I remember, as a young Catholic girl, learning about this one particular saint, male, who was roasted over open flames in front of an entire town. One of the executioners said to him, “Any last requests?” and the saint repsonds something smartass like, “Yes, turn me over. I’m getting too done on this side.” Haha–that Christian martyr humor. Anyway, what particular saint is this, does anyone know?
Would that be Saint Ham Burger?
===ducks and runs===
Laurence/ Lawrence.
No real evidence that he ever said that in reality, although it makes a good story.
And appropriately, St. Lawrence is the patron saint of cooks.
How large a party does you average saint feed, anyway, in 8 oz. servings?
Must not have been English if he objected to being toasted on one side only…
There’s a serious page on St. Lawrence here:
http://www.catholic-forum.com/saints/saintl02.htm
and this (also serious) page actually uses the “turn me over” quote:
http://valinor.purdy.wayne.edu/lawrence.html
Feast day on Aug 10th, just the right time for that summer barbeque.
And bibliophage, he’s the patron of libraries too.
Eohippus, A rough guess would be 120lb saint, less about 1/3 for bones and 1/6 for inedible viscera. That leaves about 60 lbs meat. So my guess is 120 8oz servings. I’ve never dressed out a person, but I’m sure somebody will have a better guess and a website soon. Ick.
To all of you–
Thank you so much!!!
This has been bugging me for awhile.
About all I’d be able to add to the facts here is a “me-too-ism” of “Yeah, it was St. Lawrence.”
However, I’m jumping into this thread because it provides the opportunity to tell one of my favorite true stories:
Canton, New York, is the county seat of St. Lawrence County, so called because it’s on the St. Lawrence River. (I think the river got named because one of the early French explorers discovered it on St. Lawrence’s feast day, a la many of the other Spanish and French saint place names.) The large village (pop. ~10,000) is also the home to St. Lawrence University, originally founded by the Unitarians.
It’s a small school, academically fairly good, but except for Lacrosse its sports program is pretty well defunct.
I grew up about 50 miles south, in the city where the daily newspaper for the area was published. The last year that SLU participated in intercollegiate football, they fielded an abysmally poor team, which was defeated regularly.
Just outside Ogdensburg, another city in the same vicinity, is a small seminary for the training of Catholic priests. Working for the daily newspaper was a dropout from that college, who happened one day to pull the job of writing the headlines for the sports page, just as SLU dropped another football game by something like 86-3.
He composed perhaps the greatest sports headline of all time:
Don’t be silly. Everybody knows you serve saint on the bone. 
Don’t be silly. Everybody knows you serve saint on the bone.
Don’t be silly. Everybody knows you serve saint on the bone.
Ahhh, crap! I’m sorry, I just kept getting an error message…:o
Polycarp:
Thanks. That’s pretty damn good. Improved my day.