:rolleyes: Right, nine years from now when Scylla’s daughter tearfully screams, “fuck off and die, I hate you!” and proceeds to explain why she’s having promiscuous unprotected sex with IV drug users, stealing purses, and assaulting little old ladies it’ll be all the lies about the Mushroom Man that put her over the edge.
And the reason she’s not going to school anymore? Santa Claus.
Get a grip.
When my dad was about twelve, he was using a sling blade to clear weeds along an electric fence. This fence was what they called a “weed-burner” because if a weed fell across the wire, it would burn in half (sounds like a major fire hazard to me, but what do I know?). So there dad was working away when he was charged by one of the farm boars.
There are a couple of facts that make this more interesting. First, dad was still recovering from polio that he’d had four or five years earlier and which had paralyzed his left side. His left arm and leg were in braces for years. Second, he’s left handed, further cutting down whatever one-handed competance he possessed.
When that boar came at him, there was no question of running or getting over the fence. He probably couldn’t climb it even it wasn’t electric. For those wondering, even a domesticated boar can mess up a grown man. So dad raised that sling blade in his off hand and prepared his one chance. Just as he started to swing, the boar turned away. Anti-climatic now, but probably quite an exciting moment for poor little Hypno-Senior.
If she touches it again, will you give her $100?
I was feeling kid of oogy about the notion of a kid being raised in proximity to a potentially deadly fence, but that did make me laugh.
Is this repeatable? If I touch that fence 6 times a week, do I get $300? That could make for a nice allowance.
Sure she’s learned that her parents are liars - just like all those parents who tell their kids about Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, etc. etc. Just like all those kids, she’ll be absolutely fine.
I don’t think telling kids things in a way they’ll understand it is lying in the same way deliberately misleading someone is lying, even if what you’re telling them isn’t the literally the truth.
Saying something is “bad” and leaving it at that is too abstract for a small kid, IMHO. You have to come up with some concrete reasons - even fictional concrete reasons.
For example, when one of my kids was 4 or so, I was trying to explain to her why prison wasn’t a fun place and why nobody would want to be in one.
But lack of freedom doesn’t mean too much to a 4-year-old. Being told when you have to go to bed and get up is pretty much their life experience. So I wasn’t having much success communicating why prisons were considered undesirable. Until I hit on the fact that in prison they make you eat the same thing whether you like it or not.
“Like Spagetti-O’s?” she asked.
“Yes, I replied, in prison they make you eat Spagetti-O’s every day.”
She got it, and for a while she literally believed prisoners had to eat Spagetti-O’s. Now, she’s old enough to understand that that isn’t true, but was the way I communicated to a 4-year-old that prison is no fun. And she’s not turned into a drug addicted slut …yet.
I think the difference between these and Santa Claus, et al (which I support, BTW, I like Santa stories) is that this is directly about personal safety. She may (I won’t say does, 'cause I don’t know her, but she may) now think that the electric fence is perfectly safe, if ouchy.
I don’t know. In my experience with my kids, it’s been enough to say “The fence is dangerous and *may *hurt you very badly or even kill you if you touch it.” It’s true and it’s always been deterrent enough.
Really, this isn’t something I feel very strongly about. I’m not about to Pit Scylla for being a bad parent. I don’t think it’s necessarily bad. I said questionable, and I stand by it. For some kids, it’d be nothing at all. For other, more literally minded kids, it’s overkill and could cause undue fear and terror and doubt of parental authority. I don’t claim to know the best way to handle his kid.
Well said, Why Not --I never had to say more than “no, danger” when they were quite small and when a bit older a simple reason why. I don’t get the need to embellish with Mushroom Men etc. 
Oh, it won’t hurt her. When I was little, on long car trips my parents would tell me that if I didn’t settle down they’d put up a sign at the next rest area and sell me. Of course I totally believed them and tearfully begged to be made expensive. I only do the best crack these days, none of that strawberry flavored crap.
(Years later, when I was a teenager, my mom said something in passing about “Wasn’t it that funny, when we used to pretend we were going to sell you?” “FUNNY?!” They had no idea I didn’t know they were kidding.)
Then you better not think of where your food comes from when you go to the supermarket. Farms are full of dangerous things. They also have children on them. It’s been that way for ever, just that some of us have been able to escape from that reality due to our circumstances. An army buddy of mine was from a farm in Iowa. They kept loaded shotguns by the windows of the house in case of coyotes. How did he ever survive till adulthood?
I think it’s very sweet. She learned two lessons:
What that poor little dear went through all week…I hope you gave her ice cream.
I’d have given you a hundred dollars if you’d said that.
I had a co-worker once who told me about an experience almost the opposite of this one. Instead of thinking she was going to die, she thought she had killed someone.
As an eight year old their family had the great-grandmother living with them. The girl was helping this relative to wash her hair, but when she turned on the faucet over the lady’s head, it was too hot and the old woman exclaimed “Ouch!, that’s too hot!” A couple days later the old woman died in her sleep, and the girl thought she had helped off her great-grandmother by making the water too hot. She told me that for* years* she didn’t tell anyone, keeping the secret. I don’t remember how she finally figured out she was not to blame, but that must have been a heck of a burden.
Huh, where’s Bricker when you need him to lay down some odds on future events.
Scylla and his wife have tried to explain to the best of their ability the danger of the fence to their kid. Unfortunately the kid is four and isn’t smart enough to just listen. I guarantee you after gaining personal kid with such a fence the kid will never tempt fate with the fence again.
Out of curiotiosity, WhyNot, do you have kids?
But they didn’t lie. She is a goner. It is just a matter of time. Not because of the fence, of course.
Oddly, I don’t know a single person who has not had such a feeling. I think this is one of those childhood things, pretty universal–except, of course, for those kids who don’t survive the forbidden thing.
Yep. I’ve got a 13 year old son and a 15 month old daughter. I was a nanny/professional babysitter for a couple of years before my daughter was born, but mostly for newborns. Newborns are way easier than real kids!
And she’s 6, not 4. (“We have always warned my six year old about the electric fence.”) A 4 year old, I could maybe see exagerating ill effects to or telling tall tales. 6 years old is old enough for the truth about personal safety.
I feel like I’m coming across as a humorless, magicless rational grump here. That’s so not me. My kids and I leave out milk and honey for the fairies. We make up myths about El-hariarah for Easter. We put on passion plays together. I lead the children’s group for my religious circle, and we’re all about emotional and spiritual truths that aren’t factually the case. I just think personal safety is something that you should be very literal about or risk losing your children’s respect and obedience.
Remember: it’s never one big thing that drives a person over the edge, but all the little things.
Okay, that is just cool. 
Heh. I used to tell both of my kids from time to time that I was gonna take them back to Walmart and get a refund. My daughter finally wised up to the joke and one day told me quite matter-of-factly that I wouldn’t get a refund for her since she five and was used. 
Is the 50 mile unit really necessary?