There are a vast preponderance of males who don’t wear shirts.
People are never driving their own cars, and are therefore ignorant of the contents.
Never try to outrun a V8-powered police cruiser in some import with a 4-banger.
…or when you’re watching Cops and see your cousin.
My cousin lives two houses away, and I expect to see her husband on Cops one day.
A drunk couple may be about to kill one another, but they’ll magically work together in an attempt to get the law enforcement personnel to leave.
They are never a very good team.
People never know where they’ve just been. If it was to the park, where somebody just got murdered, they were just going to 7-Eleven. If the 7-Eleven just got robbed, they were at the park—but just to fuck somebody up. (But not kill 'em; Momma didn’t raise them that way.)
There used to be a show called Maximum Exposure that was just bizarre real-life video clips from all over the world strung together with snarky narration. “Tonight, on Maximum Exposure: Morons. Stupid, stupid morons”.
They did an episode on police and fire videos, and ran through about a dozen clips from different countries showing the shirtless being arrested. It’s very much a cross cultural thing, apparently.
Dudes should steal a shirt.
It’s difficult to say “I din’t do nuthin’” while face down in a gravel parking lot. That must be why it never seems to work as a defense.
And even if you can outrun the V-8, you can’t outrun the radio.
This is more a meta thing but, why do the more recent vintage COPS episodes feel…less authentic? It got to the point where I was like wait is this reality show staged too?
It was a lot of things like perfect lighting, more weird calls(I think I remember a clown hooker in full makeup?) just felt less real than the earlier episodes.
After running down a perp, tackling him, slamming him to the ground, jamming a knee against the perp’s neck and smashing his face into the pavement, cuffing him, then jerking him to his feet, the cop will always carefully guide the perp into the squad car, lest he bump his head.
mmm
If you are getting arrested in front of cameras, just shut the hell up.
Stupid criminals have no problem waiving their rights so long as they can be stupid and criminal on TV.
Always keep your windows rolled up when driving through the bad part of town, because people will throw their drugs into your car and you’ll be blamed.
And if by chance you’re running around committing crimes, keep your driver’s license current, your taillights fixed and make sure your license plate bulb is working. And you might as well clean up all the fast-food wrappers and other effluvia that’s been collecting in your car for the last 8 years; the cops will still be able to find your drugs.
People ain’t tryin to go to jail.
Motorcyclists attempting escape always try speed, rather than take advantage of their vehicle’s maneuverability, and their ability to jump curbs and cut through places where cars can’t go.
In my small city, here’s how most people get busted for drugs.
An oxy-addled genius runs out of cigarettes. He decides to drive to the convenience store 3 blocks away. His license was suspended a year ago and has since been revoked. He has several outstanding warrants due to failure to appear in court for minor imbecilities. The squalid house he shares with a vague number of other citizens has a car that is used by the various residents. The plates on it are not registered to the vehicle, nor does the vehicle has a current registration. It does, of course, lack some visible piece of safety equipment, like a brake light.
Our genius takes the car after gathering up and pocketing all of his drugs, which he can’t leave at home because they would all disappear. He then proceeds to the convenience store, committing at least one moving violation en route.
Could it get any easier for the police? Car impounded due to lack of registration, no search warrant needed to search. Idiot arrested due to outstanding warrants, no probable cause needed to search.
If the geniuses in my town could learn to walk to the Speedway for smokes, the county jail would be empty or the police would have to work a lot harder.
Except when they see the police, they either pull out their drugs and throw them away or start running.
Ha, that was my very first thoguht upon seeing the thread title. I recall joking with my mother once when I’d taken off my shirt for some reason; “OK, Mom; I’m ready for my appearance on* Cops!”*
My favorite.
When being chased by the cops in LA, it’s better to crash your car in a light pole than accidentally cross the city limits into Burbank.
From what I know about Burbank PD at the time, this may be true.
Like the OP says, if you don’t want to be arrested, put a shirt on.
Putting on a wifebeater give you a 50/50 chance of being arrested
Cops will harass and beat you for no reason, even when they know they’re on camera. They will then congratulate one another about the beat down.
I have a strong suspicion that they don’t show the chases in which the suspect gets away. I did see it once, but they found him later in the episode.
My general observation from the rare times I watch Cops is: I weep for humanity.