I’m happy for you. It sounds wonderful. How are the cats taking the move, are they being used to being indoor cats?
Thanks for the update! and glad things are going so well.
(And yes – is there a Cat Report? Though the news looked good on that front (those fronts?) when you last posted about them.)
Hooray! Thank you for the update!
I’m so glad you’re enjoying it! I must say, I think a lot of it is your attitude. You had an abrupt and dramatic change forced on you, and you took a remarkably short pause to rage and mourn that upheaval before moving on and making positive steps towards a good solution. In your shoes, I’d still be doing quite a bit of sniveling about it and probably would be missing out on a lot of the good things about the new arrangement.
Congratulations on such a smooth and happy transition!
On your next update, please let us know about your computer/television access. As I recall, there was a bit of a discussion about that during your move.
Otherwise, I’m jealous. Sounds like a wonderful spot for you!
Checked back in here and am glad you’ve adapted so well to The Home; better than we have, I think, as we really don’t socialize much. I’m sure people think we’re just antisocial or something, but I’ve never cared much about what people think of me in the past, so don’t intend to start now. I’m friendly to people on our floor, but other than exercise classes don’t get much involved with other people. I’m not unfriendly, just not a “joiner”. They show movies that are mostly antiques and stream concerts that are primarily classical music and would leave me comatose. The did stream a Lincoln Center Jazz Orchestra concert the other day that we went to hear. The current events discussions are mostly Trump- or Republican-bashing sessions and I don’t need any spikes in my blood pressure. I get enough of that from the TV news.
Part of our problem, as it has been in the past, is that we’re not local and we’ve traveled pretty extensively and lived abroad for some years. People in general can’t relate to it. Most people we talk to here were born, raised, worked and lived here all their lives, some nearly within walking distance. I mentioned to the building manager that we had lived in Uganda and she hastened to inform me that she had sponsored a child from Uganda “who goes to church and to school”. I asked if the child lived in Kampala and she got a vaguely confused look on her face that told me she has no idea about the country or its people.
Anyhow, enough of that. Glad you’re fitting in well.
When my late aged MIL moved into an independent living facility in suburban St. Louis MO she had the same reaction. She was about 80. She was no great world traveler, but she had lived in more than one US state and had spent time as a working single Mom, not just as a homemaker on a farm. Probably half the residents rarely had left their home county during the active era of their lives. Most had grown up within 20 miles of the place at a time when that was pure farmland.
She left there after a couple years to move out to a normal apartment on the economy and was much happier on the outside. She did benefit from her time inside as they fed her adequately while we addressed her various long-ignored medical needs. But once she was re-energized she was so done with that noise. You might be too.
A decade later she re-entered Independent living here in suburban greater Miami. She was older, they were older, the economic strata was about the same, but the residents were utterly different socially. Lots of NYC folks. Much more worldly. Many more women who had worked, not been farm housewives. etc. Lots of people had done lots of traveling. She fit in with this new crowd a lot better.
We’re here because we have family in the area. Otherwise, I would never have picked the Midwest for my home, let alone as my last resting place. I really crave having the mountains in my eyes and the ocean not far away. Ah well, so it goes.
Ouch!
Right after my husband died, I posted for several years on a support-oriented message board at widownet.org. Tremendously helpful! There were forums for different categories-- like widows with young children, people whose spouses/partners had been chronically ill for decades, people whose partners had committed suicide, etc. There was one forum called “Ambivalent Grief.” This was for people (most often women) whose partners had been abusive, either physically or emotionally, maybe drug/alcohol addicts, and also for those who discovered after the partner’s death that he had had multiple affairs, maybe other children, even other families (cf. Charles Lindbergh). Ambivalent grief, indeed!
They seem to be okay. You wonder what’s really going on inside those little furry heads. Considering both of them used to spend all day outside, coming and going at will, it’s hard to believe they would adjust so well. EC tried once to go out the front door of the apartment, but since then, she seems to have lost interest. I wish they got along better. The last week or so, I’ve tried letting both of them in the bedroom at night to sleep with me. With varying degrees of success. Sometimes EC gets rambunctious in the middle of the night and I have to put both of them out of the bedroom. If I just put EC out then she and Tikva get on either side of the bedroom door and poke at each other through the little space at the bottom.
