I have seven years without smoking and I often think about it. I quit more times than I can tell you but the only time it worked was when I was ready. That sounds lame but it is so important. If he is not ready he will start again. It is such a personal thing. One day it is over and then you find the crutch that will assist you in your withdrawl. For me it was nicorette gum but everyone has their thing. Just know that it is the hardest thing he will ever do. Good luck to both of you!
Watching my mother choke to death on chunks of her own cancerous lungs was a wonderful motivator. The nightmares I had in which her extremely unpleasant death was replayed were pretty important, too.
I, too, had skin reactions to the patch. I used it anyway. And I was up to a tin a day of Altoids mints. And when I absolutely couldn’t f**king stand it any more, I’d do pushups until I couldn’t move.
And it still took me fourteen months to really quit. The method was “cold turkey, with patch and mints to keep my big stupid mouth busy,” with occasional backsliding. Mid-December of 2003 was when I smoked my last cigarette. By that time, I was down to no more than a cigarette a month or so, and the craving was down to a minimum.
Haven’t smoked since, aside from my annual Christmas cigar, which I do not inhale.
For some reason, though, I occasionally still smoke in my dreams.
I guess you never know what will push you over the edge. After my second bronchial pneumonia session I decided to smoke a certain small cigar that has a built-in holder on the tip and has an outer wrapper that is tobacco made into a sort of paper and rolled into a cigar. My reasoning was that I wouldn’t inhale them and thus I could still smoke without damage. Ha! I discovered upon smoking the second one in the box that they are so Goddam awful (for me) that I decided nothing was better than this, threw the remainder in the trash and haven’t smoked since, or even wanted to.
These are all great suggestions so far, much better than the useless pamphlet from the doctor’s office! Master Wang-Ka, that’s so totally horrible that you had to see your mother go through that. My grandma died of lung cancer too so I really feel for you.
Really if he had cut back to one cig a day and been on that for a few weeks, he really shouldn’t be suffering badly from withdrawal. Gradually cutting back in strength and number is the best way to avoid having any withdrawal symptoms after quitting.
Keeping something in his mouth like chewing gum or some sort of hard candy will help, also something to keep his hands busy. Best to stay away from situations where others will be smoking for awhile too.
Smoking was such a huge part of my identity for so long I thought I’d never quit - it was my last vice and there was no way I was giving it up, dammit! I smoked a pack a day, everyday, no matter how sick, etc., I was, and that was after watching my father die of lung cancer for 18 months when he was 48.
If I knew how relatively easy it was, I would have done it so much sooner. I almost feel like some other part of me planned it. I started collecting nicotine replacements that I told no one about, and trying them. I had my doctor prescribe the inhaler one - I liked that one particularly. I started taking Wellbutrin. Then I found myself writing down my reasons for quitting and my reasons for smoking down in a little notebook that I still carry with me everywhere. I was just starting to get too embarassed to smoke anymore. I was ashamed of it. Then one night before I went to bed, I slapped on a patch and when I woke up in the morning, I gathered up my 27 ashtrays that were strewn around the house and put them in the garage, and I didn’t tell anyone about it for a couple of days. I used the patch for twice the amount of time they recommended and kept cutting it into ever-smaller slivers before I stopped using it altogether. If I really was having a hard time, I used another replacement in addition (inhaler or gum). I basically threw every single thing available at the problem. I avoid smokers like the plague, including my mother. That was over a year and a half ago and I never relapsed once. I don’t think of myself as a smoker anymore, I didn’t gain one pound, and I like myself so much better now. My partner was great, btw. She never said one word to me about any of it. She wasn’t judgemental of my smoking and while she was supportive when I quit, I never got the feeling she was *invested * in it, which was a neat trick on her part, because I’m sure she was. 'Scuse me, I have to go give her a big kiss now…
Best of luck to him and you, too 
.
I do too! I wake up with a horrible feeling of letdown and guilt, then I realize it didn’t really happen.
I certainly recognise that feeling, it seems to be a very common thing. I experienced that for about six months after I gave up, despite rarely thinking about smoking in my waking hours, but now I don’t even dream about it.
Well, I think it’s time for a fresh (and this time, successful) attempt. I’ve been smoke-free for four minutes. So far, so good!
A coworker recently told the story that his parents had both been chain smokers for decades, and had used all kinds of techinques to attempt to quit, like the patches, changing brands, gradual withdrawal, cold turkey, etc, but they always resumed smoking again. This went on for several years. Then one day they announced that they were going to quit smoking by going to see a hypnotist. My coworker was imaging a series of private therapy sessions, but his parents said it was just one big group session. They saw an ad in the paper for a big stop-smoking hypnosis session, where the organizer had rented a big conference room at a Holiday Inn. You just sign up, pay your money, and sit in a chair along with a hundred other people. My coworker laughed them, and told them not to waste their money on this pointless scam.
They went anyway. It worked. They never smoked again after that.
I don’t think the hypnotist performed any miracles here, I just think that unlike their prior attempts, they finally both were mentally ready and committed to quit smoking when they walked into the room.
Me too! I used to feel guilty (both in my dreams and when I woke up) but lately I’ve stopped feeling guilty and now enjoy my dreamtime smokes.