Cherish your testicles while you have them, gentlemen. You never know when a rot-crotched baboon is going to bite you, and end the dream.
Maybe I’ll give my testicles a candlelit bath tonight in appreciation of them. 
Treat every night with your testicles as the last! Read them poetry. Sooth them with exotic oils. Scent them with rare perfumes.
What about spanking the monkey?
Let me be the first to say, band name!
(And I have to admit that until I clicked the link, I thought it was a disease that was causing baboons to eat testicles.)
This is exactly why I keep telling people that we should exterminate all monkeys and apes. That and the the Planet of the Apes movies.
Monkey-fucking is heretical and anathema, according to the Primate of Greece.
I’m with you. Nuke the dirty monkeys!
That’s easy for you to say. You weren’t at that party.
You’d a done her.
Gorilla my dreams.
Having my testicles getting slammed in the door of the international space station is a more pressing concern than a testicle eating baboon virus.
Heck, meeting a woman to have sex with so I can then run the risk of catching the virus is a more pressing concern.
Speaking of bad one liners:
Don’t fuck the monkey, or the next monkey that could be fucked is you!
New Iron Grip ™ condoms have been proven to reduce the ability of baboons to bite off your penis by 15% while reducing your chances of the testicle eating virus! On sale at your nearest 7-11.
Yeah, CRorex, I want a link to the emu rape in Louisiana too. I googled but had no luck.
I’d like to see someone try to fuck a baboon and still be able to worry about his balls rotting off afterward.
Not to dump on everyone’s monkey-fucking parade, but the articles I’ve read indicate that monkey-human virus transmission (especially in the case of ebola) is probably due to humans EATING monkeys. It’s a lot harder to stop malnourished people from acessing a free source of protein than it is to curb bestiality (okay, I don’t have a cite for that bit).
And, if the virus mutates into a human-transmissable one, then it doesn’t matter how the original transfer was made, does it?
mischievous
I imagine it matters to the monkey!
This thread has gotten very disturbing, very fast.
You didn’t find the orginal premise disturbing?
*Well, monkeys eating tesicles, that’s okay. Oh, whoops, it’s a DISEASE that eats testicles. No problem, that’s what all my favorite diseases do.
But this monkey-eating is just icky!*
Sorry, correction: It started out disturbing, and went downhill from there! Better? 
I’m not too worried, as I’ve never had the desire to either copulate or consume a monkey, or any non-human primate for that matter. (Well, unless you count my ex.)
That’s why I always take my monkey well done.