This morning I was awakened by serious dampness around my legs and my first thought was that it was me-- NO! NO! SAY IT ISN’T SO! Well, it wasn’t so. EC had thrown up in the bed and gotten the hem of my nightgown soaked. I knew pretty quickly that it wasn’t pee by the smell-- or lack of. It smelled like kibble. My immediate reaction was to try to figure out how to get myself into the shower and the sheets into the washer (down the hall) simultaneously! That has never happened before with any cat I’ve ever owned. I sure hope it never does again. I am going to be nervous when I go to bed tonight. I may try making the bowl of kibble inaccessible at bedtime and hope EC doesn’t bug me because she’s hungry. She prefers wet food, which I feed her several times a day, and has never done well on kibble. However, Tikki prefers kibble. And it goes without saying that I live only to service their whims.
Thanks for your endorsement. The thing is, I felt so angry at my landlord and so betrayed that I wanted to get out of there as soon as possible. Also I had paid my rent through Feb 2024 and the sooner I got out, the more $$ I’d get back from him. I am the sort of person that when inevitability is staring me in the face I will lunge forward to encounter it-- for good or for ill. Some might even call me impulsive.
I don’t want to reread my past posts, so I don’t know if I said that eventually the Spectrum guy came and set up both TVs. He was great. I wound up giving him a Weber Grill Everything Cookbook that I got for Christmas last year since he said he loves to barbecue and I (sniff) don’t have an outdoor grill anymore. I gotta say, I sure haven’t missed much by not having cable service! If it weren’t included in my lease, I’d never pay extra for it. I set up an indoor antenna (Mohu) for the TV in my bedroom to pick some extra OTA channels. I’m still using my T-Mobile Gateway for internet when I’m in the apartment-- completely satisfactory. I can pop on to the facility’s wifi if I go somewhere else on the premises-- like if I took my kindle to the dining room.
@Chefguy & @LSLGuy I believe that people in the Midwest are much more provincial than people in Texas-- at least in the major cities in Texas. Part of it is because everybody has to drive great distances for hours to get anywhere. You’re not likely to meet someone who has never been out of their town or neighborhood-- even if it’s a small town. In the case of San Antonio, maybe it’s the presence of so many military retirees from all over. I do meet people at The Home (and other places) who are from here, but who have also lived elsewhere and have traveled widely.
Another upside: seeing the same people every day means you have someone to share the little trivialities and anecdotes of everyday life with. Like the EC story from this morning. That’s not a big enough event to warrant a call to my out of town friend. It’s the kind of thing you tell your roommate or coworker. Unless you live alone and have no one to tell. But this morning I saw one of my new besties when she took her dog out for a walk and shared my story. These little chats and exchanges are the lubricant of everyday life and my life alone had been pretty gritty these last few years.
@ThelmaLou: Yaay about everything. Except the cat barf. But it does make for an entertaining story after the sheets (and you) are washed. 
IMO/IME the big difference is city size. Somebody from rural Texas is just as provincial as someone from rural MO or MN. But you have to go out there to meet those folks since they’re sure not coming into central San Antonio or Dallas to meet you.
The hard cases are the freshly built edges of full-bore suburbia that 15 years ago were exurb and 30 years ago were hard-core rural. That’s where suburbanites who may have lived or traveled all over the world run into folks who’ve never left the county and who are feeling betrayed that it got built up and ruined before they died.
Oh, yeah. I understood you were stuck nearby for the duration due to family. And not exactly overjoyed at that reality.
But perhaps you’re not exactly stuck in that one facility. MIL was an example of someone who dipped in and out of IL as her physical needs ebbed and flowed. The fact you two can still drive makes living on the economy more practical. To the degree you’re actually in / near greater Minneapolis, the city center is a lot more cosmopolitan than are the far flung burbs or worse yet satellite small towns. Which difference is why I chose to mention MIL’s story at all.
Well, I agree. Glad the cats are overall settled even with cat barf. But as a senior cat owner told me when I first ended up subject to the Great Cat Collective, cats are going to barf. And nothing to date has been worse than when one of mine, with malice and premeditation (I think) looked at me with feline glee and puked into my 2 day old (to me) sneaker. They KNOW!
But glad all is going smoothly. And that the balance of company and being able to be alone when YOU want is being met. And of course, saving a ton of money is always nice! You should set some aside for emergencies (of course) but set another chunk of savings aside to splurge on something nice, maybe a new kindle, a daytrip, or whatever sparks your fancy! You’ve earned it after all.
That’s not your problem, that is theirs. I’m sorry that they neither have the imagination nor the experience. Some people choose to be very insulated and I don’t understand why.
@ThelmaLou I thought of you today as I was working on my cooking and using the Texas “paper” plate you sent me to organize my chopped veggies. I just love that plate and it makes me smile every time I use it, even though I have not traveled extensively in Texas.
