My daughter was offered $55K to go to Oklahoma

My daughter, who just got accepted at Amherst, and is waiting to hear from MIT just got notified by Oklahoma State University that they will give her a $55K scholarship if she commits to go there. Guaranteed.

Now, my daughter never solicited this, nor did she ever show any interest in this school. Nor has this offer piqued her interest at all. The wife and I have told her she should go wherever she thinks is best for her, and the 3 of us will come up with the money. We still feel that way.

My quandary? What have I done to Okla SU to make them torment me like this??? Granted, Marian College of Fond du Lac, Wisconsin, continues to mail us with offers to waive her tuition, but they’ve had the decency to not put a dollar amount on offers we know we’ll decline.

To Okla SU: Thank you very much for your generous offer, but PLEASE do not bring this up again. Your offer just highlights my personal dichotomy between following one’s dream and having enough filthy lucre. Thank you.

That’s great Qadgop! Congratulations.
Most schools were paying me to stay away. I think your daughter is faring better. Does Oklahoma State have a decent reputation in her chosen field of study?

Well, gosh, does it have a disclaimer saying that the offer can’t be transferred? I’ll take it!

Who cares - she’d have to live in Oklahoma for 4 years. :stuck_out_tongue:

:d&r:

Your daughter must be an exeptional girl. A few months ago I was praying for an offer like this.
I don’t know about the rest of you until very recently I was losing sleep over how my husband and I were going to pay for our two 14-year-olds college, especially since one really wants to go to MIT and the other has waivered between NYU, Barnard (am I the only one who has trouble not saying “barnyard”?) and Princeton. My husband and I told them quite frankly, that they would need to get some sort of scholarship if they wanted to go there.

We have been saving money since before they were born, but it was no where near enough to cover 4 years at any of these schools. My wonderful aunt (who helped me by buying all my textbooks for the 4 years I put myself through college) left them each enough so that most of the pressure is off.

So-- Airman Doors and MsRobyn, evilbeth, beagledave and the rest of you dopers who are thinking of having kids: Start putting money away now. No! More than that!
[sup]Unless you are iindependently wealthy. If that’s the case, can you give me a few grand? Thanks in advance.[/sup]

unfortunately, the offer is non-transferrable. She’d have to go there to get it. And she has no intentions of going to Oklahoma.

All the schools she selected to apply to are such that they rarely give any academic scholarships. They can all fill their classes with students (and parents) who are willing to come up with the cash.

She is applying for many, many other outside scholarships, and I expect those will help defray the costs. But since she wants to study physics at a first-tier institution, she’s passing up a lot of free rides at other places that don’t meet her selection criteria. I’m all in favor of her doing so, it just causes me some cognitive dissonance to see these offers pass in front of us.

Hey! :stuck_out_tongue:

OSU is a good school, dammit. : grumble : 55K? Holy crap. For four years? What the heck is she studying? I’m still 20 hours from my degree, but I know my grand total for books and tuition isn’t going to be that much.

Besides, she would get to be near me. :smiley:

Well, Arden, I did 'splain to her about Eskimo Joe’s and all that, and how she’d be able to visit Yale (the Oklahoma town, not the university) too, but it didn’t sway her. What’s a father to do?

I got a similar offer from Iowa State University…they even filled out most of my application, I just needed to sign it!!! :eek:

Now, that was a difficult decision for me…I really didn’t want to go to Iowa, but they had what I intend/ed to study, and they were not bad at it either.

Luckily, my second-choice school offered me a good deal. Well, not them, but I got a National Hispanic Scholarship that is paying for all my studies.

My parents(mom, especially) said that I could apply to any place I wanted, they would do whatever they could and more if I got accepted and didn’t get money. I think that was a good attitude, even though I believe it would have been next to impossible for them to fund my college expenses.

Congrats on the offers your daughter is getting! You can always think that if she declines, then another more interested student will get the offer and make the most of it.

Qadgop the Mercutan writes:

> All the schools she selected to apply to are such that they
> rarely give any academic scholarships. They can all fill their
> classes with students (and parents) who are willing to come up
> with the cash.

Well, it depends what you mean by “academic scholarships.” If your daughter has applied to places like MIT and Amherst, nearly all of these places certainly do give people financial aid (generally a combination of scholarships, loans, and campus jobs), and this financial aid is offered to anyone who is accepted at the college. If the student comes from a working-class family that’s barely scraping by (not necessarily a truly poor one, just somewhere below comfortable middle-class standards), this could be large enough that it would pay for nearly all of the student’s tuition and room and board. And financial aid is usually available in smaller amounts even for students whose families are middle-class. Indeed, at some highly selective colleges, because the cost of tuition is so much, something like 75% of students get at least some financial aid.

But I guess you mean by “academic scholarships” ones which are awarded to students without any regard to their family’s financial situation. I’m going to have to guess here. I presume that since you’re a doctor, you’re at least reasonably well off. Did your daughter apply for financial aid at all the colleges she has applied to? Depending on how much you make (there’s a wide range of incomes for doctors), she would getting somewhere between nothing and some reasonable proportion but not nearly all of her tuition paid.

