I’m currently dating a woman who I think is a virgin or is, at the very least, extremely inexperienced sexually for an American woman her age (late 30s). My ex-wife (I’ve been divorced for seven years) was diagnosed with cervical cancer a while back, so there’s a chance that I (like many/most sexually active men) am an asymptomatic HPV carrier. Should I recommend she get the HPV vaccine before we have intercourse? Or am I paranoid?
I think the HPV vaccine is a great idea for everyone who’s had little to no sexual experience, but is planning on having more such experiences in the future.
I think we’ll be seeing more populations recommended for HPV, as more data comes in. Right now, it’s not really been shown to be cost-effective to vaccinate both male and female populations over age 26, and males over 21 aren’t a real high priority target at present. But most experts these days do advocate vaccinating folks up to age 26.
Now it may be futile to vaccinate someone who’s 21 but already had half a dozen or more partners, since about 50-70% of the population has carried the virus at one time. But for someone with a past hx of few to no partners, it’d be a good idea.
And that’s my informed medical two cents.
You can get tested.
It ain’t that easy. One needs a sample of tissue that’s actively infected by the virus to identify it. Women can get cervical swabs tested, But a guy would need to have a urethral swab, or scraping/bx from a lesion. And if the wrong spot is tested, an infection will go unnoticed. And one can have a subclinical infection that’s not producing abnormal tissue at present, so tests would be negative. And there’s no blood test looking for HPV markers available.
(bolding mine)
Standard advice is to avoid sleeping with someone when you can’t so much as articulate if you’ve done it before or not, or they can’t articulate it to you. That said, it’s hugely likely you have it, so if it’s likely that she doesn’t, I think this falls squarely into the “can’t hurt, might help” category, particularly if it’s covered by her insurance.
Just talk to her. If she’s in her 30s and you don’t even know if she’s had sex before, you two have a lot to talk about, and this is just one topic.
Exactly. I have no symptoms of any kind, and haven’t had unprotected intercourse in two years. It was my understanding that there really wasn’t a reliable test for men.
We’ve kind of gotten to that. I won’t go into details here other than to say that this is someone who is terribly uncomfortable with frank discussions like this (though utterly responsible in every other way–holds an advanced degree, owns a home, has a healthy circle of friends and an admirable career, just has done very, very little dating). You are right, of course.
We’ve had that talk for the most part. The purpose of this thread (for me) is to inform myself going into discussions with her.
You know, my advice to the kids on the high school debate team I coach when they ask about sex is: don’t do adult things until you’re ready to act like a responsible adult. (This comes up when I advise them to wait, but if they don’t want to listen, they should go get tested every 6 months, etc etc).
If your girlfriend isn’t grown up enough to talk about something like sex, she’s not grown up enough to have it-- advanced degrees not withstanding.
Doesn’t the type of HPV that leads to cervical cancer generally fall to undetectable levels after a couple of years anyways? My understanding was that the body generally fights that type of HPV infection off after a couple years, and it is no longer transmissible. But this is something I’ve always inferred but never seen very clearly stated. Maybe Qadgop can set me straight on this.
IMHO if she’s made it to her 30s and doesn’t have HPV, she should get the vaccine. I have a friend who is sexually active but has managed to avoid it, and we had a discussion about her getting the vaccine, even though her insurance doesn’t cover it. I think she should (I’m a woman who has HPV…just a friend, I’m straight).
I don’t think most insurances cover it for over 26 or whatever, but if she can afford it she should do it.
Generally, yes. But not always. IIRC, upwards of 80% of people clear the virus after a couple of years. But if 1 in 5 don’t, those are still high odds for possible exposure.