I feel really really horrible. I work at a bank and she sits beside me and we spend the day chatting away between clients. She is my favourite work buddy. I feel so horrible. All numb and confused. I don’t know why I feel so bad. I don’t know why it’s bothering me so much. I guess I’m probably in some sort of shock. It seems like I shouldn’t feel so bad. I just feel all confused I guess. I don’t really know how to deal with it or what I’m supposed to think or do.
Sounds like shock to me indeed.
Take as needed once the shock starts wearing off: {{{{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}}}, some chocolate aaand here, a box of Kleenex. They’re the extra-soft kind, too!
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. We can get very attached to our coworkers and they can become good friends, even if we don’t see them outside of work.
If you feel you’re not up to working today, go and see your supervisor. You need some quiet time to digest this news, I’m sure.
This person definitely means something to you. You have my condolences.
Make sure you talk to someone if you need to - often we spend more time chatting with co-workers than with our families, so it’s natural for you to feel this loss.
If you need to cry go right ahead - just because they are a co-worker doesn’t mean they’re not also a big part of your life.
I’m sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry. We spend hours a day with our coworkers… more than we spend with our own families, sometimes. It’s only normal to become close to them, and to grieve when they’re gone.
For what it’s worth, I know exactly how you feel… a guy I worked very closely with for nearly two years died earlier this year. We never really hung out outside of work, but in the office we were such a tight-knit team that I jokingly called him my Work Husband. He’d transferred to a different office a few months before it happened and we hadn’t had many chances to catch up… but still, it felt like I’d been punched in the gut for the first few days after I got the news.
So yeah. She was a part of your life, even if it was only as a coworker, and there’s nothing wrong with grieving for that loss.
You feel bad because someone you like and care about is gone from this world forever. Grief is normal and you shouldn’t worry about whether or not it is right for you to grieve. It is not an emotion reserved for family members and close friends, and it is a tribute to your friend that you feel so bad at her passing. In addition, part of grief is mourning our own loss…the loss of her companionship, the loss of a comfortable work partner. I know if either of my coworkers died, I would be shattered. I’m so sorry that you have lost a friend.
Alternative theory:
This struck you so hard because it was an unexpected death and you feel like it could have been you.
Also normal, will pass with time, but it is appropriate for you to take a couple days off work, see a counselor or therapist, get a hug from your parent/child/SO/BFF and go back to work still a little off kilter.
Thank you so much for the replies. I feel slightly less frantic today. She was the nicest person at work and I was always happy when she was working because I knew the day would be filled with lots of blabbing. A lot of people at work didn’t like her because she was a bit nerdy, and smarter than most of them. She and I got along great though. I once complained to the manager because she was being treating so poorly by a couple of people.
I will really miss you, Charlene. Rest well.
Horrible, I lost a friend and coworker in May of this year and it has been very rough. I’m really sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry, FloatyGimpy. It’s never easy to lose someone that’s close to us. Take care.
Its hard losing anyone, especially someone you spend 40 hours a week with.
I’m sorry.