Hey guys, don’t piss on the seats and floor of the public toilets. Thanks!
I sure wish the American legal system allowed “asswhoopin” as a punishment. Nobody needs an asswhoopin’ as much as someone who’ll deliberately piss on the seats and the floor.
You had that good of a vacation and you are complaining? :eek:
Does this mean our second date is off? 
No, you are. Go sit in the corner and we’ll have someone come by and water you twice a day. Your place is by the sign that says “I was too dumb to solve a puzzle that would insult a bright ten-year-old”. :rolleyes:
Fuck you Sharon Stone for being so incredibly hot in Basic Instict 2 that I thought I was going to hit the ceiling… That movie sucked so bad when she wasn’t on the screen, so I ended up getting very angry at myself for only watching the movie to indulge in her seductive sultriness.
Fuuuuck.
When I was in high school the national honor society had a fundraiser where we would show passerby at the supermarket how to use a newfangled MBank “Pulse” machine. This was around 1988. I was telling my wife about how long ago that was. Seems like those demonstrations are still needed…
BERRIES AND CREAM, BERRIES AND CREAM, I’M A LITTLE LAD WHO LIKES BEEERRRRIIIIESSSSS AAAAANNND CRRREEEEAAAAMMMM!!!
Since when do women need an excuse for that? I sure as hell don’t know any guys who would insist on one (an excuse).
Oh - and as for the 4 gallons of water:
I say “fuck it”. Fill the 5 gallon bucket 4/5 of the way to the top and call it a day. If they wan’t to get technical, I’d claim I used my hands to measure the side of the bucket. But in reality, I just ballparked it.
The other side of both: 
1.Yes you sent me a note, no I am not attending. Why do your think RSVP is some sort of magical spell that means I have to respond or I am rude? Maybe you are the rude one for demanding a response whether or not I am interested in your shindig. (OTOH, if I don’t respond thenI can’t show up, fair enough. )
Yes, a RSVP is a magical spell that means you have to respond or you are rude. If you don’t know what it means, look it up. No, you don’t have to respond when specifically asked to do so, but if someone has taken the time and expended the effort to invite you to a social function, it is extremely rude and inconsiderate not to respond - especially when an e-mail takes 30 seconds.
They should hold up the little debit card thing and say, “I don’t know how this works.” Could we please get some consistency in card readers so I don’t look like a clueless idiot when I can’t figure out that your card reader has me chose the card type before swiping, or swipe my card backwards from the 5 readers I used yesterday, or requires me to use a “pen” to indicate my choices, or ARG!!!
For fuck’s sake, I just want to buy my shit and leave, not take a course in figuring out your card reader. Fuck it…you run my card on your register and ring it up as credit and we’ll call it a day!
To my sweet old dog: Your hip is fucked! Quit trying to run up the stairs–you are grounded to the downstairs. Quit sneaking up on the bed then jumping off. Quit starting rowdy games with your younger pack mates and getting them in trouble for playing with your crotchety old ass. Damn, I’m going to miss you when you go.
Hey, cheer up, you could always have a barbecue!
What?
On to my minirant: Bitch, I can understand wanting to wipe the crud off your dashboard while you drive toward me on this narrow side road. I can even understand yapping on the cellphone you’re holding to your ear as you drive, though if it were me, I’d’ve pulled over to take/make the call. But GOOD GRAVY ON WAVY MELLOW YELLOW BITCH, must you do BOTH while your frickin megavan drifts over the center line toward my Scion?!?
Wow, I had no idea my post would cause such interest! 
Four Jellybeans, well done Jodi and Aspidistra!
This is the solution I wrote down, but Kat and Miller came up with good alternate solutions. I do swear to og I already learned both these experiments with a kids’ “Math is fun!” book I read in about second grade. That one was also in Die Hard just compounds the idiot laziness of the place.
With the 9.5 remaining minutes I drew little diagrams with buckets and arrows and jellybeans in little groups. I wonder if I’ll get extra credit for my artistic ability…somehow I doubt it. :rolleyes:
Well, it is only a mini-rant.
The gas company can fuck itself for charging me to pay my bill any way but by mail. I can’t pay it online as I can pay my other bills; if I pay by phone, it’s six bucks; if I pay at the supermarket, it’s two bucks. Grr. When I’m Queen of Pennsylvania, they will be forced to do my bidding, and that means payment options that are free. (I pay my bills online. It’s not that it’s inconvenient to write a check and drop it in the mail; it’s that it’s the one bill I have to do that with.)
My mother is an idiot. She called me a few minutes ago, wondering why web pages have scrambled text. Gee, Mom, I bet all those fucking toolbars and crap you download have something to do with it. I told her to run Spybot and AdAware. If nothing else, it’ll fix the zillion-and-a-half other spyware-caused problems her computer has.
Tell you what, Mom. Next time I see you, bring your computer and CDs because I’m going to format it and start over. And I will NOT give you administrative privileges so you won’t be able to download any more crap. (If this gives you any insight, my mother downloaded a toolbar that fills in her credit card number and personal information on websites. She’s that ignorant.)
I have a headache. I need to lie down now.
Robin
Black flies, mosquitoes, black flies, ticks, black flies, deer flies, black flies, horse flies, black flies, black flies, and black flies, which are the true communists of Canada, all wanting a piece of my ass.
Update: Running AdAware and Spybot didn’t fix the browser problem, but it did fix everything else. I had her try IE instead of Firefox, and that worked, so she’s going to uninstall Firefox and re-install it. I’m glad something worked.
Okay, I will give you that one. 
Actually, I have one of those also. RoboForm keeps all of that information securely encoded, generates completely random passwords, and you only need to remember one in order to use all of them. Really nice addition to your browser if you do things like bill paying online.
I think you’ve answered your own question. 
This wasn’t RoboForm, though. I don’t know what it was, but it’s not RoboForm.
Robin
Didn’t figure it was actually, from the sounds of the rest of her set up. But you might want to look into it for her, if she wants that kind of function on her browser. At least then she would have a solid program, with encryption and no spy- or adware. And no, I don’t work for them or get paid by them.
Freaking Fannie Farkle, kids, get off my pavement!
The light I’m headed towards is green.
The light you’re headed towards indicates don’t even think about walking.
You do the math.
Then don’t try to hit my car and give me the finger as I turn, 'cause you thought I’d stop my turn to let your mass of mouthbreathers try to cross anyway.
I didn’t write the laws or put up that intersection!