So I’m about to take my first business trip in several years, so I dust off my company-assigned corporate credit card that they send to every employee.
I call to make sure that I had activated it; I had, but it had been deactivated duue to inactivity. OK, that makes a little sense, I suppose the account costs the company a little just being open.
So, I send an email to the person in charge of the credit cards so she can get it activated. She goes ahead and gets the wheels in motion, thanks a bunch.
Then she sends me an email with the following policies that the company has regarding the credit cards:
The employee is ultimately responsible for all charges. No problem, the company reimburses the employee for all business-related charges, directly into the account. If you make a personal charge with the card, then you pay for it. Sounds fair.
The employee is not to use the card for personal reasons. Well, that’s a little stupid, but I have my own cards for personal stuff, no big deal. But if I’m ultimately responsible for the charges, why not let me use it for whatever I want?
The company requests that you use the card occasionally to prevent it from being deactivated. WTF? If I can’t use the fucking thing for personal charges, then what the skull-humping crusty cunt am I supposed to do with it to keep it active? Buy a pen every month, and fill out a reimbursement form for the 29 cents? Suck my ass-crack, you taint lickers. Try actually READING your policies for a change, and see if they make less sense than Ozzy Osbourne reciting William S. Burroughs after chugging a quart of LSD.