Before I get flamed for amateur “surgery”, the yarn came out very easily and I would not have yanked it hard if there had been much resistance. I otherwise might have let nature take it’s course had it not been for the aforementioned four ounce turd stuck to the end of it which Ziggy was dragging all over house, and I would have taken him immediately to vet had the situation escalated.)

2

:eek: I suppose I get what I deserve for not figuring the “TMI” is implied. :eek: :smack:

3

“My Cat Shat…” automatically means TMI.

Actually, I chuckle when I think of your Ziggy being chased by 4 inches of his own stool, bouncing and bobbing along the hallway like cans tied to a newlyweds car. Hee hee.

He Zigged when he should Zagged, huh?

4

Well , my dog brought in a dead mouse to my kitchen today. Luckily he’s trained enough to “Drop it” when I tell him to. But , yuck, I live in a fairly urban area I dont expect dead wildlife in my kitchen

5

This thread is about why pulling, even gently, is not a good idea

6

Duly noted. This happened over a week ago and he’s still fine - so all’s well that ends well, in this case. If it happens again I’ll take the advice in that thread.

7

Been there, done that - learned to hide all string, rubber bands and bin-bag ties from felines.

8

You pulled crap from your cat’s rear end instead of letting nature take it’s course?!? :eek:
You, sir, are a braver man than I.

Tripler
Dude, if I knew the coding, I would have put an upside down question mark in the front of my sentence.

9

I once had to assist my cat in removing a strand of plastic Easter grass from his butt. (That was also the last time I ever allowed that stuff in my house!)

10

Nature takes a very dirty and unpleasant course when a spooked cat has poo-on-a-rope dangling from its arse

11

OooooKay…

(checks apartment for any string, yarn or other long skinny objects lying around)

12

The first six times I saw this thread I read “yarn” as “yam” and thought, “Man, that’s some giant sweet potato.”

13

Heh, my uncle’s cat brought in a RAT and proceeded to sit there on the floor and eat it head first like a burrito. Just left the tail!

14

pseudotriton ruber ruber Ohhhh so that’s where they get yams! What does this have to do with sweet potatoes? :wink:

15

My aunt’s (smallish) dog developed a blockage of some sort, and they took him in for X-Rays.

The scans showed a very large mass of unknown origin. They briefly debated whether it was worth surgery or if the dog should be put down, and decided on surgery.

It was a potholder.

With some animals, there’s no making them safe. They seem to have a death wish and will eat ANYTHING.

My mother’s dogs love insulin better than anything in the world. There was a famous near-death incident which involved swallowing a whole bottle, then going into insulin shock. He pulled through but never lost the taste for delicious insulin.

And yes, they keep the bottles in a drawer. The dog can open drawers. Looks like they’ll have to get a safe. Probably the dog can pick locks, too.

16

Shoot, Mama Tiger, you beat me to it – I too have had to do that once or twice. I know it’s a bad idea now, but I didn’t know then. Poor kitties.

And poor us. EWWWWWWWWWWW!!!

17

… About that hand-knitted sweater you were going to receive for Christmas …

18

I had this happen with my beloved Oops (who does everything she can to keep earning her name). About 14 Christmas’ ago, we noticed she had a long piece of tinsel stuck to her butt. I reached over to casuallly pull it off her, only, to my horror, to pull it out of her!:eek:
Fortunately, it did no damage, and we have never had tinsel in the house again.

19

I had a friend woken up one day from a heavy night of drinking by his cat running around his apartment raising hell. He walked into the living room and his cat had 14 inches of shit covered string out his ass that had basically been whipped against the couch, coffee table, rug, walls, tv, and everything else in the room.

Consider yourself lucky.

20

I’m igged-out that you evidently felt the need to measure this piece of string THREE TIMES!
TWICE while it was protruding from the hiney-end of your feline!

Yeeurrgh!