We all have the “friend” who e-mails you the endless stream of jokes, chain letters and other general crap. Mine, a co-worker, forwarded this along to me this today:
I read the e-mail.
I stared blankly at my monitor, trying to understand what I was reading.
I read it a second time, and clarity hit me. In a fit of rage, I raced to the sender’s cubicle.
“Who have you been talking to?!” I demanded.
“Have you been spying on me??” I asked, frothing.
He stared at me, uncomprehending. The terror and confusion in eyes told me – this one knows nothing of my terrible secret.
I want back to my desk and read the e-mail a third time.
And I understood.
And I wept.
I wept the tears of joy that only the loneliest of the lonely can weep, when finally met with a familiar face.
I am alone no longer.
For I, too, am an organizer of M&M Mortal Kombat.
I’m not the only one who can be found hunched over his desk pretending to work, surreptitiously organizing my candy-coated warriors into brackets, preparing them for the deadly battleground they will soon face.
I’m not the only one spending far too much time devising rules for these tournaments (combatants must be face-to-face, the “m” logo side being the “face”).
I’m not the only one sitting there, squeezing two chocolaty warriors in a pinch of death – trying to determine that perfect moment when a victor is obvious, but before they both wind up exploding, spraying M shards all over my cubicle.
There is someone else out there, just…like…me.
Oh, except I’m not about to mail any of my champions back to the good people at the M&M Mars. No, the champions of the anonymous e-mailer’s league gets a much different fate than those of mine – my champion M ascends to the top of the towering container of raisins on my desk (I don’t only snack on junk food). There he will sit triumphantly, basking in the glory of his victory, master of all he surveys. Until I feel like snacking on chocolate again.
Then he gets eaten too.
So this whole experience got me wondering. In what way are you insane? What is it that you do that is so completely off the wall, that there’s no way anyone else shares your particular quirk. Bet’cha you’re wrong in thinking that.