I don’t know if this is going to be bitchy enough for the pit, but here goes.
I’m driving home yesterday going up I 5 like I usually do when traffic in front of me stops. I hit the brakes and stop maybe two or three car lengths back from the car in front of me, right as I am about to let my foot off the brake and roll forward, KA-FUCKING-WHAM
I’m thrown back into the seat my car is violently accelerated forward and to the left, the next thing I know I am at over a 45+ degree angle, left side up, as I have been pushed into the cement center divider, I steer to the right to get off the center divider, I feel the car come back down, and I can tell I am headed for the #2 lane when I feel my car impact another car and finally come to a stop.
Park position, key off, flashers on, I unbuckle and open the door. I get out only to find both of my lower legs hurt like hell. Both of my calf muscles feel like I have been beat with a baseball bat for hours, every time the muscle moves I am in major pain.
I hobble out and look at my car. I see the idiot that hit me get out of his car and I yell at him “NICE WORK ASSHOLE”
I don’t go back to talk to the idiot as I don’t want to be arrested for murder.
CHP shows and takes over. asks if anyone is hurt I reply yes, Parameds are called.
While waiting for medical, I get to looking at the accident scene.
There were 4 cars involved. I was #3. #4 hit me, pushed me up the center divider. The #2 car has very little damage, a small dent on the left rear, and a scratch on the left front. The #1 car has a stove in trunk where I hit him. The idiot that hit me, never hit the brakes, but tried to swerve into the next lane, hitting me in the right rear. This set up a trick pool shot where I did not ( or just barely) hit the car in front of me, and instead hit the car in front of that.
Final score
#1 possible total (older car, looks like a couple of grand of repairs)
#2 Minor damage, maybe a grand to fix.
#3 (me) total for sure
#4 (Idiot) make my car look good, gone to the windshield on the driver’s side.
Parameds come, one is asking me questions while the other takes my vitals.
Paramed #1 Any high blood pressure, or hypertension
Me Nope
Paramed #1 you sure?
Paramed #2 132 over 64
Me Seeing how I have just totaled a car, and have been drinking coke and coffee all day, I’m only at 132/64 I’m sticking with no high blood pressure. 
Ambulance comes and loads me up. On the way to the closest hospital, the attendant warns me that this is kind of a low rent hospital. We get there and I find he is right, I think they doing welding and muffler repair in the back.
The X-Ray machine is down the hall and gives a strip of three for a buck. The anesthesiologist sell pain killers from under his coat. Cash only.
They take me into the ER and I swear the doctor sounded just like Dr. Nick from the Simpsons.
He orders X-Rays and wanders off.
I then lay in bed fucking around on Facebook waiting for the X-Rays to come back from the Drug store down the street where they get them developed.
After almost 4 hours a second doctor comes in tells me I have no broken bones (duh, I knew that before the X-Rays) and wanders out.
They come give me a script for a muscle relaxer and Motrin.
What about for pain I ask?
Nurse tells me that I have Motrin.
Thanks, I reply, that will work about as good as baby aspirin. :rolleyes:
I can barely fucking walk and they give me Motrin?
Anyway I get home and try to get some sleep. I was right Motrin works about as good as baby aspirin.
Today I go recover some of my stuff from my car. I also have to go to my doctor to get something that will let me not be in pain.
BTW I am in the wrong part of the car business. To tow my car maybe 6 miles, and keep it overnight, the bill was $400. They only want $55 a day to keep my car there until the insurance company comes and looks at it.
Jesus Christ, I have stayed in many a motel for less than $55/night, they came with a bed, air conditioning, color TV and free parking.
Needless to say I pay the $400 and had my tow truck come get the car and put it in my lot.
This next part is for the idiot that hit me. You sir are too fucking stupid to [del]have a driver’s license.[/del] live.
Every fucking car maker in the world installs this huge piece of glass directly in front of the driver. You are obviously unfamiliar with this item, so let me introduce you to it. It is called a windshield. The windshield is there so that you may see what is happening ahead of you and you may avoid accidents and hurting people.
In the future you might want to consider looking out this large piece of glass and actually looking down the road a bit so you don’t injure people that are just trying to get home unhurt.
When you do see something happening ahead, there is a large pedal located pretty much directly in front of the steering column in the driver’s footwell. It is called the brake. If you step on it, you goat fucking moron, the car will slow to a stop. If you need it to stop sooner, push harder. As you have learned, you can’t get 20 feet from a stopped car while going 65 and expect to be able to swerve or stop in that distance. Pay attention asshole!
Here are some pictures
Get well soon.