My Monday morning RueDeDay post.

Where in h-e-double-hockey-sticks is it, bub?

Lilek’s Bleat is on hiatus until Thursday, and he’s reorganized his website (again) to eliminate the link to his “Backfence” column, and now I have to search, which irritates the heck out of me…

So, all I had to really look forward to this morning as I trudged into work was a first-rate, clever, enjoyable Rue post.

I didn’t get it. And I’m disgruntled.

Step up and explain yourself, punk.

Yeah, what Exgineer said.

Where it at?

Oh, crap! Lilek is on hiatus!?! Well, that’s one link I don’t have to check today.

I do believe Rue’s last thread mentioned something about him being away and gone for a Monday post. I’m not sure if he was going to be out of town on a Mystery Tour or vacation, or if he was just going to be distracted by the family and holidays.

Funny how we come to expect certain things, isn’t it??

I happen to know that Rue is being a bum - something about quality time with the Little Woman and Soupo and Katcha. Yeah, like they deserve special attention. They get to see him every cotton-picking day - you’d think they could cut him some slack to give us the Monday morning post we so richly deserve!

Da noive of some people!!!

[sub]whimper whimper[/sub] Come back, Rue!!

He’s obviously getting soft in his old age. I can see it now: a dazed Rue, wandering around in a bathrobe by the interstate, mumbling incoherently about the location of his “picnic ape.” It’s a sorry state of affairs.

Watch it, junior.

I’m gonna’ be “almost as old as Rue” in about two weeks. I still have all of my faculties, so I’m not about to accept the age excuse.

Now pass me my tapioca, and find my keys for me. There’s a good lad.

I stole him.

AND THEN I HID HIM. YOU’LL NEVER FIND HIM.

[sub]He’s in my pocket.[/sub]

Hmm. I always pictured Rue as a little bit taller than that.

You must have DEEP pockets!!

Dangit, Francesca!

YOU PUT HIM BACK! Right this minute!

Put him back just where you found him, in front of his computer. I’m not going to tell you again.

Don’t make me come over there and give you a spanking.

Well, she can’t get far. No airport security terminal in the world will let her get through with a loaded Rue in her pocket. And we can be sure he’s loaded, because how else would she have convinced him that running away and leaving us cold and alone was a good idea?

[sub]Do I have to?[/sub]

Well shee-men-EE, people! Not only do I have to spend… I mean GET to spend a little extra time with my family, get a brand-spanking new Costco membership (they sent me a coupon while Sam’s Club left me high and dry) AND save the freakin’ World, plus swing by Jungle Jim’s to pick up some party food for tomorrow (some Stroopwaffles, a little jar of Marmite, a loaf of sourdough bread for said Marmite, a tube of International Smarties and a bottle of Moxie Cola) I have to have my regularly scheduled Monday Morning Post too?

And I’m soooo comfy here in Puddin’s pocket. I made a little nest out of the lint and there’s some hard candy down here too…

Well, no more MMP’s for you people. Until maybe next week. Yeah, that’ll teach you.

Except for Jester. Ain’t nuthin’ gonna teach that boy. He’s just not right.
-Rue. (no, it isn’t)

In the meantime, reacquaint yourselves with some of Rue’s previous stories.

See? He LIKES it in there. That’ll learn you!

[sub]I wrote a story on that Teemings page too proud[/sub]