First of all, i’m not saying “my friend” when i mean “me”.
I have this friend who has lived all his life not really exposed to black people and when he visited Atlanta last fall he told me he couldn’t help but be afraid of them. Also, he happens to be one of the whitest people you’ll ever meet. As far as I can tell he is mostly liberal and a little bit too PC at times.
He says he can’t help it and he doesn’t want to be afraid of them, but he can’t really help it. Maybe it’s some sort of phobia? Xenophobia?
Is it their portrayal on the media or something? I mean this guy has never really had contact with black people and I have no clue why he should be afraid of them.
So is he inherently racist?
I doubt racism is “inherent.” But if he’s not used to being with Black people, he may feel uncomfortable simply because they’re an unknown quantity (and, as a liberal, he doesn’t want to do anything offensive).
It’s not necessarily racist. My daughter’s best friend is Black; but when she was in New York City, she was frightened by Black people she saw on the street.
I wouldn’t say so- I am black and raised in a mixed community, But when I moved to maine where there was 1 black person for every 500 miles, I was scared. really no reason to be- compared to alot of my friends I have not run into a whole lot of racism( even though the worst time was in maine) I think it has more to do with comfort, Even though being around a room full of black people makes me nervous too, I would probably be more comfortable there, or with other minorities than a room where I am the only black face. Hope that makes sense. I don’t think that makes me racist at all( I hope)
Not to get all Yoda or anything but, as he said “Fear is the
path to the Dark Side. Fear leads to Anger. Anger leads to Hate. Hate
leads to Suffering.”
It’s something you have to try & remain vigilant against. This tendancy to fear the unknown or different has been the reason for, or been exploited in order to bring about every great atrocity humans have ever inflicted against each other.
Fear isn’t all bad tho. It kept our ancestors from stumbling into Sabre Toothed Tigers. The extra alertness it brings can keep you alive in lots of truly dangerous situations.
It depends on what you mean by racism. Does your meaning includde something bad/wrong? if so then no. Or does it mean something neutral, then yes.
If you want an exapmle of how racism can be neutral, IF you don’t want to date outside you race, you could be called racist but there is nothing wrong with this personal choice.
Look at the crime statisitics. Look at the prisons. It’s not a big secret that blacks comprise the majority of these stats. No, I don’t have a cite, I just watch the news, and read the paper. But to wonder if someone is racist because they are uncomfortable around blacks seems a bit extreme. What were the circumstances? Was it a social gathering, with a mixed crowd, or a stop at the 7/11, at midnight, where they were “hangin’ out”?
Before anyone attacks Bandanaman for pointing out crime stats, remember that Jesse Jackson himself said that if he is walking down a street at night and hears footsteps behind him, he is relieved if he turns around and sees that it is a white person.
…Of stupid people. It’s mostly my contact with them in all kinds of places that causes me to fear them. They tend to drive badly, make unthinking moves, leave firewall ports open and SQL servers unpatched, insist upon cookies or javascript. They drink too much and hit their children. They force their women and populations into near slavery through lack of education and freedom of choice, they allow former criminals to gather Total Information Awareness without complaining and their Supreme Court to elect the president…
Prison is no joking matter. I did my time, and I’m not proud of it, but sh*t happens. Some guy, and his buddy, tried to take my wallet while I was in college, and he didn’t make it. My fault apparently, trying to protect myself, but I’d do it again.
The best cure is exposure to more black people, until he starts thinking of us as individuals and judging us on that basis.
An example from my own life: before entering college, I had had pretty much zero experience with being around Middle Eastern-looking males. When I got to college, I was honestly scared of them. It was something I had never felt before and I hated myself for it. But in about two weeks, I started seeing them as people and the feeling vanished. Instead of seeing ‘scary Middle Eastern male’, I just saw ‘person’.
Years ago I went to a black barber shop becuase the one I usually went to was closed and this one was the only one open on sunday. When I went in there I was more nervous than a long tailed cat in a room full of rockingchairs. However I continued to go there becuase they did such a good job on cutting my hair. (Black barbers are the best at giving fades) Now, many years later I continue to go there and I don’t feel the least bit uncomfortable nor do they. As a matter of fact they all have got to know me so well that sometimes they will even start “ranting” about the “white man” with me sitting right there! Or they will crack jokes like “hey look! its our one and only white customer… you gotta lotta balls comming in here boy!”
Its all good though… hell we’re kinda like family.
[side note]
Even though I’m a baldy now I still like to go there and treat myself to an old fashioned shave. (with the straight razor) Man those are the best!
That’s odd because that’s was exactly what I thought racism was. A black guy being followed by the owner in a store because the owner’s afraid he’ll steal something. Or a black guy not getting hired for the same reason. Or maybe not getting hired because the manager assumes he’s lazy. I thought that’s what racism was. Guess not.
But I’m not saying other people who are uncomfortable around black people are racist. It’s just that my friend’s afraid of them, and I’m wondering if that’s racist. I mean the situations I mentioned above seem racist to me, and it’s a result of fear to an extent.
