I can’t say how sorry I am for you and your family. You’re all in my thoughts.
I’m sorry. I always hate hearing news like this especially because I can relate (I’ve had 5 mc’s). Take good care of yourself including lots of pampering.
Firstly, many commisserations Lady Venom. Nothing sucks more than losing a wanted baby.
Secondly though, your surgical team sound like morons. How could they not manage a D & C ‘because of the shape of your uterus’? Why does the shape or position make any freakin’ difference to a bunch of interns rummaging around in your internals?
And sending you home to cope with all of this alone? Sorry, something is really amiss here. Advising you to wait a month with a dead foetus inside is not good at all.
Please get a second opinion.
A D&C is not an internal procedure - that is, they didn’t cut open her uterus through her abdomen like a c-section, they’re trying to get at the inner lining of it through the cervix. So if the uterus has a horn or bulge or is bifurcated, or even just takes a really sharp turn just past the cervix (called “anteflexion” if it curves forward and “retroflexion” if it curves backward), a D&C can be very hard or impossible to do safely.
We’re not really shaped like anatomic drawings - those are smoothed out “averages”, not real organs. The uterus isn’t always a smooth pear sized sac of muscle.
I’m afraid “letting nature take its course” is not an uncommon strategy here. It’s also, of course, incredibly hard on the woman and everyone who loves her.
kambuckta - Thank you for your concern, but Whynot is right. My uterus is shaped like a C because of a large fibroid pushing it from behind. The fetus is up at the top of that C, making it nearly impossible to get to.
I’ve had many doctors look at this issue, including my fertility doctor.
That all being said, when the miscarriage finally happens, we are going to remove the fibroid before trying again, if I don’t end up with a hysterectomy, that is.
Lady Venom I am so saddened for you. Perhaps your team might be open to another trial of mifepristone and prostaglandins? It is sometimes possible to go up to the maximum dose if the first attempt doesn’t work.
kambuckta- your comments were not helpful, because you aren’t speaking from a position of knowledge, either of gynae surgery in general, nor of Lady Venom’s anatomy in particular. In this particular case I doubt very much whether interns would have been involved at all, as it sounds extrememly complicated, and the surgery itself was risky.
There is very little physical risk to maternal health unless pregnancy tissue is not expelled or re-absorbed within 4 weeks, hence the advice to come back in a month. The main risks are infection and clotting disorders and to some extent blood tests and antibiotics reduce these risks even further.
Psychologically this waiting time is very unpleasant, but it looks as if all the alternatives were explored and Lady Venom is able to cope with this agreed plan of expectant management (for which I can only admire her fortitude).
Thanks irishgirl. We had considered another round of the meds they were using (Cytotec) but we didn’t want to stress my uterus out too much and cause more bleeding. I think once my uterus has shrunken down (which is already has) nature will take its course. At the time of my first miscarriage, from diagnosis of no fetal heartbeat to actual miscarriage was almost 2 weeks. My body just doesn’t seem to want to get rid of pregnancies.
I didn’t want to have to miscarry on my own, which is why we opted for the D&C in the first place, but I guess my body has other plans.
Also, you are right. I had exceptional care in my primary high risk OB/GYN. She wasn’t the one who performed the D&C in the first place, and I’m sure had I gone to the right hospital, a D&C wouldn’t have been done given my strange anatomy.
I’m so sorry. That’s a horrible experience to go through.
We’ve been ttc our second for nearly three years with no luck. Infertility sucks.