[ol]
[li]The sack was opaque.[/li][li]The guy who left it there (not me) went away in the middle of “grocery unloading”, and figured we’d find it & put it away.[/li][li]The sack was dumped in an area we “set junk down” in.[/li][li]Everybody had forgotten we bought ground beef, during a family discussion.[/li][li]We re-use plastic bags to carry things, store paper, etc.[/li][/ol]
If you have an ant infested apartment, do not leave a honey bear out with lid even a *hair * open, while you go on vacation for a weekend.
You come home to hundreds of honey-entombed ants.
Gross.
My Coma-inducing Mystery Smell, which had me cleaning and scouring under the kitchen sink, scrubbing down the fridge and freezer, and sticking my head all the way to the back of the oven turned out to be a styrofoam take-out container full of Indian food in my microwave.
A friend of mine and I had gone out to eat weeks previously, and then come back to my house with our leftovers. He had eaten some more of his when we got to my house, and then decided to store the remainder in my microwave (which I rarely used), because apparently that’s what they do with their To-Go food in his family. (What, they didn’t have a refrigerator? They want their “doggie bag” to smell like a DEAD dog?) The best part was that he left my METAL FORK in the container, and the fork turned black.
On careful review of this Thread, I have come to the conclusion that every home needs a Hazmat Suit.
Yanno, I think you may be right…anybody got a copy of the Waste Management Catalog?
If you happen to live in a roach infested house, do NOT buy one of those dinette tables that have hollow metal legs. I learned this the hard way as I was preparing to move the table by removing the legs (when you’re moving everything in a 1969 Impala there’s a limit to the size of item that can be packed in it) and literally POUNDS of live roaches came cascading out and scattered all over the floor in every direction. The only thing that made this vaguely okay was that the table would’ve been one of the first items moved, so we abandoned the thing and were WAY more careful about disinfecting and debugging everything else we packed. I am happy to report that the apartment we moved to remained roach free!
Don’t leave a half full bottle of orange juice in your bag when you throw it into the closet. Unless you use that bag very soon, you will not be happy you did this. The juice will be brown and thicker than it used to be, and the cap will be covered in black slime.
Oh my god, I think I’m going to be sick. Or die. Either way, it’s going to smell.
I live on my own and right now I’m eyeing everything suspiciously and have my Mortein at hand.
Don’t leave a whole watermelon on top of the fridge for a couple of months - it may look ok, but as soon as you pick it up, the middle will fall straight out of it and shower you, the floor and the whole kitchen with foul smelling gunk. Yes, i do know this from personal experience.
My Mom was transferred to another city & rented out the house. Some tenants left mysteriously, so my brother & I went to clean up. Apparently, the ex-tenants fished a lot. They’d wrapped a lot of their catch & stored it in an upright freezer. Of course, the power had been off for weeks. Of course, it was summer in Texas…
My own close call: While sorting through the pantry, I found a can of anchovies that had swollen to twice its size. I managed to toss it without incident. Surely, an anchovy bomb would be considered a WMD.
When travelling from food stores, always make sure those gallon jugs of milk are secure. As a kid, my Mom was in a traffic situation where she had to hit the brakes hard. The gallon jug became airborne & spit in half against the floor of the back seat.
That smell never gets better nor does it ever come out.
Then you’ll love this story of adorable kittens and cute puppies frollicking in fields of dandilions.
If you have roommates that are complete slobs, DO NOT try to reform them by showing them the consequences of their inactions. For instance, if they are unfamiliar with the concept of taking out the trash, do not “teach them a lesson” by not taking it out yourself for several weeks.
Not convinced? Imagine waking up one morning and walking around your apartment bleary eyed and barefoot. Imagine being a little surprised that overnight, wall to wall carpeting has been installed. Imagine that the carpet is… crunchy. Commence with the wretching.
Another tip, one I learned last summer: If you buy questionable shellfish on the hottest day of the year, and decide that it’s too questionable to eat, and your apartment has the habit of losing electrical power during heat waves, and you’re going on vacation the next day, DO NOT assume that the shellfish will be OK in the fridge during that time. Six months later, there will still not be enough baking soda in the known universe to unfishify the fridge.
Checking expiration dates on things you get from my mom’s fridge or my fridge is a necessary survival skill.
Mayonnaise expiration dates do not have a six-month grace period.
Mayonnaise six months out of date tastes a bit like Miracle Whip.
You shouldn’t keep eating something if it doesn’t taste quite the way it should. Even if the unexpected taste isn’t so bad, and you’re really hungry.
Coffee left in the pot too long will eventually get patches of mold floating on it.
Heh. I understand quite well how this is possible. Sometimes you, you know, fill up your counter space.
I’ve done it with vegetables, but never meat.
Here’s one of my own - seeing a lot of fruit flies? Cleaned everywhere you think you can clean and still seeing a lot of fruit flies? Consider briefly how long it has been since you took that little compost holder thing out to the compost pile. Then take it and throw it in the outside trash can. DO NOT OPEN IT. Thank me later.
While you’re at it, check that cooler that you haven’t used since the summer, when you resolved to take healthier snacks to the beach.
I’ll third this: take the trash out. Today!
The floor should not be crunchy.
Also, if you’re a college age slob guy living with your buddy and neither of you ever use the oven, and you decide to bake a turkey for Thanksgiving-- do not put the carcass back in the oven because you’re out of counter space! Weeks later it will become… fragrant… and the oven will be the last place you check. :eek:
I had something similar happen, but with fresh asparagus. See I left it on the counter (I don’t remember why), and ended up covering the bag with other junk items. I totally forgot I even bought asparagus, 'til I noticed a strange smell, and saw a sickly green slime trail oozing down the side of my counter.
It didn’t even look like vegetables anymore.
Cilantro will just become black scum with no indication whatsoever of cellular structure.
Most vegetables will, given enough time.
Beware the Judas Egg.