Very, very sorry. Grieve like ‘you’ need to. It’s your grief.
Lots of hugs and thoughts for you and her.
I’m so sorry to hear this, silenus.
I am so sorry to hear this. Stay strong.
One more voice to the “condolences” choir. You have a solid plan, and the ability to trudge through it. That is one glimmer of good.
Please stay with us - check in when you’d like.
Ah, and I hope it’s okay, I will share the first piece of wisdom I got from the grief counselor * who ran a local widow support group: “People are gonna say the weirdest shit to you right now.”
(asterisk) they help. It seems silly (I thought, what good could they do? Can’t bring my person back) but it really helps to be with people who just fell down the same rabbit hole into this bizarre new world.
There are no words. My deepest sympathies.
I am so sorry to hear this silenus; PLEASE lean on us here as much and as hard as you need to, brother.
I thought this before my husband died (and he was on death’s doorstep many times in our marriage so I thought about it a lot), but after he died, being where we had lived together was, unexpectedly, an enormous comfort. The popular wisdom is not to make any big decisions for at least a year-- your judgment is rocky. The thing is, being there in that house on your own hurts sooo much, but you won’t feel any better being anywhere else… You will hurt no matter where you are, and in a new place, you won’t have the comfort of familiar surroundings. Just my tear-stained 2 cents. YMMV.
We shall see what we shall see. I just might stay put for a bit. But it is all in such flux now that all I can do is lay out tentative plans just to keep myself from feeling totally adrift.
Having lost my spouse a few years ago I can see the wisdom in this. While the rule about not making major life decisions for a year is sound, protecting your mental health is just as important. Unfortunately I have few family left but I did have friends in the area and made more for a decent support network.
I am so sorry to hear about your impending loss. Please accept my sympathies. Take care of your wife in this final time, then take care of yourself.
Again, so sorry to hear this.
I’m sorrier than I can say. It’s good you have so much love and support around you. I hope it’s OK if I join all those churches in praying for you and your beloved wife.
@silenus, I have a huge lump in my throat for you. I know the pain you are facing, will face as you move forward.
I am so, so sorry you are going to go through this. As others have urged, please don’t be shy to use the help offered here and elsewhere.
As someone who also lost her beloved spouse suddenly, I have other advice, but now is not the time. Please reach out if you think I can help in any way.
Right now, I hope you can treasure the time you have left together.
My very best to you.
Thank you. The amount of support that been offered by people I never suspected is amazing.
Very sorry, best wishes to you and family.
So sorry to hear this, Silenus. Try to stay strong, but don’t beat yourself up if you’re not.
So very sorry to hear this. I am sorry you and your wife have to go through this. Peace to you, friend.
Extremely sorry that this has happened, best wishes to you and your family.
So very sorry. This must be awful for you. Worry only about your wife and yourself right now, no one else is needs any attention.
I am very sorry, silenus. Please give yourself a lot of grace and understanding through this period, and accept all of the love and assistance you’re able.
There’s no easy way to do this, but having enough time for everyone to say goodbye is a gift. Peace to you all.
I am so sorry.
So sorry to hear that.