…due to her no longer using the litter box. I’m torn on this because she was a young cat, about 2 years old, and it seems bizarre to give up on her so easily, but I also see his point about not wanting to live with an animal that shits all over the place. Apparently it’s been an issue for some time and he’s tried various methods to resolve it to no avail. I’ll see him tonight and get a more complete picture of what exactly he’s done, but it seems my grandmother advised him that once a cat goes outside the box there’s no going back. She has “experience” and while I love her to death, she can be very narrow-minded. I called her and her first words were, “Are you mad about this?” leading me to believe she sees reasons why someone would find this upsetting…yet she’s adamant that he did the right thing. We went back and forth a bit but she’s not budging.
I get that its his right to give away a cat that he can’t live with anymore, but…I just feel sad for the cat and disappointed in my family.
I’m a cat person, always will be. I get it that cats will miss the box because something’s bugging them. There’s something about your uncle’s lifestyle that is incompatible with the cat’s needs ergo the cat drops him messages. It’s best for him AND the cat if they split up. If he had a roommate he couldn’t get along with would you expect him to just carry on or maybe ask the roommate to leave?
I hope he told the future owners about the peeing problem, at least.
As much as I love cats, I probably would’ve done the same. My first 16 years of my life were spent growing up with the biggest, friendliest, most adorable cat in the world. His one downside was due to his age, he no longer used the litter box. He peed on any piece of clothing that was left on the ground. It got really out of control and it was embarrassing having the house smell like that. It must’ve taken a good two years for us to get it all out after he passed. I loved that cat, but would never willingly go through that again. If he was able to find a family that was willing to take the kitty…Well, why not?
He tried everything to get it to stop, blahblahblah. Did he ever take it to a goddamn doctor to rule out a physiological cause?
I’d like to know before I get morally outraged.
Your grandmother may have given bad advice (I can’t tell), but your couldn’t resolve the problem with the cat, and hopefully the person who now has the cat will be better able to deal with it. He didn’t have the cat put down and he didn’t harm it. I’m sure the move could be temporarily stressful for the cat, but I’m guessing it won’t be worse than whatever was making it crap all over the house. How long did this go on? I’m not seeing what there is to be outraged about (to use rachelellogram’s word) here.
If he didn’t take it to the vet and just assumed it was a behavioral issue, then he’s just another pet owner who sees animals as cute/friendly accessories, instead of living beings with potential health problems that the owner is responsible for taking care of.
So what? He didn’t kick it out the door or hit it over the head with a brick. He gave it to another family. It’s probably happier there. Win-win.
Hopefully if it’s physical, the new family/shelter figures it out before lasting harm happens to the cat, or the cat is euthanized as being “unadoptable” by the shelter. It’s hard enough to place cute kittens, much less older cats with behavioral problems.
That would be kind of clueless, but again, hopefully he gave it to someone who knows better. I’m not seeing that as outrage-worthy.
You’re upset he gave it away?
Hell, I would have probably just put the thing out of it’s misery if it crapped all over my house.
One man’s trash…
I agree with you about the importance of medical treatment, but your post reminds me of an attitude I’ve seen 'round the intertubes that suggests people are horrible for giving away their animals when they have behavioral issues that can’t be fixed. I don’t really get this, especially cats, who are about the least emotionally needy creatures I’ve ever met in my life. I think if you get an animal and discover for whatever reason you don’t want to deal with it, it’s more responsible to give it to someone else than to carry on not taking care of it properly. It would of course be better not to take in a pet unless you are sure you can handle the responsibility, but people can be wrong or just particularly unlucky with a pet. My Aunt is a die-hard dog-lover and years ago she adopted one puppy that just could not be trained. It was disruptive to her life and property and a negative influence on her other dogs. She ended up taking her to live on a farm, where she is to this day much better suited and happy. If someone could show me convincing evidence that moving a cat is damaging to its psychological well-being, I would be inclined to change my mind, but until then my general stance is ‘‘Whatever, it’s a cat.’’
I really love my cat, by the way, and will stick with him through thick and thin. I just don’t think he’s human or anything like a human and I feel like the general outrage about ‘‘giving up’’ on animals is ascribing human emotions to a non-human creature. I took him in at two years old. He loved his previous owner and he loves me. Within a half hour of getting him home he was in my lap. Not distressed at all. By the end of the day he was totally used to the house. I don’t see him pining for his old owner or anything. As long as he’s got a warm bed and people to cuddle, he’s happy.
Well, last night’s visit wasn’t as productive as I’d hoped since there were too many people around to really get in-depth on what happened…but he did notify the new owners of the issue and they’re friends of his so he wasn’t just dumping kitty on some stranger.
He said he spoke with his vet and tried for several months some of her suggestions, to no avail. I feel better about the situation, but still wish things had turned out differently.
I had a cat that started peeing outside the box. It was after I’d had him for two years. For three more years I tried everything. I had him checked for urinary problems, I cleaned the carpet, I added a second box(there was one other cat) I sprayed pet freshener. I tried giving him extra love and attention. Nothing worked.
I was getting angry at him, and didn’t want to hurt him. Knowing that nobody would want a cat with this problem I discussed it with the vet, who had tried to help with medical test and so on. I asked him, given the situation, if he thought euthanasia would be a moral option. I couldn’t give him away after raising him, and he wouldn’t be a good pet to anyone else. The vet said he though it was moral, and that I’d done my best to help him.
So I had him put down. I cried, and just before told him it wasn’t his fault. But I couldn’t deal with him any longer.
Been a cat owner all my life. But I have to say, the OP needs to get off of her(?) high horse.
Your uncle doesn’t have to answer to you for shit. Especially, what he decides to do with his cat.
Jeesh, mind your own business.
Your uncle didn’t do anything wrong. It’s none of your business, and he didn’t owe you any explanation at all, let alone the further explanation you seem to be wanting.
What would be the purpose of you “getting a more complete picture of what he’s done”? What’s done is done. MYOB.
What’s wrong with trying to understand the motivations behind his action? How would it be better to mind my own business, never question how someone treats an animal? Getting a complete picture of what he’s done to resolve the situation before giving up would allow me to better understand the type of person my uncle is…or shouldn’t that matter? He can do what he wants, no questions asked, beholden to no one?
Right…
If he hit the cat over the head with a 2x4 you might want to know why, because such an odd action might well reflect on his character. If he dumped the cat on the street, likewise. He didn’t do that though - he gave the cat away, and he told you why - because it persistently peed outside the box. There isn’t anything wrong with that and you knew all you needed to know by the time you posted your OP.
Couldn’t live with the cat. Dealt with it responsibly. Done.
As long as you understand that he’s also learning about you in the exchange, too. 
And to answer your question, if he gave away his cat responsibly, it really isn’t any of your business. I’d say that’s as far as your questions should go; I’d want to know if a relative of mine just dumped a companion animal off without looking after its welfare, but if he gave it to people who he has every reason to expect would look after it, his reasons aren’t really your business.
On preview, what Hello Again said.
Oh, he already knows I’m a brat! 
I said I felt better about it, just wish things were different. I still don’t see what’s wrong with wanting to know how hard he worked before giving up on the cat - that says just as much about a person as what they do with it - but I see the point that it was his cat and his decision.