Life in my senior apartments is different. I haven’t found friends but there are a couple of friendly women on my floor and the guys I park next to in the garage are also nice. For many, there’s a language barrier. This neighborhood is heavily Latinx, and I don’t speak Spanish. Some of these mamis followed their husbands across the border and never foraged outside the Spanish-speaking community. Their kids speak English, but their husbands have passed on so they have to rely on their kids to help them navigate. We just smile at each other in the elevator. Maybe now that I have a couple of weekdays free, I can find out what is happening around here. The mgmt isn’t good about telling us what is going on.
I am so happy you have found a couple of friends and a connection with your husband as well. That is just so cool. Are your cats adjusting?
Gosh, I had forgotten about that. 
It makes me happy that you are still enjoying it.
This community is pretty small-- only 70 people. Makes it easier to get acquainted. Not to mention no language barrier.
Re cats, see a couple of posts up. All going well except for EC’s upset tummy before dawn this morning and the ensuing consequences… 
They probably miss being outside to the extent that cats have a sense of past-present. But I’m glad I know they’re safe all the time now. Every night for the 10 years I lived in the house, I’d go out with a flashlight looking for EC (black kitty) after dark. Don’t even mention Tikva (calico) disappearing under the house for days at a time (with the possums, skunks, and raccoons). No more of that nonsense!
Which picture do I like better? This one (she had been under the house all night):
Or this one-- safe in the living room of the apartment:
If the cats aren’t frantically or repeatedly sneakily trying to get out by now, they’re probably comfortable with staying in. (Though I’d still keep a close eye when going through the door – as I’m sure you are – and check that screens on any open windows, when the weather suits, are in good shape and not easily torn by a claw.)
I generally have three or four cats and they’re indoor/outdoor. (Though the current and recent batches have all been a lot easier to get in at night than Tikva!) Cat puke happens. I have easy-to-wash throws over all the beds and it doesn’t usually soak through to the next layer down – but a particularly wet sample occasionally does indeed, and then yes it’s wash all the bedding and if necessary me also! I make sure to always have a spare set of sheets.
And again thanks for the updates and I’m glad it’s going so well!
I once asked on a travel message-board what was the first thing people from different countries do when they get home from a trip (guessing that 99.9999% of people from Britain and Ireland would put the kettle on).
The very first reply was from an American who said ‘I look for cat vomit’.
Um – and in a rather timely fashion, happened this morning, on the bed though not quite on me, probably about half an hour before I would otherwise have gotten up.
Yup, time to change the sheets. (The other bedding was pulled back from that area at the time.)
@ThelmaLou, a suggestion – get some cat grass and/or some hairball paste. When your cats were indoor/outdoor, they probably fed themselves some roughage to help keep their systems cleaned out. Now they don’t have access to outdoor grasses, and may need a substitute.
Yeah, I definitely need to do something like that. Both of them have been outside kitties all of their lives.
Sorry that mine transmitted the vomit order to your household. Or maybe it’s just the season.
This reminds me of humorous product thing I came up with years ago.
Picture the situation: you come home after an event, bringing friends with you, or maybe even your boss. You walk into the house, flip on the lights, and there on the beige/tan/light-colored carpet is a big pile of orange cat throw-up (standard Purina issue). How embarrassing! But with my new product, this will not happen.
Introducing “UPCHUCK KITTY CHOW” – tag line: “Looks as good on the rug as it does in the bowl!”
This revolutionary (and tasty!) dry kibble comes in colors to match your carpeting. We offer beige, brown, rose, green, shag, plaid, striped, and even multi for those expensive Persian carpets.
Now you can walk in with assurance, confident that the little mound of regurgitated UPCHUCK K.C. will blend in with the carpeting and no one will be the wiser. You can pick it up discreetly, using a variety of ruses to explain why you’re squatting down while still wearing your coat. No prob-- “I tripped!” or “I dropped my keys!” Wink! 
We keep your secrets!
That reminds of some cat food I did not buy that was advertising it has turmeric in it. No, please no dyes (even natural) or other things that will create stains should ever be in cat food! Having to clean up cat barf is bad enough, but it should not leave a permanent stain on anything it touches.
Reminds me somewhat of the (possibly apocryphal) woman who walked into a store selling upholstered furniture and, when asked what color she wanted, produced a very fluffy cat and said “Match this!”
That’s exactly how Mrs. Cretin decided on the color* when we re-carpeted the house.
- “Hairball”