My wife pwns a telescammer

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

in this thread, I noted how my wife handled a telescammer:

[QUOTE=BrotherCadfael]
We’ve gotten a half dozen of these over the last week (they seem to have stopped for the moment, thank goodness). I note that they never say they are from “Microsoft”, they say they are from “Windows” – is that a scheme to lessen their liability if they get caught?

Anyway, we’ve done some things to mess with them - profanity-laden rants, a piercing whistle, and, probably the best, my wife pretending not to speak English, responding to their script with a mixture of Klingon, Dothraki, and gibberish. The guy kept trying to read from his script, restarting from the beginning a few times, and ultimately hung up. Very satisfying.
[/QUOTE]

We recently saw the Book of Mormon musical. Very crude, very rude, very funny.

She saw the telephone number before she answered, and recognizing that a scam call was coming, she answered the phone with “Hasadiga?” The guy started his spiel, and she resumed her Klingon/Dothraki/gibberish bit, leading each sentence off with “Hasadiga”, and dropping it into the middle of sentences as seemed appropriate.

As per plan the guy got increasingly flustered: “Hasidiga?”

“Yes, yes, Hasadiga. Is there anyone there who can speak English?”

“Hasadiga?”

“Right, Hasadiga, Hasadiga. Please can anyone speak English?”

“Hasadiga!”

“No, not Hasadiga, English!”

“Hasadiga?”

“No, NO RUSSIAN, English!”

She got him to say it, like, thirteen times!
Eventually, he hung up. Truly, she pwned him but good.

Per **Shodan **(from the other thread): All hail the uber-geekness of BrotherCadfael’s wife!

2

Ain’t nobody got time for dat!

3

I got a telemarketing call one time at my parents house while I was babysitting. It was from some dude that was selling windows or siding or alarms or some stupidness of that nature. So Janisnevvy#1 (who was about three at the time) is jumping up and down going “Jay Jay Jay Jay??? " Because he thought it was his Uncle Jay on the phone. I tell the guy " One moment please,” & hand the phone to him, & he’s just jabbering away at this dude , and you can understand about every third word he says. I let him talk for a minute or two, then told him “tell the nice man bye” “G’bye!” " I took the phone & told the guy " That was my nephew, and he thought you were my brother" " Oh how adorable!" “Anyway, we don’t want any” click

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I’m trying to see how long I can keep them on the line before they give up. My record is 22 minutes.

5

Uh… You all do know what “Hasadiga” means, don’t you??

6

I am ashamed to say No, I don’t. I have never seen the musical, and I will never be as cool as Mrs. Cadfael.

Regards,
Shodan

7

Never heard of it. Never heard of the musical either.

8

I know what it means in the context of The Book of Mormon, but in reality isn’t it just made up?

9

No idea what it means.

10
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Me, either, but I’d like to find out.

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For those of you who don’t click links, “hasa diga” means “fuck you” in the made-up language of the natives in “The Book of Mormon” musical.

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I got my first one of these a few days ago. (I went with a wimpy response - “Er, I have a Macintosh <CLICK>”) The strange thing was, the caller ID listed the caller as coming from area code 408 (San Jose / southern Silicon Valley).

The trouble is, I got a legitimate call (from my credit card company - I had a Best Buy charge yesterday and an online purchase today, and it set off a flag somewhere) where the ID was the same as what normally appears for a scammer/telemarketer.

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Ah, shit. Well, I’ll stick with my method of giving them a chance to be a legitimate call first, then go telescammer response on them.

15

Nice. But regarding the “piercing whistle” method, that’s just fucked up. The guy’s just trying to do his job, no reason he should have to go deaf just for your amusement.

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I don’t recommend piercing whistles but you do know that the guy’s job is to install malware on little old ladies’ computers and then make them pay to remove it, right? The guy knows what his job is and just trying to do it is not something he needs to be supported in.

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I don’t answer them at home or on my cell. If I don’t recognize the number, I don’t answer the call. If its important, they will leave a message.

However…at work…we have a game where the receptionist will transfer the call to someone else. That person will transfer the call to someone else. (of course, we use the mute function to tell whoever we are transferring the call to what is going on.) “Oh, I’m not the one in charge of the copier, let me transfer you to that person.”

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Meow why would she do that?

No, he’s not “just trying to do his job,” these are notorious scammers. These people are “just doing their jobs” like Goebbels and Himmler were “just following orders.”

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“His job” involves gaining access to your computer and installing malware, which is generally considered a crime. A lot of times they ask for your credit card number and bill you for this shit. If someone’s job is basically stealing from people, I really don’t give a fuck if he goes deaf or not. (Especially since their victims are usually elderly people)

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Got one today
Very heavy accented “Eric” who wanted Mr&Mrs blank. Told him no one of that name lived here click
Monica wanted to speak to me about my Windows computer "I’m sorry,I don’t own a computer"click
I don’t want to be mean,but I don’t want to be bothered