A lot of less selective colleges (like Oklahoma State, apparently) have realized that this gives them an opening by which they can recruit some top-notch students who otherwise might not have considered going to them. They offer full-ride scholarships to some students with top SAT’s and high school grades without any consideration to their family’s financial situation. (Incidentally, how did they find out about you daughter? Did they get her name, along with her SAT scores and grades, from the SAT people?) Now, who’s going to be tempted to take a scholarship like that? Not students from rich families, since their family has enough money that tuition costs aren’t enough to really bother them, so they can afford highly selective but expensive colleges. Not those from struggling working-class families, since they will be getting enough financial aid from those same highly selective but expensive colleges that they can scrape by there. (Their families will be hurting from the expense, but then they were hurting even without any college tuition to pay.)

No, these scholarships were created so that these less selective colleges can recruit top-notch students from well-off but not rich families who would otherwise go to highly selective colleges. These families have just enough money that they can afford the tuition at expensive colleges, but it would hurt to pay that much. The deal then is that colleges like Oklahoma State are recruiting students like your daughter by offering to let them go to a less selective college but pay much less than she would at a more selective college.

Is that a fair deal? I don’t know. You’re going to have to answer that yourself.

First, what an incredible offer out of the blue.

Secondly, I applaud you and your wife for allowing your daughter to chose where she wants to go and where she thinks she will be most happy and *get the most out of her college (and your dollar) experience *.

Thirdly, Oklahoma (the state not edu) per se will not make her unhappy or happy, it is she herself that choses to make the best of the situation.

Fourthly, Has she chosen a major?

Fifthly, Your daughter sounds like an incredible person to a) be accepted into such pristine and hallowed halls of education. I don’t think such tony places would allow my admissions application into their zip code :smiley:

Sixthly, Won’t it be lots of fun for your daughter to answer to the “what does your father do?” She can reply, " He’s in prison."

(To bad your wife isn’t into furniture refurbishing, then she could tell everyone, " Oh, and my mom is a stripper.")

Heh.

Keep us - the unwashed envious heathens - updated so that we may live vicariously through your intelligently successful progeny.

Wow, tres ambitious of your kids, Biggirl…Might I advocate Barnard? (hehe, I was accepted there in the winter.) Yeah, my friend delights in referring to it as barnyard. Anyway, good luck to you, and congrats to your daughter, Quadgop. I don’t know anything about Oklahoma, but I do know that it’s very difficult to get into Amherst.

Quadgop get her into MIT for phyics any way you can, even if you have to have anouther kid and sell it on the black market.:smiley:
She can always pay you back when she receives her first Nobel Prize.:cool:

I face a similar question

Some people offered me some very good advice in that thread, you should check it out.

Nice school, pretty campus.
The premium program at O-State is its engineering program. (Used to be Oklahoma A&M, back in the day)

Back when I went there, you still only had to be 18 to drink beer. I think you have to be 21 now. (It’s 3.2 beer, but it gets the job done ):cool:

I like Stillwater. It’s a nice town. If your daughter’s degree is going to be in engineering, it would be worth a look imho.

Well, her heart’s still set on pure physics at MIT. She’s not the engineering type. And she wants to keep up her language skills too; she’s fluent in spanish, but not quite there yet in russian or japanese or latin. MIT has a department of linguistics which fuses math with language theory, and she’s interested in pursuing that. So we’ll see what happens.

Financial aid is out of the question; the value of our family farm is too high. Unfortunately I’m not willing to sell it off to pay for her education, but I can take loans out against it. So she’ll end up at one of her top 5 choices, and I’ll bite the bullet and pay the bill, less whatever scholarships she’s granted. She’s earned the privilege of choice by the quality of her work thus far.

Talk up Princeton. With the other two, s/he’ll be coming home every night for dinner. Carrying a sack of dirty laundry.
– Uke, pushing for Stanford, which is on the other side of the continent

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Biggirl *
So-- Airman Doors and MsRobyn, evilbeth, beagledave and the rest of you dopers who are thinking of having kids: Start putting money away now. No! More than that!

QUOTE]

That is why we are planning for our daughter to do her tertiary education in Ireland, where it’s basically free!

John, the hub, did his undergrad and PhD for about $4,000 USD!

We are just hoping that the system of low-cost University remains intact long enough for her to get her degree(s).

I have a similar situation with my son, but with a few differences. He has been accepted to Washington University in St. Louis (ranked #14 in US News and World Report) along with a partial scholarship of $28,000 but the full cost of 4 years will cost $148,000. I can afford to pay the $120,000 but it will severly tax our budget and his mother and I will have to borrow most of it.

He also was awarded a full ride to Okla. State (he applied for the OSU scholarship). Although his mother, two uncles and a great-grandfather graduated from OSU he would like to go to a private university out of state (He is still hoping for Harvard).

My son wants to major in engineering. Is an engineering degree from Washington U. worth $120,000 more than an engineering degree from OSU?

He also is planning to go to law school. Will an undergraduate degree from Washington U. get him into a better law school than a degree from OSU?

Don’t know if this will help or not, but I’ll share it. I’ve been reading lately where students with scholarship offers have been able to negotiate better deals.

Just like buying a car. You call up the admissions officer and say (using this example), “My daughter received an offer of 55K to go to another school. Anything you can do?”

Admittedly, it might not work, but a “no” never hurt anyone, and you will certainly brighten the day at someone over at MIT, once they stop laughing.