I don’t know if I’m complaining or bragging…
I hired her in my high-rise elevator about a year ago. I was between cleaning women (my last one was so unreliable I didn’t actually fire her, she just kept rescheduling at the last minute, or just not showing up, so I’d been doing my own cleaning maintenance for about a year–vacuuming, scrubbing floors, etc. when needed. As I’m a single guy, I have a high clutter-and-mess tolerance, and I mostly use a cleaning person to remind myself of my low standards in apartment maintenance.) Anyway, there was this really cute woman in the elevator I’d never seen before, so I made a little conversation, and it turned she was in the building to clean someone else’s apartment. “I need a cleaning woman,” I said, she gave me her card, and we set up an appointment for the next week.
My experience with cleaning women is that beauty is way down on a list of their most common attributes, but this one, I discovered, was the exception. She has an absolutely killer figure, one that you do a double-take on because it’s not quite clear how her slender waist meets up at first with her curvaceous hips. She has amazing muscle tone in her arms and calves without a shred of knottiness or bulges, she has a neck that’s long and delicate, she has beautiful hair and high cheekbones. I could stare at her all day.
Problem is, I don’t know when I’m staring too much. I have to let in my apartment, and pay her, and usually I run errands while she’s at work, but often those errands require my entering and leaving the apartment. I do I ask her if she needs anything–cleaning supplies, or a cup of coffee or something else from the store while I’m out–so I get to spend a fair amount of time engaging her in conversation when she’s here. Sometimes I’ll even work on my terrace when she’s cleaning my apartment (I’m a writer), and I’ll glance in through my window while she’s straightening up the living room.
Because I never noticed any of my prior cleaning women, I never did any recreational glancing at them before (I guess my previous recreation was NOT glancing at them any more than I absolutely needed to.) So I have no idea what the limits of normal behavior are. I’m trying not to make her uncomfortable (I need a good cleaning women much more badly than I need another girlfriend) yet I can’t really tell what level of personal interaction with her would consititute crossing the line of inappropriate behavior. I’ll often offer her a cup of coffee, if I’m making one for myself, and when we’re drinking it, I’ll talk her about personal stuff (she’s a recent immigrant, and I’ve told her things like how to register for ESL courses at the community college, or recommend books for her to read to improve her vocabulary, stuff like that) and I’m sure I don’t normally extend myself like this for my previous cleaning women with whom I’ve kept the chit-chat to an absolute minimum
This is an exercise in personal discipline for me. If I’ had met her socially (can’t really imagine how…), her beauty is such that I’d force myself to try to get to know her (or kick myself afterwards for not trying). I suppose this is similar to having an attractive co-worker, except most co-workers aren’t normally engaged in doing vigorous physical activity in plain sight. Or maybe it’s just the odd intimacy of ths person being in my house that’s taking some getting used to.
I’ll tell you though: this isn’t getting any easier to deal with. I figured maybe when I got used to the phenomenon of having Shania Twain in spandex (did mention that she wears this formfitting material to do her work in?) around the house every few weeks would be something that I’d just take for granted, but that hasn’t happened yet, and I don’t think it’s going to.
She’s supposed to clean my apartment in about an hour, and I’m still thinking “Mmmmmmm,” at about the same level of intensity that I’ve been feeling from the first time she worked here.
The world is full of attractive women, my friend.