My Impression of a bad Great Debates topic

Inspired as I am in all things by Alphagene, and impressed by his “bad MPSIMS” thread here in the Pit, I feel compelled to post this. Please enjoy my (very) thinly disguised parody of an actual “discussion” going on in the Great Debates forum. Please feel free to compare and critique with 6 Billion?
OP: The population of the world is growing much too quickly! The earth can’t support us all for much longer! We have to control the population!

About a dozen respondents: Well, no. Actually, it’s not, it can and we don’t. The population of the world is growing much less quickly than you think it is. Birth rates are down so far that some even believe that the population, if left alone, will decline over the near term because of declining birth rates. <font color=“blue”>Here</font> and <font color=“blue”>here</font> and <font color=“blue”>here</font> are links where you can learn more.
OP: But the population is exploding! We’re gonna run out of stuff!

About six respondents: As we mentioned, the population is not exploding. Further, you should know that the earth can support many more people than we have now, because it’s a big place and we are a clever lot. We agree that more care needs to be taken with resources, but there is no magical population level at which we’ll run out of food, living space, potable water or anything else. <font color=“blue”>This</font> and <font color=“blue”>that</font> and <font color=“blue”>the other</font> are more links for you.
OP: But the population is exploding. We have to control the population!

Three respondents, each with the patience of Job: As we mentioned, the population is not exploding. And “controlling the population” is an awful idea. Why? Because the population is not growing from of an explosion of births. Rather, once born, people are increasingly stubborn in their refusal to die. Mortality rates across all age groups are down throughout the world, and people are living a lot longer. That is the only reason that populations are increasing. Ergo, the only way to “control population” is to start killing off some of these stubborn people. We think that is a terrible idea. Have we mentioned the links to <font color=“blue”>Q</font> and <font color=“blue”>E</font> and <font color=“blue”>D</font>?
OP But we’re running out of fish!

Thank you. Coming next week, the “Lets spend 300 posts defining terms” parody.

Three stinkin’ slashes. That’s all it woulda took. Dammit. Can someone please add my lousy slashes?

Manhattan, if you’d been around on the AOL board, this wouldn’t surprise you at all. In fact, what would surprise you is the apparent increase in the OP’s IQ. I’d put the jump at about 40 points, but IQs being the inaccurate measurement that they are, it might be more.


Here borrow these. / / /
Now this wouldn’t be based on any real, live, existing threads now would it manhattan??

I stayed out of the population thread because I really am an idiot when it comes to stuff like that.

It is by the fortune of God that, in this country, we have three benefits: freedom of speech, freedom of thought, and the wisdom never to use either.
Mark Twain


You forgot to show the OP pasting in alarmist letters from the Sierra Club, the Zero Population Growth society, and National Geographic editorials.

Good, but you forgot this:
OP: I have factoids and links that say that I’m right. However, you continue to disagree with me. Therefore, you are ignorant. I have cited the same facts many times, but you have not conformed to my opinions. Therefore, you are close-minded. And you do not fit the profile of the paranoid liberals that dominate all media today. Therefore, you are an ignorant close-minded pigheaded Neo-Nazi. And your mother is a whore.
Respondant: Hey, I just have a different viewpoint… isn’t that what this is all about…?
OP: Listen, my brother, best friend, nephew, second cousin, great uncle, and mailman have all been touched by the overpopulation problem. I know first hand the destruction that it can cause. Do you? I didn’t think so. I have experience, you don’t. I am not saying that that makes your viewpoint invalid, but I certainly am implying it. So why don’t you go out and smoke some overpopulation, then you can come back and argue.

Whoops. A little Freudian slip in that last line. Take it to mean what you will…

The IQ of a group is equal to the IQ of the dumbest member divided by the number of people in the group.

Alphagene, that is so perfectly on target!

Just as a sidelight, Cessandra started a thread on witnessing (the religious thing) in GD. It occurred to me that there is a strong similarity: “I’m going to prove to you that I’m right; don’t bring up those irrelevant facts!”

Yes, problem.
No, running out of room.
Yes, soiling the ‘nest.’
No, those with higher intelligence usually practice birth control, while the ignorant masses continue to breed like rabbits in heat. What does that say for the geographical average intelligence curve?
Yes, pollution because of too many people taking up too much space.
Yes, wars because of the ‘rats in a maze’ concept and the ‘crowding’ concept i.e.: too many people get on each others nerves and start fighting. Population drops, peace is resumed, then the survivors breed like hell and the cycle starts all over again.
Solution: Get into space, young man and find new worlds.

“Think of it as Evolution in action.”

Spoken like a true Nivenite, Mark!

Too bad the debate didn’t go that way. Unfortunately, the FROMATE wouldn’t listen.

Colonizing another planet would do nothing to curb population growth on Earth. It would, however, spread us out over a large enough region that, should a humongous killer asteroid wipe out all life on one planet, the other planet would be able to continue the human species.

Polycarp, Manhattan posted the thread as an inspiration from Alphagene. Just felt the need to give credit where it’s due.

Manhattan, brilliant, except you forgot the part where someone gets really angry about an issue that isn’t close to his heart and starts swearing up a storm.

I’m sorry to see the topic has turned into another crappy argument. sigh I’m going to stay out of this one.

Formerly “Melanie the Computer Idiot”

Ah, where’s Ben Abbatte when you need him?

“Its fiction, but all the facts are true!”

SterlingNorth admits:

Well, learn then, dammit.
All of us (with the possible exception of Unca Cecil) were born ignorant, and had to be educated out of it. I am not an exception to this rule.

Thank you. This has been a public service announcement. We now return you to your regular thread, already in progress.

But we’re running out of fish! :slight_smile:

I’ve seen the error of my ways. I repent

I will no longer wallow in my own ignorance like a swine!

I will no longer impress apon you all my half-assed theories and ignorant ramblings!

I have seen the light.


<font size="+2">May I have an “AMEN” my brothers?</font>

<font size="-1">Hello?

eh, sorry, wrong revelation.
Hello, I’m SterlingNorth and I’m a alcoh… I mean, an ignorholic.

I bow to your superior intellect and wisdom, O Knowledgeable One.

Of course, Akats, that’s exactly why I’m here.
Just because I don’t post something in a thread doesn’t mean I’m not reading the thread and learning from it.

But I’m sure you knew that, O Enlightened One!

Could you bow a little lower, Sterling, or would that mean having to buy a thinner carpet? :slight_smile: