What is the best, high quality, top shelf, snobby-assed rum?
For dark rum, I like Ron Zacapa 23-year-old. Also good is Zaya.
Hunter, didn’t you help me with alcohol questions before? I appreciate your help. I’m like a new born drinker, just learning to take my first staggers, and you are a proud papa.
Karl, I don’t know…are you giving me the most snobbishy rum possible? I don’t just want quality, I want something that makes an pretentious asshole say, “Well done, indeed!” I ask if you are giving me something snobby, because I notice it is much cheaper than the other suggestions here.
Also, I want quality, since I will be trying it, too.
Devilsknew, I’m not in the money, but the person footing the bill is!
Ah, I see.
Indeed, it’s not snobby. Just good.
(BTW, if you’re after ‘snobby’, why not go for a Scotch. Lots of snobby Scotches to choose from.)
As is Cruzan Aged Rum. Any fool can spend a lot of money, but rum drinkers know that Virgin Island rum is far superior to that Puerto Rican slop.
Snobby enough for ya?
I don’t know my scotches from my rums. But this stuck up asshole* specified that I am to get the very best rum, not scotch. He told me he will give me the money and I am to bring the very best. Trust me, when he says best, he is speaking from a snob’s perspective!
*This particular stuck-up asshole is a great friend of mine. I use the term with much affection.
Go with one of the ones I recommended. They’ll have a higher snob approval rating than the others in the thread. I’m actually quite fond of both Mount Gay and Cruzan rum (I haven’t tasted Appleton enough to become familiar with it), but the RZ or Zaya would be more what you’re looking for in this case.
ETA: They’re also both genuinely very good, not just snobby. Mount Gay and Cruzan are my go-to rums for everyday use, but RZ or Zaya are for more special occasions. The Mount Gay Sugar Cane Rum has a similar flavor profile to them, but a more accessible price point; I highly recommend it.
My everyday rum is Goslings Black Seal, which is well-thought-of enough for liquor distributors to be impressed when I mention it. I haven’t tried Goslings Gold is nice but much lighter, and I haven’t tried Goslings Old, but if I hear it’s top notch.
I recently switched out my Goslings for a bottle of Flor De Cana, and it has proved very nice as well, it also has a classier looking bottle. Zaya is classier looking yet, tasty but maybe a little too smooth for my tastes. I gets my rum reviews here: http://www.bilgemunky.com/
My favorite rum is Ron del Barrilito. It’s a local Puerto Rican rum, not hoity toity at all, but damn good.
Go to BevMo, sort their rum list by price and pick the one at the top of the list. 
I don’t know anything about rum but, if he offered to pay for it, you might as well go all out.
does anyone even drink rum straight up?
imo tasted the difference in a blended drink (even if just with ice, sugar, and mint) requires such a delicate palate that it’s often not worth the splurge.
I drink rum straight up. Gosling’s Black Seal normally.
I have gotten out of the habit of mixing anything with any drink. Not even ice as a rule.
I don’t want to be that person that comes into a nice little upscale cocktail party draped in multiple furs, huge jewels and a diamond encrusted crown while people look down their monicles and exclaim, “Well, I never!”
Da Big Mon say, you comin for they day, don’ forget a rummm…
da price today, no matter what to pay, Don’ forget a rummm…
da time to play, sittin on da bay, Don’t forget a rummm…
Reggaeton on da watta, Appleton on da matta, gunjun on da altta.
Don’t forget the Rummm…
I would like to think that pirates do, but I could be wrong.
ETA: I used to take double shots of the stuff. But one time, horrifically drunk, I spit out half my shot of Cruzan 120 on some fellow partygoers. I still don’t know how that happened: I was drunk enough that it should have tasted just fine.
Fuck it, if ya wanna get hardcore- Just bring a bottle of Bacardi 151, a bottle of SoCo, and a 6 pack of Dr. Pepper. Mix them in equal amounts and get freaky with a crackho.